Hottie Heather Returns to F&F

Former Fox & Friends newsreader Heather Nauert returns as the new State Department spokesperson. The blonde beauty had the same sexy mien with a short dress and plunging neckline this early morn on the curvy couch as usual: And, she also brought the brains and strength re North Korea, Russia, and Syria with full control of POTUS’ perspective. She was a true Trump representative: Sexy, smart, and strong a la FLOTUS!

Congratulations, Heather, on your job! And, welcome back to F&F!

*Fox & Friends – 09/04/17 (@ 8:03 a.m. ET).

 

Clayton’s Back! Why?

Heather Childress: “Something a little bit different this morning.”* Fox & Friends First, generally, has been–and should be–a boy-free anchor zone. Unfortunately, the FNC brass seems to be inanely tinkering with the concept of feminine pulchritude arousing F&FF fans aptly in the morn. To wit, true to his word, Fox & Friends Weekend co-host Clayton Morris was back again as an F&FF co-host this early morn: He looked like the sad sack who wanted to be a Hooter’s waiter: It just does not work.

Clayton, you are fine on the curvy couch as a bookend to the “fox” du jour on Fox & Friends Weekend: But, sorry, you are an amusing annoyance as a F&FF co-host trying to supplant such beauties as Abby Huntsman or Heather Nauert.

F&FF co-hosts: Only lovelies need apply!

*F&FF – 09/19/16 (@ 5:30 a.m. ET).

[Author’s aside: As a kind, savvy source apprised me, Clayton’s FNC bio now includes him as an F&FF co-host: Hopefully, it was in error.]

 

F&FF: Fox & Friends First First?

Ladies? Fox & Friends First viewers were given a jarring jolt this morning–and it was not the coffee. Rather, it was F&F Weekend co-anchor Clayton Morris seizing the seat that Abby Huntsman or Heather Nauert normally possess next to Heather Childers. Needless to say, it was not a pretty sight.

But, brace yourselves, F&FF fans, Clayton said that he will be back tomorrow. Where is Roger Ailes when FNC needs him? And, Clayton go back to the weekend–and, give the ladies back their seat!

[Author’s aside: Re Carpe Diem article title, supra, this is the first time in the author’s recollection that a male has co-hosted F&FF.]

Correction (re author’s aside): Apparently, I expunged the F&FF male invasion from my memory. :-) Fox & Friends First throwback: debut announcement elucidation (Ainsley Earhardt & Anna Kooiman). Link: http://video.foxnews.com/v/1488443413001/co-hosts-ainsley-earhardt-and-anna-kooiman-preview-fox-and-friends-first/?#sp=show-clips

Post Anna: Heather Nauert?

On the Fox & Friends Weekend curvy couch. As the lovely Anna Kooiman gambols about on her cross-country trek showing hubby Tim Stuckey the sights (before going Down Under to live with him), frequent fill-in F&F First co-host Heather Nauert auditions for Anna’s erstwhile job. And, Heather is not too bad: She is smart, sexy, and no nonsense–after all, she is from the Chicago area.

The delightful thing about Heather is that she is sexy fun and unashamed while she is not afraid to take her male co-hosts to task. Captivatingly, she is happy to disclose her first kiss and with whom; to reveal skipping school to get a fake I.D.; and to confess her nude frolic in a VW bug. In fact, she reminds the author of a certain gal who helped set the precedent for what it means to be queen of the F&F weekday curvy couch, E. D. Hill–the gal who could be more than a match for her bookend guys and who put the “Fox” in “Fox & Friends.”

Good job, Heather!

 

Nauert’s Naked Frolic

Naughty Heather confesses. Fox & Friends news reader Heather Nauert really heated things up for her viewers today on the F&F plaza: she revealed that she had once pulled a Lady Godiva in a Volkswagen bug–with the top down for all to see. And, she did not seem to mind that Peeping Tom.

