Archive for the ‘Kimberly Guilfoyle’ Category

Perino Goes Pe-loco?

June 18, 2015

Dana accuses her Five co-host Eric Bolling of shady ethics? In a made-for-TV moment yesterday, FNC Five co-host Dana Perino became unhinged as she attacked her co-host Eric Bolling over his defense of the latest entrant to the GOP presidential race, Donald Trump. The caustic exchange left Dana glowering into the camera and a non-too-amused Eric shaking his head at her.

Dana, W’s self-professed number one fan, may just have to recuse herself from the Five for the duration of the election if she is not too careful. The former White House press secretary of President George W. Bush, apparently, can not brook the thought of any unconventional Republican standing in the way of W’s little brother Jeb!‘s ascension to the throne. Approximately, two weeks ago, she was proclaiming that Jeb! basher Senator Rand Paul had “jumped the shark” and appeared gleeful to shiv this libertarian rival on the O’Reilly Factor: Today, she was happy to wield the mace to go at Eric and, by extension, Jeb!’s lastest critic, The Donald.

Actually, it was humorous in a schadenfreude fashion. In the “A block” yesterday [FNC vid], Dana seemed genuinely outraged that co-anchor Kimberly Guilfoyle and Eric would take the flamboyant billionaire seriously, especially, as to his saying he would build a southern border wall and make Mexico pay it.

In her “A block” segment, Kimberly said that Trump was adopting the “Walmart/Kmart approach” by getting the U.S. to “charge everybody for everything” to “make a profit in America”: Chiming in, Eric endorsed The Donald’s take on getting tough on Mexico (among other countries) and said that he was making the other candidates think. In response, Dana was aghast: Haltingly, she sputtered, “I don’t know what to say.”

Derisively, Dana remarked, “I understand…[that]…it feels good to hear that a President of the United States is going to bring back all of our jobs from China and Japan [but] it is so divorced from reality. As Eric turned toward her, she seemingly took a shot at him, saying, “I think you got to take this more seriously: At least, I do! And, I, I’m surprised at some of the people who actually think that some of this would work, especially, given that their other positions are that, for example, executive actions are not something that we should have; we should not have an imperial Presidency.”

Subsequently, co-hosts Greg Gutfeld and Juan Williams gave their takes, respectively, reducing Trump to an exemplar of hubris and showmanship. When Eric came to Trump’s defense, Juan rejoined, “If you’re a serious Republican, do you think that you are helped with him by having him on the same stage with you?” Eric exclaimed, “Yes! No, no: I don’t think you’re helped personally but I think the America people are helped because now they have to address some of the things that Donald Trump addresses that these guys [other candidates] don’t want to talk about.”

Jumping in, Dana scornfully asked, “[D]o you actually think that…the moderator [in a GOP debate] should say, ‘Mr. Rubio, Trump says that he is going to bring back all of the jobs from China: How do you respond?’ And, like all of the candidates are supposed to respond to that!” Then she snarked, “How actually is Donald Trump’s [sic] going to bring all of the jobs from China!”

Subsequently, turning to Eric, Dana acerbically queried, “How would you answer…’how you would bring all the jobs back from China?'” Eric replied, “First of all, I don’t that Donald ever said that he would bring back all of the jobs from China: But, he, he certainly would bring back some of the jobs from China.”

Outraged at Eric’s impertinence, Dana shouted, “He said it in his speech yesterday!” Accusatorily, she stuttered, “no, th, th, that, covering up for him is actually wrong! And, I understand that you have a deal that you’re trying to work on with him. I saw the Twitter last night! I just don’t see how that’s how any other journalist would be pandering.”

Incredulous, Eric replied, “I don’t know what you’re talking about!”

Pointing her finger at Eric, Dana riposted, “Well, you said that you’ve been trying to close the deal for years to be on Celebrity Apprentice!”

As Greg cackled in the background, Eric replied, “Oh, my god, Dana!…I have been friendly with Donald Trump for fifteen years!” Scowling, Dana answered, “You’re the one who was shouting it from the rooftop yesterday!” Agitated all the more, Eric asked, “Are you actually saying that you are going to accuse me of saying that Donald Trump has some good ideas that are resonating with America because I want to be on Celebrity Apprentice?  Please tell me that’s not the case!”

Glowering at Eric, Dana barked, “I am saying that!”

In reply, Eric snapped, “I will tell you unequivocally that is not the case! I can’t be on Celebrity Apprentice anyway: I’m a host at Fox News. I’m not allowed to!…Seven years ago, Donald Trump came to Fox and said, Hey! Can he be on it? And, the boss said, ‘no he can’t!'”

Defending Eric’s honor, Kimberly chimed in saying, “He did ask!”

Still enraged at Dana’s slight, Eric exclaimed, “By the way, by the way, Dana, Dana, Dana, I have way more ethics…than to use this platform which I love!” When Kimberly tried to wrap her segment to end the acrimony, Eric sharply answered, “Stop!” Finishing his point, he said, “I love dearly this Five: I do! I was here from day one, and I hope to be day last!”

Caustically, Dana interrupted, “Oh, guess what! So was I!”

Ending the segment, Kimberly exclaimed, “I’ve had enough! Go to your rooms!”

Clearly ticked, Eric uttered, “Wow!”

As the final shot ended, an angry Dana glowered anew and a miffed Eric shook his head.

