Dave: “We Love Molly” But Ainz “Hot Mama”

Briggs/Earhardt’s “Heat and Meat” II: a Fox & Friends [Memorial] Weekend sequel. In 2009, a frisky, ringless Ainsley Earhardt co-hosted Memorial Day with co-anchors Dave Briggs and Clayton Morris: Yes, she racily commented on Dave’s “meat” but, more infamously, she–or, more specifically, her rump (and Janice Dean’s arse) was ogled by the appreciative eye of Dave. While Carpe Diem reported the bawdy humor, Jay Leno lampooned Dave’s eyeing of the delightful derrieres of Ainsley (and Janice). Not too surprisingly, in 2010, FNC Executive VP of Programming Bill Shine put in a somewhat more boring beauty, Courtney Friel, to co-host the F&F Memorial Day edition.

However, this year, Shine gave the buxom blonde another chance as he let Ainsley once again co-host the F&F Memorial Day special (and the prior Sunday for good measure). Even though she did have to share her holiday-weekend-center-seat-curvy-couch duties with the “new girl” Molly Line (who subbed for regular co-anchor Alisyn Camerota on F&F Friday and Saturday), she did get more air time as she saucily celebrated the early beginning of the holiday weekend as F&F’s Fleet Week NYC 2011 troop correspondent aboard the U.S.S. Iwo-Jima Friday.

Before her first segment Friday, Ainsley appeared live in a preview excitedly waving to the F&F audience as she happily posed with the sailors on deck the U.S.S. Iwo-Jima.* As she did, Ainsley’s belly button was bared and producers simultaneously aired Trace Adkin’s “Hot Mama” paean. When F&F returned from break, Dave introduced Ainsley, saying, “It is Fleet Week in New York City, and our own Ainsley Earhardt on a very tough assignment today aboard the U.S.S. Iwo-Jima.”**

Flirtatiously, Dave continued, “Ainsley, I don’t know if you heard but the song introing [sic] you was “Hot Mama,” we played earlier: I’m guess the troops there share the sentiment.” As Clayton gave a thumbs up in ardent agreement and Molly chuckled, Ainsley cooed, “Awww….You are so sweet!” In response, Dave boyishly ducked his head and grinned.

A few days later, on Memorial Day, Dave, Clayton, and Ainsley reprised their ribald “meat” revelry in spite of the fact that the only cooking segment included only Dave and three other males. When the Monday program commenced, Clayton jested, “Can  you handle more meat this morning, Dave?” In answer, Dave retorted, “Clayton, no, I cannot. I am maxed out, man!”

Unfortunately or not, Dave was assuredly not completely”maxed out”: perhaps, it was the “hand holding” less than ten minutes later by Ainsley.*** After Ainsley had read the headline news stories, Dave placed his left hand on the curvy couch. Shortly, thereafter, Ainsley put hers down next to Dave’s and touched it briefly and then moved her hand forward. When she did, Dave tapped her hand thrice and she began to respond in kind. As she did, Clayton joked, “You guys holding hands over here?” Smiling sheepishly, Dave retorted, “We are holding hands.” Laughing, Ainsley, added, “Kumbayah!”

Approximately, twenty minutes later, when F&F returned after the first half hour break, Clayton comically commented, “[T]his morning, we asked you earlier in the show–Dave put out the call: Please send us photos of your meat.”**** Dave interjected, “And, no, that does not include you, New York Congressman [Anthony Weiner]. We don’t want your photos!” Shaking her head with a naughty smile, Ainsley guffawed, “You did not just say that!”

Yes, he did, Ainsley. Even if Molly turns out to be the new F&FW siren that Dave loves, he does not seem to be able to shake you, his first F&FW wife. But, who knows? Maybe, he won’t have to after all.

* Fox & Friends – 05/27/11 (@ 6:38 a.m. ET).

** Ibid at @ 6:43 a.m. ET.

*** Fox & Friends – 05/30/11 (@ 6:09 a.m. ET).

**** Ibid. at @ 6:32 a.m. ET.

Clayton: A Ham with Broken Eggs?

Clayton Morris: “I’m Steve Doocy.” For media news junkies who may have missed it over an extended Memorial Day weekend, Fox & Friends guest co-host Clayton Morris called himself “Steve Doocy” [for whom he was subbing] twice during a “Fox Flash” segment. [Vid via HuffPo.] His “faux pas” was seen in different lights by the various cable news coverers: The Huffington Post reported the story straight; Breitbart.tv asked, “Was he joking?”; Mediaite wondered whether it was a “teleprompter mistake” or a “weird inside joke”; and TVNewser concluded sarcastically in an update that it was a “‘hilarious’ joke.”

In the author’s opinion, Clayton seemed to be simply clowning as he has been wont since he was first introduced to Fox & Friends fans over two years ago. In the past, when one of Clayton’s attempts at humor fell painfully flat, he quoted funnyman Conan O’Brien who had purportedly said, “To make an omelet, you have to break a few eggs.”* I.e., if one is to be successful, one should not fear to fail.