During a “Top Adventure Vehicles for  the Summer” segment [vid], the F&F co-hosts (Ainsley Earhardt, Steve Doocy, Brian Kilmeade) and Heather helped showcase the vehicles with auto expert Mike Caudill on the patio. When Heather’s turn arrived, she sat at the wheel of a 2016 Volkswagen Beetle Dune, exclaiming, “Come on over! Wooh!” As he walked over to jump in, he said, “This is a throwback vehicle: This takes us back, right?” Apparently, it did indeed.

Before Caudill could even close the door, Heather saucily asked, “Ah! Can I tell you the last memory of this car?” Before he could answer, Heather racily revealed, “I lost on a dare to my best friend who had this car and I had to ride in it naked! Hiding her head in her hands in mock shame and then looking up with a sexy smile, Heather giggled, “With the top down!” Turning to an allured Caudill, Heather risquely continued, “And, we pulled up next to my Latin teacher.” Then, she laughed robustly–as if she were a ribald German barmaid serving up copious drafts with verboten views.

Trying to compose himself, Caudill did not reply instantly to Heather’s siren song: Rather, he simply continued, saying, “So, this is a Volkswagen Beetle Dune.” Chuckling, Heather replied, “You’re like ‘anyway’!” Finally, responding, Caudill exclaimed, “I know. I’m like she just said that she’d go naked in this thing!…How do I transition off that?”

Transition? Hmm. Lady Godiva rode on her steed: Likewise, Lady Heather rides in her Beetle! Look out, boys: Here she comes!

*Fox & Friends – 05/04/16 (@ 7:54 a.m. ET).

Elisabeth’s Tearful Farewell

Hasselbeck: “This hurts!” Today, Fox & Friends co-anchor Elisabeth Hasselbeck said  a painful goodbye to her co-hosts, Steve Doocy and Brian Kilmeade; the F&F crew; and her fans after a mere two plus years on the curvy couch. The three hours of F&F today were replete with homages to Elisabeth from the likes of Judge Andrew Napolitano, Governor Chris Christie, and GOP front runner Donald Trump. And, Elisabeth was effusive in her praise for, of course, the boss Roger Ailes, for her co-hosts Steve and Brian, and seemingly for every Tom, Dick, and Harry who works for F&F. It was vintage Elisabeth: sweet, cloying so, and seemingly sincere.

The author wishes her well in her position as CBO, i.e., Chief Breakfast Officer, of the Hasselbeck household. Speaking of which, it seems odd, in retrospect, that her own family, hubby Tim and the kids, seemed to have taken a backseat to her work family of Steve, Brian, newsreader Heather Nauert, meteorologist Maria Molina, and the F&F crew today. The faithful F&F fan might have hoped to hear not only her fond farewells to her F&F fam (and fans) today but also a dear, sweet welcome back to full-time work as Hasselbeck CBO from her eagerly awaiting hubs and kiddos–on screen or even on the phone this morn. Alas, it was not to be.

Elisabeth, even though you initially seemed to the author to be an odd choice to follow the footsteps of E.D. Hill and Gretchen Carlson, you have earned your place on the curvy couch–as a sister to Steve and Brian rather than the sexy siren to her couch mates. Much success in the future, Elisabeth!

[Author’s aside: The subtitle, infra, is a quote from Elisabeth re her departure in the final moments of the first F&F segment this morning. F&F – 12/22/15 (@ 6:10 a.m. ET).]

Naughty Nauert’s First Kiss

Heather and Jamie sitting in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G. Thursday, Fox & Friends newsreader Heather Nauert revealed her first kisser and where they did it. After a “Shot of the Morning” viral video of a little boy describing his “mind-blowing” first kiss, waggish F&F co-anchor Brian Kilmeade tossed to Heather, saying, “Here to describe her first kiss, Heather Nauert!”*

Gamely, Heather grinned and pointed upward, responding, “In a tree house!”

Not expecting her eager revelation, Brian exclaimed, “Oh! In a tree house? Fantastic!”

Elaborating unabashedly, Heather replied, “Yeah! The guy contacted me on Facebook a few years ago!”

