Dave: “In Your Bed!”

Fox & Friends Weekend co-host Dave Briggs seemed to take a playful jab at his colleague Clayton Morris and his wife Sara this morning. As Clayton introduced an upcoming segment featuring the “Macho Mattress,” he remarked, “All the guys out there, this is the best thing that’s ever happened to the bedroom!”: Chuckling almost uncontrollably, co-anchor Dave Briggs replied, “Lord help us if it is.” Qualifying his statement in response, Clayton remarked, “Well, it’s one of the best things to ever happen”: Dave riantly riposted, “In your bed!”

Ouch! Not necessarily the most a propos thing to say on air to your friend and colleague with a missing wedding ring. Clayton may have left himself wide open, but still!

Clayton Missing Sara?

Fox & Friends Weekend co-anchor Clayton Morris has his viewers and fans wondering exactly what his marital status is. For, at least, the last three weekends he has “ditched” his wedding band. Why? Perhaps, he and colleague Dave Briggs have simply switched inclinations: Formerly, Dave rarely had his on and now he seems to never leave home without it whereas Clayton used to always wear his and now cannot seem to find it.

On the other hand, there may be a less hopeful reason. Of late, he has tended to not publicly discuss his marriage to Sarah Morris. In August of ’08,  Clayton proudly introduced Sara to the F&FW audience in a U-Report photo of his beautiful bikini-clad wife displaying a shark she had landed in New Smyrna, Florida. Almost exactly a year later (August ’09), he conspicuously avoided mentioning her during a “Love & Marriage” segment when co-hosts Dave and Alisyn Camerota readily discussed their respective spouses. The last three weekends have done nothing to dispel the suspicions of his viewers.

Clayton, of course, has a right to his privacy. As such, he is more than free to ignore any questions that people may have. But, he should consider that many of these come from his real fans who care about him and hope for the best for him and Sara.

Fox & “Fiends” Halloween

What was in Fox & Fiends Weekend witches’ brew this morning? According to the author’s recollections still clouded by this intriguing intoxicant, the odd ingredients were co-anchor Clayton Morris’ missing wedding ring, Rick Reichmuth’s piece of chocolate corset, and Dave Briggs’s drink of Cosmo with a dance by Alisyn Camerota to conjure up the potion’s magic. Eerily, this strange and powerful potation seemed to have worked its evil, making a “show about nothing” eminently watchable.

Seemingly, the first element placed into the blackened kettle was Clayton’s wedding band to add a golden glow. (If so, his wife Sara may not be overly pleased.) Apparently, the second was Rick’s strip of chocolate cloth torn from a maiden’s bodice. (Viewers, whether F&F’s meteorologist did indeed lick the young New York Chocolate Show model’s corset as proffered has yet to be determined.) Then Dave seemed to have added a glass of his Sex and the City fave Cosmo. (During the show, he seemed to have enjoyed its effects as he transmogrified from a mild-mannered family guy to a zany Kramer nailing the Seinfeld character’s speech, mannerisms, and dance.)* For the diabolic denouement, the bewitching damsel Aly did her Elaine dance before the final curtain call.

An unforgettable show? Perhaps, so. Dear reader, when the evil elixir wears off, hopefully, the author can remember these things if they were so.

*[For a snippet of Dave doing Kramer, cf. the A.S.S.]

Three “Single” Days

What Fox & Friends Weekend co-anchor has been missing his/her wedding ring for the last three days in a row? Yes, co-host Alisyn Camerota has hers on as usual, keeping her male admirers at an appropriate distance. Uncharacteristically, colleague Dave Briggs has worn his all three days: His wife Brandi must be handing it to him as he’s headed out the door. Strangely, it is Clayton Morris who has been conspicuously missing his wedding band Friday, Saturday, and today. Does Sarah need to start minding her boy, too?

Clayton Sports Ring

Happily, Fox & Friends Weekend co-anchor Clayton Morris’ wedding ring reappeared this morning. After Carpe Diem‘s “Trouble in Paradise?” article yesterday which mentioned Clayton’s missing marital band, Clayton made sure to wear it today.* Even though he seemed to ape yesterday’s cloaking of his left hand in his pocket, behind his knee, etc., perhaps, intentionally for more copy (as C.D. reader Kep posited),  he made sure that it appeared on occasion for the observant orb. In fact, he twitched his ring finger singularly anew, this time as if to say, “Here it is! All is well with the wife Sarah and me.”