Calling into question Eric’s ethics, Dana? Wow! President George W. Bush, this is not your dad’s “kinder and gentler” FNC.

[Author’s aside: After the Five yesterday, Trump Tweeted, “Dear @kimguilfoyle, Thank you so much for your nice words today on @TheFive. Will not be forgotten!” The author has a feeling that Dana’s words may not be forgotten either.]

Outnumbered Turns One: Sexy Fun Facts

May 4, 2015

Fans may have missed about Andrea, Kimberly, and Ainsley. Friday, the Outnumbered co-host hotties featured fun, frisky moments from their inaugural year in a highlight reel: Today, Carpe Diem adds a few sexy memorable facts for the delectable dames’ devotees.

Outnumbered‘s lovely ladies (Andrea Tantaros, Kirsten Powers, Harris Faulkner, and Sandra Smith) Friday celebrated their favorites moments, including what saucy Andrea thinks of when she tries on her swimsuits for the very first time; how a married Harris checks outs a good-looking guy; why one HAS to marry an alluring Ainsley Earhardt; who comely Kirsten Powers thinks is hot; and which heated host was in Janet Jackson‘s Black Cat video–in a cage.

Carpe Diem remembers other sexy fun facts from the gorgeous gals: Andrea racily revealed that she sleeps in the nude;* Kimberly Guilfoyle coquettishly admitted that she was once a Victoria’s Secret model and that she still has “great lingerie” that she models at home;** and Ainsley blushingly disclosed that a certain ex had cheated on her and confidently added, “It was all good; it’s for the best; now I’m married to an amazing guy!“***

Happy anniversary, Outnumbered beauties!

*Outnumbered – 07/02/14 (@ 12:58 p.m. ET).

**Outnumbered – 09/01/14 (@ 12:55 p.m. ET).

***Outnumbered – 11/24/14 (@ 12:58 p.m. ET).

Dash’s Afternoon Delight: “PILF”?

February 23, 2015

Stacey: I wasn’t kicking [him out of bed]. The Five guest co-host Stacey Dash may be conservative but she seems to have a soft spot for probable Democratic candidate Hillary Clinton’s hubby. Recently, on Outnumbered, she racily posited that if Hillary were elected President that Bill’s title should be “PILF.”

In a segment Friday (on the Clinton Foundation fundrasing), she upped the ante (during a segment on Hillary’s possible problems re Clinton Foundation fundraising). When Five co-host Juan Williams mused that supporters of potential Hillary opponent, Elizabeth Warren, would wonder what Hillary was doing in bed with all of the big money companies, Five co-anchor Greg Gutfeld jested, “It should be interesting: She’s in bed with the companies, and Bill’s in bed with the company.”* Turning to Stacey, Juan joked, “No. But Stacey’s kicking him out of bed! Oh, no, no, that was Obama!”  Shaking her head no, Stacey smiling responded, “I wasn’t kicking [Bill out of bed].

Chuckling naughtily, Five co-anchor Kimberly Guilfoyle chimed in, “Clinton will be knocking at the door!”

*The Five – 02/21/15 (@ 5:24 p.m. ET).

Hasselbeck: I’m Still Here!

November 11, 2014

“Ever thankful to be a part of @foxandfriends.” Today, Fox & Friends co-host Elisabeth Hasselbeck set the record straight: She’s still the queen of the curvy couch–no matter what fans of her recent fill-ins Anna Kooiman, Ainsley Earhart, or Kimberly Guilfoyle may want.

Seizing the opportunity that every holiday affords the Twitter user to say whatever is foremost in her mind, Elisabeth proclaimed, “Ever Thankful to be a part of @foxandfriends and @FoxNews Family – where every day is #VeteransDay #ThankYouVeterans #USA.” In other words, I support the veterans and what they have sacrificed for me and the nation, AND I am still in the center seat on the curvy couch, girlfriends–and viewers.

Even the Fox & Friends fan who can barely stomach Elisabeth’s priggish paean to The View by constantly dubbing her co-anchors, Steve Doocy and Brian Kilmeade, “brothers” (vis-a-vis a more randy approach a la E. D. Hill or Gretchen Carlson) should root for Elisabeth’s speedy recover from the surgery that she had about a month ago. However, they can be forgiven for wondering why Elisabeth has taken her time returning to the vaunted curvy couch. Approximately a month ago (October 15), Steve announced, “In case, you were wondering where Elisabeth is today…she had some surgery yesterday and she’s going to be out for a couple of weeks, and Brian reassuringly remarked, “In a short time, she’ll be back on the set.”

Happy Veterans Day indeed to those who have served this great country and her citizens! And, get well soon, Elisabeth!

Doocy: Elizabeth “Had Some Surgery”

October 15, 2014

“She’s going to be out for a couple of weeks.” Where has Elisabeth Hasselbeck been? Today, Fox & Friends co-host Steve Doocy revealed the reason for his co-anchor’s disappearance this morning. However, he was not fully forthcoming.

After welcoming The Five co-host Kimberly Guilfoyle to the center seat on the curvy couch, Steve disclosed the secret of Elisabeth’s absence to the F&F audience, saying, “In case, you were wondering where Elisabeth is today and this week, well, she had some surgery yesterday and she’s going to be out for a couple of weeks.”* Reassuringly, he added, “But, she’s doing just fine [and] she’s on the mend.”