Chiming in mischievously, co-host Steve Doocy, queried, “With?”

Unashamedly, Heather answered, “Jamie Evans.” Waving through the camera to her first beau, Heather exclaimed, “Hi, there, Jamie!”

F&F: Fox & Friends. F&F Thursday (with Heather): fox & fun!

*Fox & Friends – 01/22/15 (@ 6:34 ET).

 

Heather: Happening Now Happily

Tony Snow: “God made you beautiful: Now you’ve got to make yourself smart.” Quirky Fox & Friends newsreader Heather Nauert seems to have found a more fitting slot of late on FNC as guest co-host of Happening Now.  Paired with HN regular co-anchor Jon Scott oft now that Jenna Lee is on maternity leave, the “Chicago” chirper excels in her new chair as a sharp counterpart to FNC’s whilom Shakespearean actor/go-to aviation “expert” Jon: Consequently, fans of F&F are treated to a more mellifluous Carolinian cadence in the early morn as F&F First co-hosts Heather Childers and Ainsley Earhardt often fill in for Heather N. as headline news anchor.

F&F fans can now enjoy their show more as the Southern belle beauties ameliorate their Yankee (Rhode Island) colleague Elisabeth Hasselbeck‘s too oft nasal sounds with their delightful drawl. To boot, the viewers are not subjected to a pedantic Ms. Romper Room Nauert who too oft wants to “tell you about this” before she actually does.

Yes, the “younger sister of another Heather (Locklear)” is beautiful, and she is smart. But, she can be pedantic and irritating a la erstwhile F&F anchor Gretchen Carlson when she talks down to her audience who generally know as much or more than she does. Like the former Miss America [vid] with her new show (The Real Story with Gretchen Carlson), Heather now seems to be more relaxed and at ease on HN–not feeling as if she has to prove her smarts to her audience vis-a-vis the boys, F&F co-anchors Brian Kilmeade and Steve Doocy.

Heather Happening Now: beautiful, smart–and, finally, starting to chill.

[Author’s aside: The subtitle, supra, is based on a Tony Snow quote cited in a Paul Farhi article in the Washington Post.]

Heather Nauert’s Fake I.D.

“And my parents never knew!” Last Thursday, seemingly straight-laced Fox & Friends news reader Heather Nauert let viewers in on a little secret–she has not always been such a good girl. During an F&F Throwback Thursday segment, Heather showed a facsimile of her first car, a white station wagon with faux wooden side panels.* Elaborating, she said, “This is the mighty wagon that was actually not my car: My friend found this mighty wagon in Illinois about a week ago [and] she took a picture and sent it to me.”

Grinning mischievously, she remarked, “The best story I have about this [is] one day we skipped school, a friend of mine and I did: We went to downtown Chicago to get fake I.D.’s.”

When F&F co-anchor Steve Doocy interjected, “How very Ferris Bueller!,” Heather replied, “Yeah, very Ferris Bueller! Coming back on the expressway, I jumped a median because I had missed my exit, got the car stuck on that median–this is during rush hour in Chicago, right–and so one of those big highway crews then comes by: It’s like this huge truck like the size of a, an ambulance or something and it pushes us off the median. We head home to Rockford, Illinois, and my parents never knew–until now!

Laughing, she exclaimed, “Sorry, Mom!”

As a epilogue, she added, “I think I was seventeen or eighteen….”

Good gal Heather Nauert: I can be bad–really!

* Fox & Friends – 07/10/14 (@ 8:41 a.m. ET).

New Day Censors Sexy SI Swimsuit Models–Butt

Fox & Friends celebrates the bevy of beauties’ derrieres. Sex: Yes, it sells. And, that may be one of the reasons that priggish CNN’s morning show New Day gets it head handed to it on a silver platter on a daily basis by its saucy FNC counterpart Fox & Friends.