With all of the flak that Clayton has received since his “joke” last Friday, it appears that he must have broken, at least, a “baker’s dozen” or two. Clayton, time to go back to the farmer’s market?

*[Aside: Apparently, a variant of Lenin’s quote, “If you want to make an omelet, you have to be willing to break a few eggs.”]

Dave: “Pardon Me, Courtney”

“I wasn’t paying attention.” Fox & Friends Weekend co-anchor Dave Briggs appeared to channel the author this morning as he shared headline news reading duties with Courtney Friel. After over 2 1/2 hours of a forgettable “special edition” Memorial Day edition, Dave seemed to succumb to the tedium. After Courtney read the first story and a concomitant vid ran, the camera focused upon Dave who was peering downward: looking up suddenly, he turned to Courtney and apologized, “Pardon me, Courtney: I wasn’t paying attention.”

You were not alone, Dave. Of course, F&F viewers who were celebrating the start of their Memorial Day by firing up the grill, grabbing a few bloody Mary’s, and preparing the food may have also had less than an eagle eye on their TV. However, some of those who were actually gathered around the set could be forgiven for suffering from a similar malady.

Readers of this blog had ample warning that FNC SVP of Programming Bill Shine seemed to have plans for a Memorial Day much less memorable than the one last year. (Of course, the 2009 was notable primarily for Dave’s apparent appreciation of the rumps of his female colleagues, Ainsley Earhardt and Janice Dean, as captured and lampooned by Jay Leno.) Notably, Shine did not bring Ainsley back for the celebrations this year and both Dave and Janice were conspicuously absent from the obligatory meat segments. Interestingly, both of them were needled by Clayton: Before his Johnsonville sausage segment with Courtney, Clayton teased a “hungry” Janice that they were “gonna have to keep [her] off the platform” of the weiner mobile and, afterwards, kidded an in-studio Dave about being stuck without eating the brats.*

F&F Memorial Day 2009: a day to remember. F&F Memorial Day 2010: a day to forget.

Fox & Friends – 05/31/10 (@8:39 a.m. ET)

F&F Forgets Ainsley? UPDATE: Recalls Janice

F&FW‘s Memorial Day 2009 (with Ainsley Earhardt), a day to remember. Apparently, FNC SVP of Programming Bill Shine still recalls Fox & Friends Memorial Day last year when guest co-host Ainsley Earhardt heated up the show. Perhaps, he read and recollects Carpe Diem‘s account of Ainsley’s titillating of Dave Briggs with her bawdy banter about “huge meat.” Assuredly, he remembers his star co-host Dave Briggs getting grief from Jay Leno for allegedly eyeing Ainsley’s derriere that day–not to mention the acute embarrassment that Dave felt. Apparently, Shine is making certain that F&F’s Memorial Day 2010 is not quite as memorable: I.e., he has Courtney Friel, not Ainsley Earnhardt, filling in for co-anchor Alisyn Camerota.

But, Bill, will F&F’s Memorial Day be as much fun as last year?

[Author’s aside: As to Aly’s absence, at the conclusion of F&FWSa, Dave stated, “Clayton and I will see you here in, no, this, this is only Saturday [so] all three of us are back tomorrow, and Aly added, “Yeah. I’ll be here tomorrow.” With regard to Courtney’s filling in for Aly, during Red Eye’s “Post-Game Wrap-Up” with Andy Levy Thursday (May 27), Courtney revealed, “I’m going to be hosting Fox & Friends on Monday morning.”]

Update1: On F&FSu (@7:27 a.m. ET),  Aly iterated, “I won’t go to work…tomorrow.”

Update2: According to her blog, Janice Dean will be in tomorrow. Ironically, like last year, while Dave and Clayton will be in tomorrow for Memorial Day, both Aly and Rick are off. Furthermore, like last year Janice is subbing for Rick: However, Courtney, not Ainsley, will be temping for Aly. Apparently, Shine did not want to put the full cast of that ribald episode together again. N.B. Janice was another alleged object of Dave’s roving eye and also engaged in some of the aforementioned “bawdy banter” (ironically, during A.S.S. or the After the Show Show).

Ainsley Labors Today

Guest host Ainsley Earhardt did not appear to be in a celebratory spirit on today’s Fox & Friends Labor Day edition. Surprisingly, she seemed listless as she played third-string backup in the center of the curvy couch.* Attractively attired in her proper red dress (modestly v-necked, almost sleeveless, and above-the-knee) and her tan high heels (closed-toed), she appeared hesitant, chastened and cloistered. Where was her assertive, edgy, and sexy side that had evidenced with such elan in her Memorial Day appearance?

Perhaps, Jay Leno had a bit too much fun with that episode. Certainly, for co-host Dave Briggs’ comfort. And, apparently, perhaps, for that of Bill Shine (FNC Senior Veep of Programming).

*Ainsley substituted for F&F Weekend co-anchor Alisyn Camerota, who would have normally filled in for F&F co-host Gretchen Carlson today.

Ainsley Unleashed: “Not that Innocent”

Ringless Ainsley robustly and randily returned to Fox & Friends today. The erstwhile sweet, innocent Southern belle once again readily embraced her seemingly solo status (from hubby Kevin McKinney)* after her “His Huge Meat” Memorial Day on F&F.** Today it ran the gamut from the reasonably adiaphorous to a somewhat Madonna-like utterance.