Chiming in, F&F co-anchor Brian Kilmeade elaborated, “But, as you know if you watch the show, she is strong, she is tough, and a better athlete than me. We heard from her last night and she said she is feeling good: So, in a few, in a short time, she’ll be back on the set.”

Notably, neither Steve nor Brian revealed the nature of Elisabeth’s surgery. Perhaps, they both are waiting on Elisabeth herself to do so if, in fact, she decides to do so. Nevertheless, her fans doubtlessly wish the new queen of the F&F curvy couch a full recovery and a swift return.

*Fox & Friends – 10/15/14 (@ 6:01 a.m. E.T.).

Unlike Kilmeade, Eric Mans Up: Apologizes

September 26, 2014

Bolling: “When I got home, I got the look!” Greta was right: Did The Five co-host Eric Bolling ever “get into so much trouble” for dismissing the ISIS-bombing U.A.E.’s first female fighter pilot as “Boobs on the ground” in a Five segment Wednesday! And, yesterday, he “manned” up and apologized for his offensive jest.

After Eric’s Five co-anchor Kimberly Guilfoyle introduced the “One More Thing” segment, she called on him immediately. Looking straight into the camera, Eric remarked, “Okay, for my ‘One More Thing’ tonight, I want to go back to yesterday: About this time, I made a joke. When I got home, I got the look–and realized [that] some people didn’t think it was funny at all: I said sorry to my wife, and I apologize to all of you as well.” For emphasis, he added, “I just want to make that very clear!”

If Eric’s apology were not very clear, Kimberly added, “And, you love women, and you have respect for them.” Chastened, Eric concurred, “And, I do.”

Kudos, Eric! Kilmeade could learn from you.

Eric & Greg: “Boobs on the Ground”?

September 25, 2014

Greta: “Ouch! Oh, man!…They’re going to get into so much trouble over that one!”* Yesterday, The Five co-anchor Kimberly Guilfoyle saluted a true “femme fatale,” U.A.E. ace Major Mariam Al Mansouri (during the “One Last Thing” segment): The U.A.E.’s first female pilot, who serves as squadron leader, led the American/Arab air strikes as she and the boys wreaked havoc on ISIS on the Syrian front. Instead of celebrating the Major in a part of the world where a woman sometimes cannot even drive and oft has to hide behind a burka, Kimberly’s co-hosts, Greg Gutfeld and Eric Bolling, acting like puerile, pubescent schoolboys, took cheap misogynistic shots.

After Kimberly had lauded Mansouri a/k/a “Lady Liberty” for “raining hell down on ISIS,” Greg jejunely jested, “The problem is after she bombed it, she, she couldn’t park it.” Chuckling, a less than clever Eric punned, “Would that be considered ‘boobs on the ground’ or no?” As Kimberly looked down in incredulity, even the ever bawdy co-anchor Bob Beckel looked on in disbelief, exclaiming, “Did you just say what I thought you said!””

“Boobs on the ground,” Eric? No, just boobs on The Five. And, not the nice kind.

[Author’s aside: The subtitle, supra, refers to the final segment on On the Record with Greta Van Susteren last night: As the show concluded, Greta remarked, “And, live TV, well it can be unpredictable like the discussion on The Five today about the U.A.E.’s first fighter pilot bombing ISIS. Ouch!” After playing the clip of The Five segment describing the aforementioned juvenile exchanges, Greta remarked, “Oh, man! Do you think that the gents on The Five minus Bob should get a do-over on that one? They’re going to get into so much trouble over that one!”]

Kimberly’s Boy: “Booby Alert”

June 24, 2014

Tucker: “He sounds awesome!” Today, Outnumbered co-host Kimberly Guilfoyle reminded red-blooded lads why they should tune in to Fox News. In a segment on politically correct summer camps that prohibit campers from talking about physical appearance, co-anchor Harris Faulkner posited that the more one tells young people not to talk about it, the more they are going to want to do so: Concurring, comely Kimberly replied, “Well, that’s the problem! You don’t won’t to highlight it.”*

Elaborating, Kimberly remarked, “I got a kid. He loves the “Fox News Alert” but he’s changed it up a little bit: So, in the morning he wakes up [and he says], “Mommy, this is a Booby Alert! And, I’m like, okay, let’s just relax; let’s drink some water; [and] try to calm down for a second.”

Smiling broadly, an amused Harris animatedly queried, “How old is he?” Chuckling heartily, Kimberly answered, “He’s seven! And, he’s just funny: he’s a personality.” Interjecting, an appreciative co-host Tucker Carlson exclaimed, “He sounds awesome!”

Perhaps, sharing a mite too much, Kimberly added, “And, then he dances in front of the mirror naked:  he’s like ‘feast your eyes on this!”

Chuckling, Tucker jested, “Where did he get that?”

Hm. Where indeed, Kimberly!

*Outnumbered – 06/24/14 (@ 12:41 p.m. ET)

Outnumbered: Outmanned?

April 30, 2014

Girls, girls, girls: “You just submit from the first moment!” Fox News beauties Harris Faulkner, Sandra Smith, Kimberly Guilfoyle, and Jedediah Bila kicked off their inaugural show Outnumbered with token troglodyte Tucker Carlson of Fox & Friends Weekend fame Monday.

As FNC’s femme fatale showcase started, Sandra introduced the “big reveal” Tucker and Harris revealed that he lived with a lot of women: Chuckling,the #OneLuckyGuy du jour remarked, “I live with exactly this number four: So, this is like dinner at my house. Yes, I’m in a defensive crouch already.” Cocking her head jauntily, Sandra queried, “So, how does it feel to sit in the hot seat, Tucker? He laughed, “Well, you just submit from the first moment: you already give up. So, if you begin at that point, you can’t lose!”

