Nicoles’ Sexy “Stalk”: Janice’s Breathy Walk!

Saucy Dean apes sultry Petallides: Fox-y catwalk catfight? Playful FNC meteorologist Janice Dean made racy sport of her colleague FBN correspondent Nicole Petallides‘ “stalk walk” this morning to the great delight of Fox & Friends‘ co-hosts and its fans.

Less than five minutes after the always sensual Nicole gave her usual “walk-and-talk” business report (from the floor of the New York Stock exchange), a playful Janice appeared for her weather report outside the studio.* After her intro from F&F co-host Steve Doocy as the “Snowball Machine,” Janice remarked, “Now, Steve, Gretch [Carlson], and Brian [Kilmeade], I’m a big fan of Nicole Petallides’ stalk walk, you know when she walks and she talks about the stock. So…I think I’m going to do a weather walk: So, I’m going to talk about the weather while I walk.”  Raising her eyebrows wantonly, she purred, “Are you ready? Are you ready for this?”

Excitedly, Gretchen interposed, “Oh, my gosh!”

Pulling back her shoulders, Janice began to sexily sashay down the F&F veranda. As Steve giggled and Gretchen cackled, Janice breathily began to give her weather report. Joining in the bawdy fun, producers suddenly started to play stereotypical sexploitation music (a la Shaft‘s theme): Naughtily, an off-cam Steve teased, “Janice, how would you describe the voice you’re using right now?”

Staying in character, an undaunted Janice continued her rutty strut, cooing, “It’s my weather walk voice!” As an appreciative Steve laughed, an even more impressed Gretchen intoned, “Oh, my gosh! This is fantastic!” As Janice beamed broadly, a randy Brian interjected, “By the way, Ted on camera is going to need a shower after this segment!”

Bowing after her bravo performance, Janice declared, “There’s my weather walk everybody!” Smiling, Steve said, “Very nicely done! Pioneering a new aspect on Fox & Friends!” Chiming in, Gretchen added, “Janice, you realize [that] we’re going to expect that everyday now!”

Enthusiastically, Janice answered, “Fantastic! It’s the only time I’m going to get exercise.”

As the segment ended, Brian pronounced, “So, that’s the weather walk. Nicole will have her answer at some point, I’m sure.”

Indeed. And, assuredly, the gammy Greek goddess’ votaries eagerly await that answer to the cheeky Canadian’s challenge.

Until then, kudos, Janice! And, encore! Encore!

*Fox & Friends – 02/28/13 (@ 8:38 a.m. ET)

Soledad’s Fall: CNN’s Spring?

Zucker’s “Morning in America”: O’Brien toast–again. Starting Point anchor Soledad O’Brien has been iced again as the face of CNN’s dawn according to the New York Times. Throwing cold water on Soledad’s vain hopes to finally prevail in the cable news morning ratings wars, CNN’s new chief Jeff Zucker finally cried, “No mas.”

As long-time CNN viewers may know, Soledad and Miles O’Brien co-hosted American Morning from 2003 to 2007 and were replaced by Kiran Chetry and John Roberts to revitalize flagging ratings. Over four years later (July 15, 2011), Soledad ominously returned to the show to substitute for Kiran for her first absence after AM announced Kiran’s own imminent departure from the still ratings-challenged show. Subsequently, when the ill-fated AM folded at the end of the year, Soledad was given a second chance to redeem herself and the CNN brass in the new year with Starting Point in the 7-9 a.m. ET hours. Unfortunately, for Soledad, she failed to seize the opportunity and sunk the show to even lower depths.

Yesterday, the New York Times reported that Zucker was pulling the plug on Soledad and that she would leave Starting Point this spring. According to the old Gray Lady, Zucker had “decided even before he started the job in January that he wanted to replace…[her program]…with a brand new one.” As to Soledad’s future, it added that she would create a new production company and “continue to supply documentaries to CNN on a nonexclusive basis.”

Putting a positive spin on her departure to the Hollywood Reporter, Soledad said, “I will not miss getting up that early, I cannot lie, not for a minute.” Defending her show itself, she declared, “We had a staff  of people–we never were fully staffed–where we were able to in spite of not getting a lot of support really make our show relevant. To do that, that was pretty tremendous.”

Soledad’s fall: CNN’s spring. It will be morning in Zucker’s America again soon.