Today, New Day (a la the 1956 “Ed Sullivan Show” of Elvis’ gyrating hips) bowdlerized the bottom half of the cover of the Sports Illustrated 50th Anniversary Issue cover which featured three bathing beauties flaunting their assets. In its sole coverage of the SI cover, ND entertainment correspondent Nischelle Turner stood next to a big screen (featuring the fetching faces and topless tops of Lily Aldridge, Nina Agdal, and Chrissy Teigen from the back), reporting, “Now this is the first time since 1994 that three women have been on the cover.”*

Noting the obvious omission, i.e., ND co-host Kate Bouldan complained, “I don’t see swimsuits, though….You could actually show their derrieres!” Expressing her disappointment at New Day‘s censorship, she explained, “One of my girlfriends–her swimsuit line is featured on the cover of Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue“: When Nischelle responded, “Oh, so they’ve got your friend’s bottoms on?,” Kate excitedly exclaimed, “Yes! “Basta! So proud! It’s such a big moment!”

In pellucid contradistinction from CNN, F&F prominently and proudly featured the uncensored scantily clad ladies: To wit, it proudly proclaimed “Bottoms up” of the 2014 SI Swimsuit cover girls. At the start of each hour, the cover was shown as F&F co-hosts touted SI‘s answer to the winter blues: In tandem, respectively, news reader Heather Nauert would end her top-of-the-hour headline stories with the SI Swimsuit cover displayed on F&F full screen as she invited guys to “take a long look” at “those booties” that “everybody wants to see.”**

Except for Jeff Zucker‘s censors on CNN.

*New Day – 02/14/14 (@ 7:14 a.m. ET).

**Fox & Friends -02/14/14 (@ 6:11 a.m. ET; @ 7:06 a.m. ET; and @ 8:06 a.m. ET).

F&F: Ainsley Replaces Heather?

Elisabeth Hasselbeck: “I love seeing you in the morning.” Yesterday, Fox & Friends First co-host Ainsley Earhardt filled in for F&F newsreader Heather Nauert. Regrettably, only for the day.

And, seemingly, that is the sentiment that co-anchor Elisabeth Hasselbeck expressed mid-show Monday. Segueing to Ainsley to proclaim the headline news, Elizabeth exclaimed, “You know who looks good? Ainsley!”* Turning to Elizabeth with a big smile, Ainsley cooed, “Aww, you’re so sweet!” Feeling the love, Elisabeth aptly answered,  “I love seeing you in the morning!” Perhaps, presciently, Ainsley responded, “Thanks! I love being with you guys!”

Ainsley does fit in rather well with Elizabeth and the F&F boys. Even though she may not have that “alpha bitch” prerequisite a la Lis to co-host with Steve Doocy and Brian Kilmeade, the South Carolina belle does add her delightfully genteel manner–friendly, funny, and deferential to the “stars” of the show. Instead of the awkward ad hoc observations that Heather too oft makes, Ainsley facilitates a smooth transition from and back to the co-hosts.

For fans of the Chi-town chick (like White House press secretary Tony Snow who told her “God made you beautiful”), she is not bad to look at–at all. But, sometimes, the leggy blonde beauty is just a bit too perky and chirpy for the Fox & Friends dawn. Ironically, an hour earlier, paired with the other Heather (Heather Childers), she can be a delightful wake-up call.

F&FF: Wake up to Heather–in fact, both of them! F&F: But, greet the day with Ainsley and Lis!

*Fox & Friends – 01/21/14 (@ 7:34 a.m. ET).

Huddy & PAB: “Simply the Best”?

The girls are back in town! Former Fox & Friends First co-hosts Juliet Huddy and Patti Ann Browne opened their old show to the inimitable Tina Turner’s “Simply the Best” this morning. As current F&FF co-hosts Ainsley Earhardt and Heather Childers took the holidays off, it was an amusing start to the day after Christmas for F&FF fans.