Good to hear, Clayton. Good to hear!

Trouble in Paradise?

Fox & Friends Weekend co-host Clayton Morris conspicuously kept his ring finger out of sight for most of the program today. Apparently, in order for the viewer not to notice that he is not wearing his wedding ring today, he placed his left hand in his pocket, extended it on top of the curvy couch, or otherwise hid it for most of the program. Nevertheless, in an unguarded moment in the camera’s range, he singularly twitched his ring finger as if feeling the absence of his connubial band.

A mere four weeks ago (August 8, 2009), the author observed that Clayton avoided talking about his spouse Sarah when his co-host Dave Briggs asked about her. The author assumed that Sarah had insisted that he keep mum about her on the air after he had aired a pic of her in a bikini a year earlier without her apparent permission: He may have been quite wrong.

Unlike Dave Briggs, Clayton wears his wedding ring religiously. Ergo, there may be some cause for concern. However, hopefully, Clayton just forgot this time and all is well with Clayton and his “hot wife” Sarah.

Clayton’s “Hot Wife” Disappears

Where was Sara Morris today? Has Clayton’s “hot wife” ensconced herself in Dick Cheney’s bunker? When Clayton’s co-hosts Dave Briggs and Alisyn Camerota discussed their spouses* during a Fox & Friends Weekend “Love & Marriage” story, Clayton stayed strangely silent about his sweetie.

As Dave, Aly, and Clayton conversed about the trend of men taking their wives’ surnames, they began to share their own accounts. Dave revealed that his wife Brandi Moreland took his last name but kept her surname legally. When Dave queried, “You, Clayton?”, Clayton, deftly deflected his question by asking of Aly, “What about Tim?”

Aly explained, “Well, Camerota is my maiden name, and I have kept it but not for any sort of feminist thing. It’s because it’s my last grasp at my Italian ethnicity….Tim is not Italian. Had I married an Italian guy I would have taken his name but I cling to Camerota because it’s so diluted, the bloodlines.”

Then when Clayton’s turn arrived again, he jested, “No, I was going to take the last name of Paris Hilton–is my wife…So my name would have been Clayton Hilton but, you know, it didn’t happen.”

Almost a year to the day when Clayton proudly displayed his shark-snagging, bikini-clad beloved on F&FW without her permission, Clayton hid her away today. Seemingly, Sara has had a word with him.

*Dave’s wife: Brandi Moreland – F&FW (08/08/09) – 8:41 a.m. ET

*Alisyn’s hubby: Tim Lewis – http://celebrity-babies.com/2008/08/04/motherood-leave/

Dancing Dude: Dave or Clayton?

Fox & Friends co-hosts Dave Briggs and Clayton Morris dueled in an abecedarian dance-off today.* After being tutored by Cheryl Burke of Dancing with the Stars and then teaming with her, the Doublemen individually vied for dancing dude honors. According to this untrained eye, the contest was a virtual tie. However, early viewer returns and co-anchor Alisyn Camerota’s comments seemed to indicate a victory for Dave.

Did Dave defeat Clayton? Or do the viewers need a do-over with David* and his beauty Brandi taking on Clayton and his sweetie Sarah? Rematch, boys, with your real dance partners?

*9:46 a.m. ET

** Briggs: “David” to his wife and mother-in-law but “Dave” to everyone else.

Links:

https://jakeho.wordpress.com/2008/12/27/briggs-responds-my-wife-can-do-whatever-she-wants/

https://jakeho.wordpress.com/2008/08/10/my-hot-wife/

My Hot Wife

Bikini-clad Sara Morris was featured in the Fox & Friends Weekend U Report photo. The luscious brunette proudly displayed a shark she had snared off of New Smyrna Beach, FL. Dave Briggs read the segment and ad libbed, “I gotta admit the first time I saw this pic I didn’t even notice the shark: I just noticed Sara Morris. Sorry, Clayton.” Alisyn Camerota chimed in, “She is hot, Clayton.” Clayton replied that his wife had sent him the photo and implied that he had not got her permission to show it.

If Clayton can snag a delectable dame like Sara, maybe, he’s not all that bad.