Sexy Aly: “My New Website”

“What do you think?” Fox & Friends Weekend co-host Alisyn Camerota may always be “Puerto Rico Perfect”: But, her site could use some work. Two days before Valentine’s Day, the sexy siren heralded the debut of her personal new web site alisyncamerota.com. As Aly gave an appreciative nod to its apparent creator, her talented assistant Jenn Marie Rivera, for her “mastery,”  she asked her fans for their reviews.

As for the author, he gives Aly’s site three stars (out of five) in its present state. The “Home,” “In the News,” and “Facebook” sections pass muster but the “About” and “Gallery” are not quite up to par. For new F&FW viewers, the “About” section gives them the mistaken notion that Aly has continually co-hosted the show since 2000: In reality, Aly co-anchored it during the early-to-mid 2000’s with Kiran Chetry and Julian Phillips (and, later, with Kelly Wright) and returned to captain the crew of Clayton Morris and Dave Briggs in 2008. As to the “Gallery,” it is mainly a prosaic pictorial chronology of Aly on the program (other than her fun, frisky “Action Heroes” shots): perhaps, it should be spiced up with more personal and/or saucy shots of the Italian dish, a la the infamously deleted bikini pic.

Aly’s site: still a work in progress. But, hats off to Jenn for a good start!

Gretch’s Valentine Secret: “Not…For Broadcast!”

“Everyone’s going to have a good Valentine’s Day but me now.” Oops! Fox & Friends du jour “Dr. Love” Marc Siegel let co-anchor Gretchen Carlson‘s off-air romance remark about her hubby Casey Close out of the bag this morning–much to her chagrin. Poor Casey!

In the segment about medical love myths, Gretchen asked Dr. Siegel whether “love at first sight” exists.* After he had declared that it does indeed, co-host Brian Kilmeade interjected, asking if nature was thereby drawing men and women together to procreate. Emphatically, Dr. Siegel asserted, “Absolutely true, within the first couple of seconds!” Elaborating, perhaps, a mite too much, he declared, “It’s not all over after that….Well, you guys…told me you didn’t really love at first sight.” Pointing to Gretchen, Dr. Siegel added, “You didn’t have love at first sight with Casey, you told me.”

Her face reddening to match her dress, a chagrinned Gretchen chuckled, “Oh! Excuse me! That was not necessarily for broadcast.” Looking into the camera as if at her hubby, she fervently declared, “I love you, Honey! Happy Valentine’s Day!” Turning to Brian, she laughed, “Suddenly, this segment’s taking a totally different turn.”

As the segment ended, Gretchen remarked, “Everyone is going to have a good Valentine’s Day except for me now….I hope he’s still sleeping!” Trying to make it up to her man, she explained, “He is a fantastic husband…We, we met on a blind date. It was love at first sight–on the third date!”

“Casey at bat”: With Gretchen, he was “close” but he didn’t strike out!

*Fox & Friends – 02/14/13 (@ 6:23 a.m. ET)

Aly: “Tucker Carlson Here with Us, of Course!”

Unless Bill Shine rolls the dice again. Perhaps, no more needed to be said by Fox & Friends Weekend “regular” co-host Alisyn Camerota. For Tucker Carlson, the Daily Caller co-founder, who made his debut on F&FW as a FNC contributor almost four years ago, it seems that the die is cast: I.e., Alisyn Camerota, queen of the F&FW curvy couch, signaled strongly today that Tucker is indeed erstwhile F&FW co-anchor Dave Briggs‘ permanent replacement.

Almost a month ago, F&FW‘s “After the Show Show” producers appeared to hint that Tucker would replace the recently departed Dave Briggs as the new F&FW co-host when they presented a brief A.S.S. intro of him: During that program, Aly and guest co-anchor Mike Jerrick strongly suggested that Tucker would be the F&FW co-host in the new year 2013. Moreover, approximately, three weeks ago, Aly indicated that Tucker was being “hazed” as a “new co-host” when he haplessly was the “coughing victim” during an F&FW “Fighting the Flu” segment. Furthermore, about two weeks ago, Tucker seemed to be given equal status with Aly and co-anchor Clayton Morris as a F&FW chryon introduced the three as a apparent team at the start of each hour. Last weekend, when Tucker and Aly were off (and subbed for by Mike Jerrick and Anna Kooiman, respectively), it appeared that Tucker may have simply been co-host of the month (January 2013) to the author: However, Aly seemed to try to put that thought to rest today when she introduced her two co-hosts in the second hour, saying, “Mike Jerrick in for Clayton. Tucker Carlson here with us, of course!“*