As the reader may recall, F&FF (this iteration) debuted almost two years ago (March 5, 2012) with Ainsley and Anna Kooiman at the helm (vid) as nine other rotating co-anchors (i.e., Heather C., Heather Nauert, PAB, Juliet, Arthel Neville, Jamie Colby, Julie Banderas, Dave Briggs, and Clayton Morris) stood at the ready for their shifts. However, on its one-year anniversary, Ainsley signaled that the F&FF co-hosts had been pared to four: She, the two Heathers, and PAB had survived the cut. Approximately, six months later, FNC whittled the number down to two, namely, Ainsley and Heather Childers: TV Newser rather charitably reported that FNC had chosen the two as the “permanent anchors” of F&FF.

But, today, Juliet and PAB had their revenge at Ainsley and Heather Childers’ expense as producers, wittingly or not, committed a lese-majeste, declaring the fresh Jersey girl and Red Eye‘s “notorious PAB” “simply the best [better than all the rest].” Of course, Ainz and Heather C. are scheduled to return to rule their roost soon. And, if the sages are right, she who laughs last laughs best.

F&FF: Ringing in the New Year with feline fireworks? If so, it should be fun! Rowrr!

Stormy Maria: Inked Pink!

Molina reveals her secret “tart tatt”–nine months late. For Carpe Diem fans of the Fox News weather gal Maria Molina, a/k/a “Cosmo’s caliente Latina,” the revelation was a long time coming. Over nine months ago, the author noted the barbed pink/red ringlet adorning Maria, Tweeting her, “[I]s that a red “barb” tattoo or a beauty mark on your left wrist?” Not a word from the Nicaraguan nymph: Perhaps, the demure beauty thought that FNC was a tatt-free zone and she did not want to be dispatched posthaste like her comely “spanked and spurned” predecessor Domenica Davis.

Nevertheless, Monday, F&F newsreader Heather Nauert outed the demure damsel on F&F‘s After the Show Show. During the episode entitled, “Hidden talents,” with Maria, Heather, and co-hosts, Elisabeth Hasselbeck and Steve Doocy, on the curvy couch,  Heather abruptly turned to Maria, teasing, “Give me your hand here! Give me your hand! What is that on your wrist?”*

Embarrassed, Maria initially pulled her arm away from Heather: Then, complying, she gave her hand to Heather. Subsequently, Heather (and Elisabeth) turned Maria’s arm for all of her F&F fans to see the reddish pink symbol inked on her wrist. Interjecting, Steve intoned, “Wait! Wait!…Oh, look at that: it’s a stamp!”

Chiming in, Heather added, “It looks like she was at a little club.”

Chagrined, Maria admitted, “It’s a tattoo.” Shyly, she subsequently explained, “It’s actually a tropical storm.” Then, she added, “It’s supposed to be Hurricane Andrew. And, that’s the reason I became a meteorologist.”

Sounds good–at least, to the parents. But, for ardent acolytes of the smoldering Maria Molina, her explanation seems almost too convenient. For those votaries of a tropical stormy Maria, her symbol looks almost a little like the inchoate etchings of Pamela Anderson’s racy barbed wire.

To quote Eminem, “Maybe, that’s what happens when a tornado meets a volcano.” Maria, “love the way you lie.” Or, not.

[Author’s aside: Aerosmith’s Steven Tyler weighs in? “Pink is my favorite color.”]

*A.S.S. (12/16/13) – @ 03:08/04:20

H/t: J$P. (Steve Doocy’s “shout-out” to J$.)

Heather & Ainsley: F&FF Catfight Queens?

The other Heather and PAB scratched out! FNC chose the Carolina belles Heather Childers and Ainsley Earhardt to be the permanent co-hosts of Fox & Friends according to TVNewser. As to their former rotating fellow co-anchors, Heather Nauert has transitioned to be the quirky headline news reader on the new weekday Fox & Friends and Patti Ann Browne announced that she will do updates and hits and will guest anchor during the “dayside hours.”

Heather and Ainz can be proud of themselves: after all, they are the last ones standing from the originally proclaimed cast of ten (including not only their latest partners Heather N. and PAB but also FNC beauties Anna Kooiman, Juliet Huddy, Arthel Neville and Jamie Colby, and beasts Dave Briggs and Clayton Morris). Ainsley, especially, must feel giddy since she inaugurated this second version of the Fox & Friends First (with Anna) and is still heading the helm.