And, for the most part, Tucker did just that. But, to keep the boys watching FNC’s “View,” Tucker took the view of most adolescent boys when it came to a sexy teacher who allegedly gave one of her fifteen-year-old male students a lap dance for his birthday in class. Introducing his segment, Tucker riantly remarked, “I think [that] legitimate opinion divides whether this was appropriate for the classroom or not.”* As his female co-hosts looked at him in utter disbelief, he declared, “There are people out there who believe that there ought to be criminal sanctions brought against this woman. And, I think that’s deranged because…there’s no victim here!”

Outnumbered: But, not outmanned! Tucker: Boys will be boys! The ladies were almost in control!

[Author’s aside: More estrogen friendly, Brian Kilmeade was the boy in the middle the following day and today. His only guy gaffe: caviling over whether cheerleading was a sport or not.]

*Outnumbered – 04/28/14 (12:49 p.m. ET).

Five’s Beckel: Hey, Gum This, Andrea Tantaros!

August 28, 2013

Kimberly Guilfoyle: “Bob…do you know what you just said!” Today, The Five unfiltered co-host Bob Beckel took his hyper-sexual schtick to a whole new level–at the expense of his co-anchor Andrea Tantaros. When the Greek beauty tried to conclude her segment timely this afternoon (on the “Red Line in Syria”) and tease the next block, Bob babbled on: Seemingly irritated at his puerile solipsism, Andrea chided, “Bob, as my tenth grade biology teacher used to say, ‘Give the gums a rest!'”* Unrepentant, Bob bawdily riposted, “Hey, gum this!”

As a smiling Andrea tried to gamely soldier on in her segue, her aghast off-camera co-host Kimberly Guilfoyle exclaimed, “Terrible! Terrible!” Aptly, pricking the priapic Philistine further, she added, “Bob, I mean, do you know what you just said!”

The Five‘s bad boy? Nah, he probably had no clue. Yeah, right!

*The Five – 08/28/13 (@ 5:45 p.m. ET)

Five’s Beckel Unhinged: [Medgar] Evers “Turncoat”

June 19, 2013

Oops! Bob bizarrely loses his civil rights mantle cred. Today, the proud self-proclaimed son of a “liberal who went into the South and was arrested 57 times in the civil rights movement registering blacks” and who marched with Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., evidenced an appalling lack of knowledge when it came to a pivotal chapter in the nations history. During a segment on black Louisiana state senator Elbert Guillory who changed from the Democratic party to the GOP, Beckel tried to impugn him by trying to recall another black Louisiana “turncoat.” Unfortunately, for Bob, it backfired on him, his co-hosts, and The Five.

In the Five block moderated by co-host Kimberly Guilfoyle,* Bob tried to push-back when his more conservative co-hosts, Kimberly, Eric Bolling, and Greg Gutfeld appeared to defend Guillory’s decision. Looking down, Beckel declared, “Louisiana has had a long history–and I wish [that] I could remember the name of this guy whose brother was a very well known civil rights activist who was I think a Congressman. And, this guy converted to the Republican Party because he was paid to convert to the Republican Party to sift off the votes from the Democrats.”

After further discussion with his conservative co-hosts (including Dana Perino) of Guillory, Bob errantly announced, “I just remembered the name of the guy who was, his brother became a turncoat.”

Derisively, Kimberly enjoined, “[‘C]ause the control room gave it to you in your ear?”

Struggling mightily, Bob stammered, “Megan, Meg, Megan, Malcolm Evers’ brother, Charles Evers’ brother, Malcolm…got, got paid money to go on the Republican Party to sift off votes the Democrat.”

To make matters even worse, when Greg asked, “Were you bringing, why, to denigrate this man’s brave,” Bob declared, “I didn’t deny what this guy’s, what he was saying but Louisiana has a history of doing this. They have a history of doing it!”

Unfortunately, Bob’s bluster ruled the day on the Five. Perhaps, just as embarrassing or even more so, none of his co-anchors nor F&F‘s vaunted control room challenged his addled version of the civil rights struggle–in Mississippi!

Clearly, a muddled Bob was referring to the Mississippi civil rights martyr Medgar Evers and his activist older brother Charles Evers. It was Medgar who died at the hands of Byron Beckwith for the cause in June 11, 1963, and Charles who took his place as field secretary of the MS NAACP. Subsequently, Charles became the mayor of Fayette in 1963 (and the NAACP’s “Man of the Year”); a gubernatorial candidate; a U.S. Senate candidate: And, in 1989, Charles switched his allegiance to the GOP.

Today in Bob’s world, Louisiana and Mississippi looked alike: “Megan” Evers, “Malcolm” Evers, Charles Evers, Medgar Evers were all one and the same, too. Not quite the civil rights account of which Bob’s Dad would be rightly proud. Nor should Bob, his co-hosts, or The Five suits.

*The Five – 06/19/13 (@ 5:38 p.m. ET)

Sexy Kimberly Guilfoyle’s “Basic Instinct”

June 15, 2013

Juan Williams: “Wait! Wait! You’re distracting him!” Saucy Kimberly Guilfoyle scored on more than a few levels with her Five co-hosts and fans in her “bowdlerized” Basic Instinct display of last week. As Kimberly revealed her dominance in b’ball on Friday (06/07/13), she brought “rowwr power” to a whole new level.

