JD: I Wasn’t Going to Go There!

But, fiancee Kyra Phillips certainly did. As American Morning ended today, co-anchor John Roberts reported Minnesota Viking quarterback Bret Favre’s record 500th career touchdown pass (to recently acquired receiver Randy Moss). Ad libbing, John remarked, “Perfect. [He] laid it right up. So, it’s going to be a good pairing [Favre and Moss] for the rest of the season I think.” When John stopped and Kiran waited for him to elaborate, John added, “Looking forward to seeing more of that.”

Grinning, Kiran answered, “I thought you were going to say something else.” With a slight smile, John succintly said, “No.” Feigning belief, Kiran nodded and quickly echoed, “It’ll be a good pairing for the season.” Continuing the staccato colloquy, John replied, “Yeah. Tersely, Kiran countered, “Okay, good.” “Definitely,” retorted John. “Alright,” answered Kiran.” Beaming at the viewer, John responded, “Looking forward to more.”

Subsequently, when John segued to his “sweetie” and CNN Newsroom host, Kyra Phillips, she was not about to let that sleeping dog lie. Alluding to Favre’s current NFL troubles (pertaining to alleged graphic sexts sent to Jennifer Sterger, a NY Jets reporter and Playboy/Maxim model), Kyra brassily boasted, “I know what Kiran was thinking: Brett Favre, all those text messages must be inspiring him to do well on the field. Right, Kiran? Just saying!”

As Kyra’s affianced nodded his head in agreement and looked on with a sheepish grin, Kiran demurely replied, “Well, I was thinking that there is possible talk that he might, you know, get in trouble, perhaps, suspended. So, we’ll see how the rest of the season goes.” Cackling wickedly, Kyra replied, “Yes, we shall. As we know, those boys get by with a lot of trouble.”

Raising his eyebrows, John remarked, “I wasn’t going to go there!” Seeming to know him all too well, Kyra simply smiled and said, “Mm, hmm.” In response, John wisely chuckled to himself and remained silent.

A still too rare moment of AM levity. Perhaps, CNN’s new Executive VP Ken Jautz’s sage advice on improving ratings during CNN primetime is beginning to be applied in the morning. In an interview with the Hollywood Reporter, he said, “We need to make our primetime more compelling and engaging, sometimes more fun, you could even say.” Hopefully, AM executive producer Jamie Kraft was listening.

“Cougar” Carlson: Saved by the Bell?

Rowrrr! With baby-faced beefcake “Extra” weekday host Mario Lopez on the Fox & Friends curvy couch, co-anchor Gretchen Carlson appeared ready to pounce. Thoughts of her very own “Saved by the Bell” boy toy seemed to permeate the atmosphere as she and her co-host, Brian Kilmeade and Steve Doocy, interviewed Lopez and even into the show’s subsequent block.

Before the segment, Brian gave his sportscast and named Minnesota Viking quarterback “forty-year old Brett Favre” as his choice as his weekly “Brian’s Best Player.” In an aside, he joked, “Hey, forty-year olds get off the couch, put on a uniform and the eye black. You can still play!” Before he segued to Lopez’ interview, the forty-three old Gretchen groused, “You make Favre and forties sound like it’s ancient.” Brian deadpanned, “it’s very old.”

During Lopez’ interview, Brian asked, “Am I right [that] you were never a dancer until you gave it a shot on Dancing with the Stars [2006].” After Lopez said that he had not danced since he was a child of five or six, Gretchen racily remarked, “Well, let me just tell you, you still have the moves!”

Later, when the F&F producers put up a pic of Lopez donning ladies’ lingerie, a Merry Widow variant, for FOX’s Nip/Tuck series, Gretchen oohed, “Aww, man! She suggestively added, “I understand the inside story on this was that you didn’t like the way your feet looked in the shoes but that some people liked your butt.” Reddening, Lopez asked, “Wait, what inside story is that?” Before she could answer, Brian interjected, “Yeah, what is going on, Gretchen? What are your sources?” Undeterred, Gretchen continued, “That’s what I read. I read the chicks are envious of your butt.” Apparently, rather ready to move on, Lopez deflectively declared, “I did not know that but…I was surprised they found heels…for a size eleven shoe.”

However, in the very next block, Gretchen was still purring. As she and Steve discussed mammogram and self-exams in a health care segment with Dr. Mehmet Oz (the host of the Dr. Oz Show” jested, “By the way, Mario Lopez is back in the green room trying to learn from me how to examine breasts.” Randily, Gretchen exclaimed, “I think he knows!” Finally, as the segment concluded, Gretchen lustily eyed the camera and cooed, “I’m not kidding, ladies.”

“Soft Ball” Wallace vs. “Wager Weasel” Kilmeade

Who is all wet, or, who will be all wet? In his promo to his show Fox News Sunday, Chris Wallace dared friendly antagonist Fox & Friends co-host Brian Kilmeade to a Dunking Booth duel at a country fair: He proposed that he get three balls to dunk Brian in the water and that then Brian would get his turn to do likewise. Brian accepted the challenge and upped the ante: He suggested a change in venue, i.e., the F&F veranda, where people could bet on the outcome. Chris replied, “I think that’s actually a great idea.”