Unfortunately, the sapor of the show has changed from the time when Ainsley (and Anna) delivered on the promo to be a “shot of espresso” to rouse their viewers from their bed. Short skirts, flirty fun, and cheeky chats have given way too oft to more demure dress, insipid sobriety, and banal banter. Oops: from caffeine to decaf!

Congrats, Heather and Ainsley! Break a leg. And, spice it up!

[Author’s aside: “Catfight Queens”? Perhaps, if the ratings dip too much!]

Huddy: “On Oreilly every Wednesday.” Not!

[Updated, infra.] “Did You See That?” Fox & Friends First co-host Heather Nauert took Juliet Huddy‘s signature segment tonight on the O’Reilly Factor with nary a word of explanation from Bill (nor even a Tweet peep from Juliet).* In fact, when Bill introduced Heather to the absent Juliet’s “Did You See That?” audience (on CDC excessive alcohol use data), he simply said, “And, here now to explain further, Fox News correspondent Heather Nauert.” When Heather had finished opining and bantering with Bill, Bill presented the blond beauty further to his audience as a Fox & Friends First co-host on at 5:00 a.m.–the show that followed his own in its final airing of the night: But, no mention of Juliet.

Simply an oversight by “William” of his faithful friend? Perhaps. However, only yesterday, Juliet had confidently proclaimed, “On Oreilly [sic] every Wednesday” (when a Twitter follower had asked, “Where have you been…no more Oreilly or curvy couch?”). This Wednesday, she was nowhere to be found on O’Reilly: But, she was assuredly on Twitter, Tweeting thirteen missives–not a single one about her absence tonight.

O’Reilly Factor: Huddy out, Heather in? Stay tuned.

O’Reilly Factor – 08/21/13 (@ 8:49 p.m. ET)

Update: For the second week in a row (08/28/13), Huddy was still M.I.A.: America’s Newsroom co-anchor Martha MacCallum served instead as O’Reilly’s correspondent on “Did You See That?” Once again, Bill made no mention of Juliet on his show nor did Juliet provide any explanation via her Twitter chatter. O’Reilly Factor – 08/28/13 (11:49 p.m. ET).

Fox & Friends First Turns One: Growing Pains?

Co-host Ainsley Earhardt: “The four of us.”* F&FF‘s Big Love to less love? On March 5, 2013, Ainsley and her co-anchor Heather Nauert marked their first anniversary on the new Fox & Friends First with a much smaller family of co-hosts and a wiser (or, perhaps, more wizened) version of its younger self. Of the earlier stable of beauties (Anna Kooiman, Ainsley Earhardt, Juliet Huddy, Patti Ann Browne, Arthel Neville, Heather Childers, Heather Nauert, Julie Banderas, and Jamie Colby) and two beasts (Dave Briggs and Clayton Morris), only Ainsley, the two Heathers, and PAB survived the year. As to the show itself, it seems to be still evolving.

When F&FF made its debut [vid1], it proudly featured its “twin” sexy South Carolina sirens, Ainsley and Anna, who more than made good on their saucy promise to rouse their viewers with a “shot of expresso” [vid2].”  Bringing “SexyBack” a la the original F&FF [vid3] in the ’00’s (with Kiran Chetry, Alisyn Camerota, and Juliet Huddy), Anna and Ainsley saucily showcased their sexy stems in short dresses for their fervid fans as F&FF cameras took obligingly lingering shots. Subsequently, after two femme editors (1, 2) mocked the morning gamfest, they returned the very next day to a new set which hid their gorgeous gams behind a huge table: However, after the author derided them for “Losing Sexy Fast” and “Happening Not!,” F&FF switched course again and ditched the daffy desk.