In the Five segment designed to showcase the co-anchors shot-making prowess–or lack thereof (a la toddler Titus Ashby’s shellacking of Shaq on Jimmy Kimmel) co-hosts Kimberly, Juan, Eric Bolling, Andrea Tantaros and fill-in Brian Kilmeade took turns at throwing mini-basketballs at a small toy goal.* Starting off their friendly rivalry to see who could score the most points in twenty seconds, Brian supplied several balls to Kimberly. As the short-skirted lovely began to lob them at the basket with much success, Brian scurried to and fro to deliver them back to San Francisco’s comely former first lady.

Clapping enthusiastically, an adoring Juan exclaimed, “Yeah, Kimberly! Oh! Oh! Go, Kimberly, go! Rack ’em up!” As Kimberly eagerly scrambled for the balls and gave viewers and Brian a PG-rated Basic Instinct, she was given more than double the time that she had been actually allotted. As Kimberly began to score with alacrity, literally and figuratively, Five rival beauty Andrea exclaimed, “Who’s keeping score?”

Subsequently, an apparently addled Juan threw more than a few air balls in his ill-fated attempt to match Kimberly. When former Pittsburg Pirate draftee Eric Bolling tried to get his “game on,” comely Kimberly kicked her right gam up Rockette-style. Pointing to his gorgeous colleague, an ardent Juan declared, “Wait! Wait! You’re distracting him! You can’t kick your legs to distract him!”

Apparently, Kimberly must have done so. As Eric completed his feckless effort, Kimberly pulled her hiked skirt back down and raised her hands in triumph, exclaiming, “Oh, yeah! Wooh, hooh!” Subsequently, when Andrea begin her successful distaff attempt, Kimberly shouted, “Go! Girls rule! Yeah!” And, they did.

Futilely, sports guy Brian tried to compete thereafter with little success. When he had finished, he queried, “Do we have a winner, control room?” After the producers seemingly whispered in his ear, Brian declared, “Kimberly and Andrea have tied.” Apparently, abandoning his formerly “so hot” Andrea for the moment, Juan raised Kimberly’s hand high in the air in victory, proclaiming her “the champ.”

Sexy Kimberly Guilfoyle: “The girl [just] can’t help it!”

*The Five – 06/08/13 @5:40 p.m. ET (Saturday re-airing of prior day)

[Author’s aside: Sorry, CR readers for the delay: “Cleaning Out My Closet.”

Dana’s “Foolish Mistake”: Stealing $20 from Mom

May 19, 2013

“I did that once, Mom. Sorry!” The Five co-host Dana Perino admitted Friday that she once had sticky fingers for her mother’s moolah. During a segment on the I.R.S.’s “targeting” of conservative groups during the 2012 campaign period, Dana derided the I.R.S.’s Commissioner’s dismissal of the excessive scrutiny as “foolish mistakes”: Arching her eyebrows, Dana declared, “A foolish mistake is when you take twenty dollars from your Mom’s purse when you really shouldn’t have. That was a foolish mistake.”*

Immediately, co-anchor Kimberly Guilfoyle interjected, “I never did that!”

Pointing to Dana with his right thumb accusingly, co-host Greg Gutfeld responded, “She did.”

Squinting her eyes at Greg with more than a hint of agitation, Dana confessed, “I did that once, Mom. Sorry!”

The Five‘s naif Dana Perino: I’m not that innocent!

*The Five – 05/1 – 05/18/13 (@ 5:12 p.m. ET)

Bob Beckel: “Did the Beeper Work?”

November 14, 2012

[That’s] what I’m really worried about.” B***s***? The Five fell strangely silent today during a “live” segment for approximately eleven seconds–with no explanation.* Displacing its polemic panel, an ominous “The Five” star graphic atop a blue background appeared suddenly onscreen. The ghost of Mrs. Grundy?

During this segment, his segment, co-host Eric Bolling posited that “President Obama a/k/a Mr. Transparent [was] rope-a-dope[ing] the press when asked about the Petraeus affair.” When guest co-anchor K.T. McFarland and co-host Bob Beckel began to debate whether President Obama was availing himself of “plausible deniability,” Eric acerbically interjected, “What you really don’t want is the President of the United States to lie, in fact.” Without warning nor explanation, the audio was muted and the screen went blue (with “The Five” star).

After about twelve seconds had elapsed, The Five co-hosts reappeared seemingly tacitly attesting to the rude interruption: Kimberly Guilfoyle laughed as she hid her face in her left hand; Greg Gutfeld chuckled to himself and looked over at Bob in amusement; K.T.  tried to keep her composure as she looked straight ahead and blinked her eyes rapidly; Bob looked into the distance with his mouth agape; and Eric appeared to try to read the teleprompter with feigned gravity.

After praising the military who stood apart from their perchance rogue rakish leaders, Eric seemed to question the credibility of the sexy socialite Jill Kelly who allegedly ignited the inquery and laughing asked roue Bob if he had ever known such an “honorary consul general.” Looking over at Eric, Bob jested, “What I’m really concerned about is did the beeper work?”

Apparently, loathe to acknowledge that The Five might not be exactly live anymore, Eric monotoned, “Did the beeper work?” Slightly smiling, Bob anwered, “Yeah.” Softly, Kimberly unconvincingly interposed, “No.”