Innocuously, Ainsley reminded co-anchors Clayton Morris and Dave Briggs and her audience that she is no longer home-bound when she apprised them that she had been out late with the girls last night (when F&F brass asked her to host F&F today). Then she read the Nearly Naked Fireworks report for Clayton so that he “could look at the [‘degrading and immoral’] video” of the bikini-clad beauties. Penultimately, she risquely bemoaned not being able to get a better look at two cops making out on a dash cam “in the heat of the moment.”

Ultimately, however, Ainsley pushed the envelope over the line even for her F&F crew. In a Petgadgets.com segment including dog cams, Ainsley asked, “What’s the most interesting thing that you’ve caught on camera?” The spokeswoman replied, “I don’t even want to imagine if the pets are in the bedroom. Hello!” Ainsley laughed, “What they’re doing: Licking, right?” The guest’s eyes abruptly widened and she guffawed, “Oh, my gosh!” In the background, someone [sounding like Clayton, if not he] interjected, “Oh, please!”

As Britney Spears might opine, “Oops! Ainsley did it again. She’s not that innocent!”***

*http://www.thecolumbiastar.net/news/2005/0415/Society/203.html

**https://jakeho.wordpress.com/2009/05/26/ringless-ainsley-his-huge-meat/

***http://www.mtv.com/lyrics/spears_britney/oops_i_did_it_again/1943318/lyrics.jhtml

Ringless Ainsley: “His Huge Meat”

Ainsley Earhardt returned to Fox & Friends yesterday without a wedding ring but with a wicked sense of humor. And the, apparently, unattached Southern belle directed it at her handsome married co-anchor Dave Briggs. With the aid of weatherwoman Janice Dean and Famous Dave, she toyed with the boy to his discomfit during the barbecue segments.

In a tease to the upcoming barbecue piece, Janice introduced Famous Dave, saying, “[He] came…to mid-town Manhattan to show me some meat, some huge meat.” In her segue to Dave, Ainsley, and Clayton Morris, she remarked, “For the best barbecue Memorial Day that has ever been seen with Famous Dave, we’re coming back in a moment.” Looking at Dave, Ainsley saucily added, “And his huge meat.” In response, Dave merely raised his eyebrows, shook his head, and held his tongue.

Later, in the After the Show Show barbecue segment, Ainsley continued her coquetting. As Famous Dave was displaying the various seasonings, Janice asked, “Is it all about what you rub in the meat?” Both Dave and Ainsley laughed knowingly. When Janice facetiously asked why they did, Dave explained, “Well, you introduced him and said that he brought some huge meat for you.” Janice commented, “This is the After the Show Show where we can have a few little double entendres.” Joining the fun, Famous Dave interjected, “Well, you know, they say Dave packs big meat.” Janice joyfully exclaimed, “Alright, Dave!” Ainsley naughtily queried, “Which Dave?” Smiling, Dave looked down, pursed his lips, pointed to Famous Dave, and tried visibly to maintain his composure.

For Fox & Friends fans, a ringless Ainsley was a rather spicy dish. A memorable Memorial Day!

F&F (05/25/09) – @6:41 p.m.
After the Show Show (05/25/09)

My Name’s Ainsley, Dave!

Ironically, on Memorial Day, Fox & Friends co-host Dave Briggs did not remember his “fallen” colleague this morning. As he segued from the Pundit Pit to his F&F co-anchors, he said, “Let’s get out to Clayton [Morris] and Alisyn [Camerota] with a look at what’s coming up on the show. Guys!” Feigning offense, former F&FW co-anchor and today’s F&F guest host Ainsley Earhardt declared, “My name’s Ainsley, Dave!”

Chagrined, Dave replied, “Did I say Alisyn? I apologize.” Ainsley smiled, “That’s alright: that’s okay.” Standing safely behind Ainsley, Clayton sub rosa aptly asked, “How could you forget?” Turning to the camera, a grinning Dave explained, “Old habits.”

Don’t bring those up, Dave! As many F&FW fans remember, those did not fare well for the then callow line-up of Ainsley, Dave, and Clayton. However, together again, the three seemed to have embraced more welcome wonts: They were smarter, sharper, and edgier.

Happy Memorial Day!

Ainsley Mocks “Real Man”

Fox & Friends Weekend co-host Ainsley Earhardt mocked Obama National Delegate candidate Mario Champion as a “real man” on this Memorial Day edition of F&F. In a segment entitled “Citizens’ Campaign: Average Joes Run For Delegate” while discussing Champion, Dave Briggs said, “Now I love this guy: [Champion] plans a ‘poetry slam’…to raise his delegate profile and money for his candidate who is Barack Obama.” Ainsley, laughing derisively, interrupted, “That’s a real man.” Dave declared, “You gotta go to the poetry slam: I, mean, how can you miss that?” Ainsley repeated, “That is a real man.” No bards for Ainsley: only “real men” need apply to win the heart of that South Carolina Southern belle.