Approximately, four months later, F&FF‘s website signaled that other changes were on the way when it provided only the bios of the current F&FF co-hosts, Ainsley, the two Heathers, and PAB. Subsequently, Juliet moved on to become a Fox 5 Good Day NY co-host; Arthel to her weekends as America’s News Headquarters co-anchor; Jamie Colby to her weekends also to America’s News HQ; and Clayton to his F&FW spot (and F&F guest co-host); and Dave ultimately to NBC Sports (with Michelle D. Beadle).

Re the programming itself, F&FF has ditched the split-screen opening with shots of the lovelies preparing for their show juxtaposed to the opining of Bill O’Reilly to conclude the Factor: in its place, F&FF producers run a modern-day version of American television viewers beginning their day to the national anthem and Old Glory waving in the wind before the programming begins. Mid-show, the gorgeous gals stretch their gams and stand rather than flaunt their legs and sit to proclaim the five important stories of the next half-hour. Furthermore, the “B Team” beauties no longer end their show with a segue to the F&F “A Team”: Rather, they bid their viewers adieu in lieu of risking another uncomfortable toss (“F&F Cat Spat: Gretch ‘Slimes’ the Two Heathers”).

Growing pains? Over the year, F&FF has pared its “perfect ten” to a “final four.” A winning team for the future?

[Author’s aside (re the subtitle): When Heather Nauert concluded F&FF‘s anniversary show, saying, “It’s always a great time together,” Ainsley answered, “The four of us.”]

F&FF’s Old Turkey: “Scrambled Up!”

Finally, thrown out? Thankfully, Fox & Friends First‘s awkward “Scrambled Up” signature sign-off seems to have surceased around Thanksgiving. After almost a month of its absence as the segue segment from F&FF to Fox & Friends, it seems safe to say that it has run its course. Now, there is no toss from F&FF co-hosts to their F&F counterparts: instead of the usual hand-off, the F&FF co-anchors crisply conclude their show and simply announce that F&F is next.

For FNC fans who have dreaded the tortured toss exchanges between the F&FF co-hosts and their Fox & Friends colleagues, the change is a welcome one. The F&FF ladies (Ainsley Earhardt, Heather Childers, Heather Nauert, and Patti Ann Browne) no longer have to play second fiddle to F&F diva Gretchen Carlson or her boys, Brian Kilmeade and Steve Doocy. In fact, they don’t have to play at all with their seemingly scornful sibs who appeared to disdain playing the “Scrambled Up!” jumble with their  F&FF “little sisters.”

Apparently, Ainz, PAB, and the two Heathers are all grown up now–and on their own. At last.

Doubly “Blessed” Ainsley: “It’s Official!!!”

Gets new hubby–and new job! Fox & Friends First co-host Ainsley Earhardt returned to her show today with a brand new lease on life. Last night, Ainsley announced via Twitter that she, Heather Childers, Heather Nauert, and Patti Ann Browne are now the “official” Fox & Friends First co-hosts. Today, she proclaimed on F&FF how “blessed” she was to have a “beautiful” new husband, former Clemson quarterback Will Proctor (as she shared wedding photos with her viewers mid-show).*

As Ainsley revealed to her Facebook friends, Ainsley got married to Will less than two weeks ago (October 13). Subsequently, the two lovers went on a romantic romp to an undisclosed location. But, Ainsley indicated that it would not be all fun and games: She Facebooked, “Even on our honeymoon, we are excited to watch the debate. Critical time for our great country!”

Congratulations, Ainsley, to you and Will! And, laurels, on your selection as official F&FF co-host!

[Author’s aside: Over three months ago, the author posited in Carpe Diem‘s “Fox & Friends First: The Four Now?” that the F&FF roster appeared to have been pared down to Ainsley, P.A.B., and the two Heathers. Happily, Ainsley finally confirmed it yesterday.]

*An earlier pic of the happy couple at the New York Junior League 58th Annual Winter Ball.

F&F’s “Sexy” Nauert: Distant But in Control

Waking up with Heather on the weekend. Leggy Fox & Friends First co-host Heather Nauert seized the F&F Weekend helm for Alisyn Camerota with gusto Sunday. But, instead of flaunting her gorgeous gams a la F&FF, the blond beauty seemed somewhat demure: Dressed in a short black dress and an “M&M” green jacket, Heather hid herself behind her open laptop for the day (as her co-hosts Clayton Morris and Dave Briggs provided her cover as they anomalously kept theirs studiously open as well).