Then, as if a producer had whispered in her ear to change the topic posthaste, Kimberly animatedly stammered, “Listen! The beep, this is a woman that I thing we’re going to learn a lot more about.” Tellingly, Greg glanced at the panel bemusedly, chuckled to himself, and beamed back at someone offset.

In the following segment, Greg appeared to translucently reveal the secret of the censored segment. Re President Obama’s view of whether climate change caused Hurricane Sandy, Greg defiantly declared, “He even admits finally  that that’s baloney–or b.s.!”** As Greg began to address Bob, a chuckling Eric looked up from his papers, exclaiming, “Don’t say it!”

Don’t say it indeed, Bob. At least, on air!

*The Five – 11/14/12 (@ 5:19 a.m. ET).

**Ibid at @ 5:29 a.m. ET.

Apoplectic Bob Beckel: “Free…P*ssy”

August 6, 2012

Eric Bolling: “Let’s move on.” Let’s not: If it were free, The Five co-host Bob Beckel might make for a much less colorful “Smoking Gun” Democratic rogue. But, fear not! The bad boy of FNC can not or will not keeps his wild ways under control.

Less than four months ago, Bob went off with an “f” bomb inadvertently on Hannity. In what he deemed an off-air moment, he lambasted a conservative panelist, saying, “You don’t know what the f**k you’re talking about.” When host Sean Hannity apprised him that they were live, Bob appeared to be in a state of disbelief. Finally, coming to his senses, Bob groused that he was going to be fired after the show.

Bob was not. But, today, he pushed the envelope even further. In a segment including President Barack Obama’s purported disdain for his GOP opponent Mitt Romney (“no g**damned war hero”) as noted by Politico‘s Mike Allen, co-host Eric caustically queried, “Bob, should President Obama be taking shots at Mitt Romney’s military service when…the guy never picked up a gun, pulled the trigger of…blew anyone away? Oh, wait a minute, that’s right, he shot bin Laden, right!”*

After initially calling into question Allen’s assertion, Bob remarked, “Does he [President Obama] not like Mitt Romney?…When he started out, he said [that] he was neutral about Mitt Romney. And, frankly, so was I. I thought he was a nice guy.”

Elaborating, Bob remarked, “I’ve come to believe [that] he is a terrible, uh, a terrible–I won’t say liar because I won’t, because I don’t want to diminish myself down where Republicans [are].

Unfortunately, continuing, a suddenly incoherent Bob stammered, “Or, free, pre p*ssy, for proof of pre pro puss. Excuse me! Pre puss.”

Throwing him a lifeline, Eric mercifully interjected, “Let’s move on.” Bemused, co-anchor Andrea Tantaros beamed broadly and shook her head at Bob latest blooper. Meanwhile, co-host Kimberly Guilfoyle laughed heartily as she hid her face in her hands.

Babbling Bob: a sight to behold–for better or for worse.

*The Five – 08/06/12 (@ 5:07 p.m. ET)

Update: Vid (courtesy of J$P).

Fox & Friends First: “The Four” Now?

July 14, 2012

Patti Ann Brown, Ainsley Earhardt, Heather Childers, and Heather Nauert. Possibly, following in the footsteps of The Five, Fox & Friends First may be whittling down its number of initial hosts. As readers may recall, FNC announced the debut of The Five and listed ten rotating co-anchors including the current seven and Monica Crowley, Geraldo Rivera, and Judge Andrew Napolitano: When the Five celebrated its first anniversary last Monday on Fox & Friends, F&F co-anchor Gretchen Carlson noted that its roster had been pared down to seven (the “Magnificent Seven”), i.e., Greg Gutfeld, Kimberly Guilfoyle, Bob Beckel, Andrea Tantaros, Dana Perino, Juan Williams, and Eric Bolling.

In a similar fashion, Fox & Friends First started its new run in March with a slate of co-hosts that included not only the four that seem to be now predominating F&FF airplay qua anchors, i.e., Patti Ann Brown, Ainsley Earhardt, Heather Childers, and Heather Nauert but also Dave Briggs, Juliet Huddy, Julie Banderas, Anna Kooiman, Clayton Morris, Arthel Neville, and Jamie Colby. Even though the author has heard no new F&FF announcement, it’s website may provide a hint: only Patti Ann, Ainsley, and the two Heathers have their FNC bios listed on the official F&FF website.

Gutfeld & Five Gals: Slap Young “F U” Turk Back?

April 26, 2012

Greg: “Lots of lonely feminist bloggers are trying to ravish me.” Without referring to Young Turks co-host and Examiner.com writer Ana Kasparian by name, Five‘s co-anchor Greg Gutfeld appeared to slap her back yesterday for her caustic “F*** you” comment to him on her show the day before. And, his Five lady co-hosts Dana Perino and Kimberly Guilfoyle had his back.

As Mediaite‘s Tommy Christopher chronicled, Kasparian “took major exception” Tuesday to a Gutfeld joke on the Five last Friday that N.O.W. had outlived its usefulness because women “can shop” now. When she reviewed the Five snippet on her program Tuesday, Kasparian decried Gutfeld’s comment as “sexist” and then acerbically exclaimed, “F*** you!” Apparently, Gutfeld was listening, or perhaps, more likely, read Christopher’s piece (which included the YT vid).

