Huddy & PAB: “Simply the Best”?

The girls are back in town! Former Fox & Friends First co-hosts Juliet Huddy and Patti Ann Browne opened their old show to the inimitable Tina Turner’s “Simply the Best” this morning. As current F&FF co-hosts Ainsley Earhardt and Heather Childers took the holidays off, it was an amusing start to the day after Christmas for F&FF fans.

As the reader may recall, F&FF (this iteration) debuted almost two years ago (March 5, 2012) with Ainsley and Anna Kooiman at the helm (vid) as nine other rotating co-anchors (i.e., Heather C., Heather Nauert, PAB, Juliet, Arthel Neville, Jamie Colby, Julie Banderas, Dave Briggs, and Clayton Morris) stood at the ready for their shifts. However, on its one-year anniversary, Ainsley signaled that the F&FF co-hosts had been pared to four: She, the two Heathers, and PAB had survived the cut. Approximately, six months later, FNC whittled the number down to two, namely, Ainsley and Heather Childers: TV Newser rather charitably reported that FNC had chosen the two as the “permanent anchors” of F&FF.

But, today, Juliet and PAB had their revenge at Ainsley and Heather Childers’ expense as producers, wittingly or not, committed a lese-majeste, declaring the fresh Jersey girl and Red Eye‘s “notorious PAB” “simply the best [better than all the rest].” Of course, Ainz and Heather C. are scheduled to return to rule their roost soon. And, if the sages are right, she who laughs last laughs best.

F&FF: Ringing in the New Year with feline fireworks? If so, it should be fun! Rowrr!

Proud Anna [Kooiman]: “Nice and Rough”?

“‘Nice and easy’: I’d like to do that for you….But we never, ever do nothing nice and easy: We always do it nice and rough!” Fox & Friends Weekend co-host Anna Kooiman may know how to give up a “booty-shaking” performance [vid] a la Tina Turner as a rocking fitness instructor: But, if she is ever going to rule the F&FW curvy couch, she needs to learn from the “Queen of Rock ‘n’ Roll” not only to translate her youthful enthusiasm and sexy energy into her new FNC gig but also to find a way to infuse her Southern niceness with a little old-time Tina “roughness.”

Too often, on the set with her co-anchors Clayton Morris and Tucker Carlson (and/or Mike Jerrick), Anna seems to embody her beautiful, playful yellow lab Baxter–overly eager to please. She would do well to remember the success of past F&FW “alpha bitches” (e.g., Juliet Huddy, Alisyn Camerota (thrice), Kiran Chetry, and Page Hopkins) and the failure of another nice Carolinian F&FW anchor (Ainsley Earhardt). If Anna hopes ever to rival her predecessor Aly (to whom Clayton bid adieu, saying, “I have never worked with someone in a female capacity on the air who has been just as effortless and fantastic as you”), she must learn not to be cowed by Clayton’s cleverness and Tucker’s intellect (and/or Mike’s deftness).

In other words, don’t be afraid to be an F&FW “alpha bitch,” Anna: Dominate the boys with your smarts, wit, and sensuality.

[Author’s aside: The subtitle, supra, is a quote from Tina Turner’s introduction to her legendary Proud Mary (with her then husband, Ike Turner). As to the inclusion of Mike Jerrick, supra, he seems to be co-hosting F&FW with increasing frequency for the incorrigibly absent Tucker.]

“We Don’t Need Another Hero”

The lyrics of Tina Turner, leggy queen of Southern soul, seem to echo in the minds of McCain’s Republican faithful now. Once again another GOP American war hero is playing second fiddle to his more youthful, charming, and charismatic Dem counterpart. Like World War II veteran Bob Dole, Bill Clinton’s 1996 presidential opponent, John McCain seems to have left his fighting spirit on the battlefield: perhaps, soon he’ll be happy making copious appearances on the talk show circuit and singing the praises of Viagra, too!