Sexy or not, the girl still ruled the roost almost like a young E.D. Hill. Playing the needed F&FW “alpha bitch,” Heather had her boys going through their paces. Rarely stopping for breath, she was subtly hushing Dave with her hand at one moment and conspicuously instructing Clayton to elaborate at another.

Heather may have performed well today as a substitute with her co-hosts, Clayton and Dave: But, she could learn from Aly, the master, on how to awaken F&FW‘s fans. For FNC weekend viewers who are struggling mightily to escape the embrace of Morpheus, a softer, gentler greeting from a gorgeous gal is preferable to one from a Red-Bull-infused chatty Cathy. To boot, she may want to close the cloaking laptop as a general rule in the future: as Megyn Kelly aptly declared (about her America Live leg-displaying glass desk), “It’s a visual business. People want to see the anchor.”

F&F Cat Spat: Gretch “Slimes” the Two Heathers

Nauert: “She’s wrong for once.” Fox & Friends co-anchor Gretchen Carlson got rather perturbed at her fellow FNC blonde colleagues, F&F First co-hosts Heather Nauert and Heather Childers, for correcting her on air yesterday. In the “Scrambled Up!” segue (consisting of the jumbled letters of a word from a story in the show) from the early F&FF to F&F, Gretchen usually has found it frustrating and daunting: But, Monday she sat smug and confident before the two Heathers’ toss (of the letters, “m,” “l,” “e,” “i,” and “s”). Just not for long.

After F&FF‘s penultimate segment concluded, “The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly” segment, Nauert declared, “Okay, it’s time to get ‘Scrambled Up’ and Gretchen Carlson is here to help us.”

Grinning, Gretchen blurted, “I already know it: slime.”

“Slime?” queried Nauert, incredulously. Echoing her, Childers chimed, “Slime?”

Rolling her eyes at Gretchen’s answer, a smiling Nauert replied, “Noooo.”

After, possibly, getting the real answer in her ear, Gretchen rolled her shoulders, proclaiming, “It could be.” As Gretchen’s co-host Steve Doocy and Childers chorused “smile” in reply, Nauert charitably declared, “She’s wrong for once.”

Not willing to concedeto her F&F colleagues, Gretchen proudly insisted, “It could be slime.” Coming to her succor, Gretchen’s other co-host Brian Kilmeade inaccurately interjected, “It’s true.”

Looking through the camera at Gretchen with outstretched palms, Nauert confidently declared, “It’s ‘smile’!”

Mimicking Nauert’s body language, Gretchen defiantly shouted, “It could be ‘slime’!”

Compliantly, Nauert’s co-host Childers concurred, “It could have been ‘slime'”: Less deferential to her F&F elder, a seemingly sarcastic Nauert laughed, “It could be. Yes, yes. Very good, Gretchen!”

Having secured her possibly Pyrrhic victory for the moment, Gretchen riposted, “Okay. But, I’ll smile when I say it. Thanks, ladies!”

After that cat spat ended (and as F&FF ended and F&F began), Brian aptly asked, “Was slime in the show, though?” Ignoring his clear implication that she was wrong (since the answer has to have a word in the show itself), Gretchen blithely proclaimed, “That may be the first time that we’ve had a word that could be two words.”

[Author’s aside: Actually, Gretchen was right that the answer could have been two words: However, “slime” was not one of them. Both “smile” and “miles” were contained within the subtitles of F&FF stories (consecutive ones) less than ten minutes before “Scrambled Up”: “Smiles Not Always Contagious: Bosses Grin at Those Lower in Pecking Order” and “By the Numbers: 24 Miles, 4 Minutes, and 834 MPH” (about the space dive of “Fearless Felix”).*]

*Fox & Friends First – 10/15/12 (@ 5:51 a.m. ET)