During a Five segment yesterday on the Secret Service Columbian prostitute scandal, co-host Perino referred to the phrase, “Wheels up and rings off” that she (a former Bush White House Press Secretary) used to hear “when we would go on trips.”* In response, Gutfeld jested, “When I travel, I put my wedding ring on because…usually when I go to foreign countries, lots of lonely feminist bloggers are trying to ravish me: And, the only way I can fight them off is by [sic] to tell them that I’m married.” Offering her FNC colleague distaff support, Perino curtly commented, “And, they really don’t have a sense of humor, those ladies!” Joining in the seeming push-back on Kasparian, Guifoyle sneered, “Yeah, they’ve missed a few things recently.”

Rowr! Greg and his Five gal pals: no shrinking violets.

*The Five – 04/25/12 (@ 5:40 a.m. ET)

Kimberly’s “21st Birthday”: Andrea’s 22 Shots!

March 10, 2012

Eric Bolling: “Bubblicious!” The Five co-anchor and former Victoria’s Secret model Kimberly Guilfoyle tried to play the naif Friday as she celebrated her “21st” birthday. But, co-hosts Andrea Tantaros and, yes, Dana Perino proudly let their audience know that they were “not that innocent.” As to the guys, not too surprisingly, Bob Beckel joined in as the bad boy and Eric was the good one.

When The Five returned for their penultimate segment yesterday to a strawberry shortcake birthday cake (Kimberly’s fave) and the Beatle’s “Birthday” tune, Kimberly sexily shimmied in her short red dress seated next to an appreciative Bob, who awkwardly danced along with her. Soon after the music ended, Bob announced Kimberly’s “21st birthday,” kidded her about the “special friend [that she had] brought with [her],” and asked her for her fondest memory of her “first” one. Pulling her hair back sensually, a chagrined Kimberly cooed, “So, listen. I only recently became a lot of fun, Bob: I know you may find this hard to believe.”

Randily, Bob replied, “No, baby, that’s not what I hear.”

Giggling, Kimberly responded, “That’s terrible.” Then, she continued, “But, on my twenty-first birthday, I was at UC, Davis–very nerdy, academic school….I ended up being the designated driver on my twenty-first birthday, and no one objected!…So, there I was with my glasses…so thick [that] I could see into the future. And, I was driving everybody and everyone [else] had a great time.”

Laughing, Bob riposted, “I was the designated drunk on my birthday. That’s why I can’t remember one of them.”

Subsequently, after having Kimberly blow out birthday candles, Bob asked Eric if he remembered what he did on his twenty-first birthday. Soberly, Eric responded, “I, I was knee deep in a baseball season…March of…’84 playing baseball on my way to…making a career out of baseball for a while: So, I probably didn’t celebrate as much as I could have.”

Dismissively, Bob jibed, “Really? Well, that was an interesting story. Okay, Dana?” Furrowing her eyebrows, a chuckling Dana answered, “Mine is not that great. I, it wasn’t like Kimberly where I was the designated driver. But, I just remember [that] I came home from college and there were a bunch of my friends home in Parker, Colorado, and we got together at my parents’ house.” With, a seemingly feigned nonchalance, she added, “And, I think, I guess we probably went to a bar. I don’t really, I don’t remember. It wasn’t that memorable.”

When Bob asked Andrea for her anecdote, she rhetorically queried, “So, I’m, apparently, the only one who had a great twenty-first birthday?” Smiling slightly, She remarked, “I don’t remember all that much. Isn’t that the point of a twenty-first birthday?” Elaborating, she said, “I went to a place called the Crocodile Rocks–classy, classy. My sister, who always wants to go out with me–my birthday is December 30th–so no one ever wants to go out on the 30th ’cause they don’t won’t to ruin themselves for New Year. Not my sister, though. She says, ‘We’re going to Crocodile Rocks [and] we’re inviting all your friends.” And, I did twenty-two shots.”

Amazed, Kimberly exclaimed, “No, you didn’t!” Shamelessly, Andrea answered, “I puked at sixteen but I did make it to twenty-two. As incredulous Kimberly rejoined, “How did you live through that? Are you serious?, Dana interjected, “But, why twenty-two?”  Chuckling, Andrea explained, “One for good luck. And, look where it brought me!”

Not to be outdone by Andrea, a rambling Bob replied, “I got to tell you. The only reason I remember that far back on my twenty-first birthday [is that] I was in the hospital the night of my twenty-first birthday because I got drunk and I was walking out of a bar and I fell over a bunch of garbage cans that had glass in them and I cut myself a little bit. That wasn’t so bad except that I rolled in it for fun and then I went to the hospital. But, I was okay….But, I don’t remember much of it.”

Subsequently, wrapping up Kimberly’s birthday segment, Bob asked his co-hosts for one word to describe the birthday babe. Eric exclaimed, “Bubblicious!” Dana chimed, “Sweet,” and Andrea answered, “Fun.” Perhaps, just a little jealous of Kimberly “special friend” off cam, a seemingly smitten Bob stammered, “Unbelievable, Baby! Yeah, no, really, you’re great. You’re wonderful….We love you and, and I know other people do, too, here in the building.” Knowingly, Kimberly chuckled, “A couple!”

Five fun: 21, 22, and Kimberly’s “couple.”

“Jackie” Guilfoyle: This Is So Inappropriate!