Caveat: Tucker has not been added to the Fox & Friends Weekend website profiles alongside Aly and Clayton nor has he been included as an FNC “On-Air Personalities: All Anchors & Reporters.” Perhaps, Bill Shine, FNC’s Executive VP of Programming, may want to roll again if the reserved, awkward Tucker is not well received by F&FW fans. Or, perhaps, if Aly is allowed to leave the ship that she has saved for bluer waters, e.g., F&F weekday (if Gretchen Carlson gets her own FNC gig or her contract is not renewed) and Shine decides to start afresh–again.

*Fox & Friends Weekend – 02/09/13 (@ 7:32 a.m. ET)

Gretchen’s Joke Falls Flat: “Can You Hear Me?”

Brian: “Yeah, I can.” Today, Fox & Friends co-host Gretchen Carlson ribbed her co-anchor Brian Kilmeade about “one of [his] favorite spies…Anna Chapman“–and Brian was not amused. So much so that he ignored Gretchen–to her chagrin. And, the former Miss America is not fond of such a lese-majeste: But, today, she had to sit back on her curvy couch “throne” and brook it.

Mid-show this morn, as producers ran footage of Victoria’s Secret models saucily sashaying down the catwalk and sexily posing for the camera, Gretchen read the headline story entitled, “‘Don’t Be a Plain Jane’: Feds Train Workers to Improve Their Looks” (re a DIA presentation encouraging female employees to don makeup, wear skirts, and paint their nails).  Segueing to a split-screen Brian (co-anchoring from the Big Easy post Super Bowl), Gretchen jested, “Now, Brian, I know that…one of your favorite spies ever was Anna Chapman from Russia. And, she tended to dress up in a skirt, makeup, and used probably some nail polish.”

As Gretchen spoke, Brian, frowning, looked straight ahead at the camera. When Gretchen had finished, Brian looked down at his notes instead of replying. Befuddled at his non-response, Gretchen asked, “Can you hear me?” Looking up without a smile, Brian replied, “Yeah, I can. I, I just never fell for her, her trap. I do believe there is a bigger story there and you know that.”  Embarrassed, Gretchen gulped hard, pursed her lips, and nodded her head repeatedly. With a slight smile, Brian continued,” And, everyone just because she’s hot and has a nice body people kind of fell for it. But, I believe the Russians are still here.”

Russians? Yesteryear, they were red: Today, Gretchen was.

Fox & Friends – 02/04/13 – 7:37 a.m. ET

Brian “Kill-mead”: Governor “Bobby Kindel”

Sandra Lee’s special sauce at fault? Fox & Friends co-host Brian Kilmeade imbibed the New Orleans experience, perhaps, too literally this morning. During an F&F Sandra Lee Super Bowl snack segment at the New Orleans Convention Center this morning, Brian sampled Lee’s Bloody Mary, perhaps, as a “hair of the dog” delight after his foray onto Bourbon Street last night. Subsequently–or consequently, he thereafter mangled Lee’s apparent sponsor LG TV calling it LD TV. Not surprisingly, Lee responded by giving him apt grief for his gaffe: Furthermore, when Brian tossed back to his co-anchors, Steve Doocy ribbed him all the more about his drinking and his faux pas.

Obviously, a good swig of demon rum will not normally muddle one’s mind. However, Brian seemed to be suffering from some  lingering effect this afternoon before his interview of Louisiana’s governor, Bobby Jindal. Tweeting from outside the gubernatorial abode, Brian declared, “Heading in to gov mansion to intv Bobby Kindel @foxandfriends http://yfrog.com/mg4ybqsj.” After getting ribbed by his Tweeps about his obvious error (including the author), Brian did not respond: Rather, once the interview had concluded, he generically Tweeted, “Great 25 min with the Governor. Could not have been more upbeat and optimistic @foxandfriends http://yfrog.com/kj3wpuhj.”

Guess Governor Jindal pardoned Brian for his lese-majeste in the spirit of Mardi Gras. Laissez les bons temps rouler!

[Author’s aside: “Kill-mead” is a not so subtle reference to the preferred intoxicant enjoyed in Beowulf.]