Co-host Gretchen Carlson inadvertently provided Wallace his contest moniker, “Soft Ball,” when she asked about his throwing arm. Chris laughed and retold a personal “scarring experience” of when he tried out to be a pitcher in sixth grade: He said that he threw the ball so softly that the opposing batter “took four steps waiting for the ball to get there” and “then he hit it about 500 feet (nobody had ever hit a ball as far as he hit that ball).” He described it as “the beginning and end of [his] pitching career.”

As to Brian’s nom de plume, he earned that when he weaseled out of his playoff football bet with Clayton Morris earlier this year.* After rescuing Gretchen from her lost wager to Clayton** (when his Eagles beat her Vikings) by doubling down (both Brian and Gretchen would sing the Eagle war anthem while Eagle jerseys if the Eagles felled the Giants), Brian squirreled out of his obligations. He had Pennsylvania Governor Ed Rendell sign a memo purporting to absolve Brian and Gretch of their debts.

Chris, wise move to add the “me first” caveat!

*https://jakeho.wordpress.com/2009/02/01/briggs-brian-welcher/

**https://jakeho.wordpress.com/2009/01/06/clayton-loses-tutu-gretchen-gains-jersey/

F&F: Home of the Birds & Weas(el)*

Fox & Friends co-anchor Brian Kilmeade inadvertently provided a new slogan for the show today: F&F: Home of the Birds and Weas(el). In an interview with Governor Ed Rendell, the Massapequa native continued to try to weasel out of his and fellow co-host Gretchen Carlson’s lost Giants/ Eagles wager with F&F Weekend co-anchor Clayton Morris. (Brian and Gretchen agreed to wear Eagle jerseys and sing the Eagle war anthem if the Eagles won). Brian shamelessly stated, “Governor Rendell gave me a special governor’s exemption: we no longer have to fulfill out bet with the Philadelphia Eagles fight song.”

Gretchen chimed, “I wanted to do that.” That was news to F&F fans since Gretch “double downed” with Brian to get out of her lost Vikings/Eagles bet. Nevertheless, at the end of the segment, Gretch said, “Governor Ed Rendell, thanks for taking Brian out of the Eagles thing: I still might have to do the fight song.”

Perhaps, Gretch would prefer to be a red fox rather than a red squirrel.

*Steve Doocy went to the University of Kansas (Jayhawks); Gretchen Carlson went to Stanford University (Cardinal); and Brian Kilmeade went “Welch.”

https://jakeho.wordpress.com/2009/02/01/briggs-brian-welcher/

Gretch, Brian: Bet Weasels?

When are Fox & Friends co-anchor Gretchen Carlson and Brian Kilmeade going to finally pay up on their lost football playoff bet with Clayton? Has Gretchen joined Brian in the vice of which she regularly indicts Brian, i.e., weaseling out of wagers?

Gretchen bet F&F Weekend co-host Clayton Morris that her beloved Minnesota Vikings would slay his hometown Philadelphia Eagles: If she lost, she promised to don an Eagle jersey and sing the Eagle war anthem. When they did, Brian Kilmeade bailed her out with an Eagles/Giants double-down bet in which he would join Gretch in doing the same. The Eagles beat the Giants over two weeks ago, and Gretchen and Brian still haven’t paid the proverbial piper.

The Super Bowl is this Sunday. So, to quote Laura Ingraham, Gretch, Brian, shut up and sing!

Gretch: Wager Weasel?

Fox & Friends co-host Gretchen Carlson seems to weasling out of her bet with F&F Weekend co-anchor Clayton Morris.* After a Consumer Electronics Show segment with Clayton showcasing the latest gadgets this morning, Gretch asked, “Hey, Clayton: ‘member that bet that we had?” Clayton replied, “Yeah, I remember.”

Gretchen continued, “Well, Brian may be willing to take a mulligan for me so we’re going to reveal that when you join us later on in the show.” Clayton cagily cracked, “Wait a second: that sounds like a scam to me.” Then F&F co-host Brian Kilmeade intoned, “Maybe, the Giants can do what the Vikings couldn’t and that’s beat your Eagles: Maybe, it’s time to factor me into this.”

When Clayton returned, nothing more was said about the wager between Gretchen and Clayton. More than likely, Gretch will not be wearing the Eagles’ jersey tomorrow nor singing their war anthem. As Elvis, today’s birthday boy, might say, “A little less conversation, a little more action, please.”**

*https://jakeho.wordpress.com/2009/01/06/clayton-loses-tutu-gretchen-gains-jersey/

**http://crocmusic.com/track/197443/elvis_presley/little_less_conversation/

Clayton Loses Tutu: Gretchen Gains Jersey

Unfortunately, for Fox & Friends viewers’ sheer entertainment value, F&F Weekend co-host Clayton Morris won his football bet with F&F co-anchor Gretchen Carlson. Since the Philadelphia Eagles, Clayton’s hometown pick, beat the Minnesota Vikings, Gretch’s home state team, Clayton will be spared having to wear a tutu while reenacting his F&F Christmas charades version of “The Dance of the Sugar Plum Fair.” However, Gretch will have to don an Eagle jersey and sing the Eagle war song.

According to Clayton, this Friday is the day of reckoning for Gretch.