November 15, 2011

 Gutfeld: “Kimberly, how many times did [Bill Clinton] ask you out on a date?” The Five co-host Kimberly Guilfoyle was not amused with her co-anchor Greg Gutfeld‘s final interrogatory about her love life during their program Friday. At the start of the show, Greg kidded the former Victoria’s Secret model about her former Camelot hubby, San Francisco mayor Gavin Newsom; subsequently, at the middle mark of the program, he teased her about allegedly being hit on by Julia Louis-Dreyfus’ wealthy father; and, then, ten minutes later, he freshly asked, “Kimberly, how may times did he [Bill Clinton] ask you out on a date? Smiling uncomfortably at his latest dig, Kimberly retorted, “This is so inappropriate! What is this?”

Perhaps, Red Eye‘s Greg just being Greg? As Kimberly moderated the “A” Block with a story on Richmond (CA) mayor Gayle McLaughlin‘s skipping a Veterans’ Day event for an “OWS” rally, she jibed, “Greg, you’re from the Bay Area. What do you have to say for yourself?”* Sighing with a smile, Greg replied, “Nice, very good. Didn’t expect that from you.” After ripping the liberal McLaughlin, Greg remarked, “Something about the Bay Area and mayors, Kimberly: I won’t get into it….Where do they get them from–the San Francisco zoo, the cast of Godspell? Grinning, Kimberly guffawed, “This is getting rough!” Sympathetically, co-host Andrea Tantaros interposed, “And, very personal!” Concurring, Kimberly added, “Yes. And, it’s getting weird and awkward!”

Subsequently, at the bottom of the hour, Greg introduced a story on the Canadian/American pipeline delay. After airing a video of Seinfeld actress Julia Louis-Dreyfus impugning President Obama for letting Big Oil continue to run the show, Greg told The Five panel and the audience that her family ran the approximately four-billion-dollar Dreyfus Group that “deals in U.S. and European markets in criminal oil.”**  After replying that the company was actually worth $3.8 billion, Kimberly cooed, “My response is [that] her father is a very, very nice man. Elegant, charming–I will say that. And, obviously, very rich.” Every the wag, Greg riposted, “Yeah, so, obviously, he hit on you!” As the other Five co-hosts laughed, a blushing Kimberly hid her head in her hands: Looking at Greg, she implored, “So, what’s going on with you?” Less than convincingly, an amused Greg answered, “I’m sorry.”

In the following “E” block, the co-anchors discussed an Obama-bashing Karl-Rove-group-sponsored “Two Presidents, Two Visions” ad. When it was Greg’s turn, he joked, “The most important question here when we’re talking about Bill Clinton–Kimberly, how many times did he ask you out on a date?” Reddening anew, Kimberly replied, “This is so inapprop[riate]! What is this? What’s going on at that end of the table?” Laughing, Greg riposted, “Answer! Answer the question.” Shaking her head, Kimberly retorted, “I’m not answering any question like this!” Turning to Kimberly, guest co-host Juan Williams declared, “Now, see, you just legitimized this whole thing. I thought [that] he was joking. Now, you communicate that this is serious.”

Throwing Kimberly a life line, Andrea declared, “Alright, I’ve got to save my girl….I just want to know how many times Bill Clinton asked you out, Greg?” Grateful, Kimberly chimed, “Yeah!” Waggishly, Greg retorted, “I’m not his type!”

So inappropriate? So The Five. And, so FNC!

*The Five – 11/15/11 (@ 5:01 a.m. ET)

**Ibid at @ 5:32 a.m. ET.

***Ibid at @ 5:41 a.m. ET.

Guilfoyle: My Catholic School Girl Outfit

October 25, 2011

Perino: No, not doing it. No! Rowr! Yesterday The Five‘s co-host Kimberly Guilfoyle scared her more Victorian co-anchor Dana Perino with her sexy selections of Halloween costumes. But, not surprisingly, she sent a thrill up the legs of her rakish male co-anchors, Greg Gutfeld, Bob Beckel, and Eric Bolling.

In the final The Five block, the co-hosts discussed two New Jersey schools that had banned students from wearing Halloween garb on the holiday. After Kimberly and Dana dissed the odd decisions, Greg goatishly interjected, “By the way, Kimberly, what…did you normally wear? Smiling seductively and pumping her hands as if they held pom poms, she answered, “I was a Notre Dame cheerleader. I still have the outfit and the pom poms!”

Seduced by their favorite former Victoria’s Secret model, Kimberly’s male co-anchors were enraptured. Priapically, Beckel queried, “Did you have a short skirt?” Grinning randily, Greg demanded, “You got to wear it on Halloween. You have to wear it this Friday.” Equally enamored, co-host Eric Bolling interjected, “This is a very important discussion topic we’ve been having. Are we going to wear Halloween costumes on Monday Halloween? Yes or no?”

Clearly enjoying the heightened testosterone that she had engendered, a beaming Kimberly chuckled. Meanwhile, perhaps, overly exercised, Beckel began to cough repeatedly. Turning to him with a smile, Kimberly teased, “Bob needs mouth-to-mouth again. Are you okay?”

Later, as the segment ended, Eric declared, “Email us at The Five. Tell us what you’d like each one of us, what costume each one of us…should wear.” Prudishly, Dana interjected, “No, not doing it! No!” As both Beckel and Greg enthusiastically agreed with Eric and the camera began to pan away, Kimberly provocatively concluded, “I could wear my Catholic school girl one!”

The Five‘s Halloween: as Glenn Frey once said, “the heat is on.”


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