Posts Tagged ‘FBN’

F&FW Bromances: “Man Up”

September 19, 2010

Rick: “Dave, you’re my BFF.” When Fox & Friends Weekend guest co-anchor Eric “Jock Rocks” Bolling told co-host Dave Briggs to “man up,” that was not necessarily what he had in mind. When the former Pittsburg Pirate (and FBN Money Rocks anchor) told Dave to do just that during an office nap story, he was merely ribbing him for his penchant for sleeping during the work day: he had no idea that it would be a clarion call for the celebration of F&FW bromances.

Subsequently, during a second-hour segment on new Oxford American Dictionary words (including “bromance” and “BFF”), co-host Alisyn Camerota kidded Dave that she witnessed a bromance between him and their vacationing F&FW co-anchor Clayton Morris on the curvy couch every Saturday and Sunday. When producers shortly thereafter showed a clip of “I Love You, Man,” F&FW weatherguy Rick Reichmuth dared to disclose that he had been on a man-date with co-anchor Clayton Morris to that very movie. When Dave teased him about his bromance with Clayton, Rick gamely remarked that that was when it began. Adding her feminine fuel to the fire, Aly jested about the bromance buds’ discomfort of sharing popcorn. Seeming to have had enough of the discussion of this type of Fox News male love, Eric stood up and said, “I’m outta of here!”And, he was. [Of course, he came back.]

Later, bromance was in the air anew in the final hour as the co-hosts discussed the latest O.A.D. entries. Once again, Aly piqued Dave, joshing, “Well, bromance is obviously something you live every day, the bromance.”** Almost aping a schoolyard taunt, Dave lamely retorted, “And, your BFF, Rick.” As Eric groaned, “Oh, my goodness!,” Dave continued, “Is Rick your BFF? Or, does it have to be a female?” Meanwhile, Rick appeared in a split screen with the trio of co-hosts as Aly explained, “It has to be a girl.” Grinning, Rick interposed, “Dave, you’re my BFF.” As Eric smiled, rolled his eyes, and shook his head in disbelief,” a dimpled Dave declared, “Aww, I appreciate it, Ricky.”

Eric: not so much.

*Fox & Friends – 09/19/10 (@9:33 a.m. ET)


Viagra Rejuvenates F&F

August 9, 2010

Kilmeade: “Sure to get a rise out of you.” Fox & Friends co-anchors Gretchen Carlson, Brian Kilmeade, and Peter Johnson, Jr., titillated rising viewers with double entendres aplenty this morning. During F&F’s “‘Right’ to Subsidized Viagra” segment, the three got a little frisky with FBN anchor Stuart Varney.

Introducing the segment, Gretchen guffawed, “One teachers union in Milwaukee is demanding that taxpayers pony up public dollars for private business. They say they have the right to free Viagra, and they’re suing the school system to get it. Stu, this is one of those amazing stories that woke me up this morning.”*

Before Stuart could give his contrary take, a bawdy Brian interjected, “Sure to get a rise out of you.” As Gretchen snickered off-camera, an incredulous Stewart laughed, “What!” Then, he added, “Cue that sound effect.” Joining the ribald revelry, Peter jested, “No, it’s a stimulus, isn’t it?” while producers added their own purported phallic phoenix audio.

As the carnal banter began to subside, ironically, then the excitement really started as Peter roused Stuart with his seeming advocacy of the mandated coverage of the male stimulant. As Stuart bemoaned the possibility of taxpayers having to pay for Viagra for teachers based on  “gender discrimination,” Peter remarked, “They’re saying women teachers have estrogen cream. And, then men are saying, ‘We should have Viagra, Cialis, and Levitra.’ So you’re…against them?”

Stuart exclaimed, “This is not a legal issue!” Countering, Peter declared, “Well, it’s a moral issue.” Stuart conceded, “A moral issue and a financial issue.” Sounding almost facetious, Peter persisted, “Don’t you want these people to be happy, Stuart?” Stuart rejoined, “Wait a minute, I know…you’re trying to get me going. I am not rising to the bait.” Peter chuckled, “No, I’m not. Not at all.”

Later in the discussion, it really got animated between Peter and Stuart when Peter asked, “Should we be deciding what prescriptions our public teachers get?” Looking at Peter with disdain, Stuart retorted, “Are you a lawyer?” Interjecting, Brian answered, “Yes, yes, he is.” Rhetorically, Stuart replied, “He is?” Biting back, Peter queried, “Are you a doctor?” Turning to Peter, Stuart snapped, “Don’t you think that in America we’re fed up with the rule of lawyers as opposed to the rule of law?

Responding somewhat softly, Peter asked, “What about the rule of people who want to have children? What if a man can’t achieve…potency?” As Stuart stared in disbelief and scratched his head in utter bemusement, Peter continued, “No, I’m serious. Are you going to decide, Stuart Varney, what drugs our public employees get? Exasperated, Stuart riposted, “Where’s Steve!” As Brian and Gretchen screamed with laughter and the floor crew roared in amusement, a soft-spoken Peter insisted, “So, seriously.”

Viagra: bringing serious fun back to F&F fans.

*Fox & Friends – 08/09/10 (@6:39 a.m. ET)

Update: Video (via Johnny Dollar’s Place)

Jenna Happening Now

July 8, 2010

Fox Business News babe Jenna Lee has been chosen to replace the departed Jane Skinner as co-host Fox of News’ Happening Now effective July 12 (Monday) according to TVNewser.* Ben Stein’s favorite money honey, the “heart-stoppingly beautiful, ultrayoung and cute Jenna,” is no stranger to HN as a contributor and has exhibited there her sassy, sexy side that may bode well for HN. Even though Jenna does not provide much needed literal color to Fox News’ morning co-host palette, hopefully, Jenna will add a new vivid, vibrant hue to FNC’s most boring morning show.

Good luck, Jenna!

*‘s Jason Raznick broke the bare-bones story as to Jenna’s apparent selection.

What’s “Happening Now”?

June 24, 2010

N’awlin’s Chocolate: a new morning flavor for FNC’s ice cream parlor? Something seemed slightly amiss today as Happening Now co-host Jane Skinner announced her sudden departure from the show while citing the, yes, “spend-more-time-with-the-family” reason. While her co-host Jon Scott was rather tearful and her colleague Janice Dean was exceedingly dolorous at the news, Jane remained studiedly stoic like a good soldier who had received her walking papers. And, maybe, she had.

One month ago today, stated that FNC honcho Roger Ailes and his top FBN suits had “convened in a room [about a week earlier] to watch the network’s broadcast…to examine the programming in detail and see what was working and what might need changing or tweaking.” Apparently, Ailes and his top people may have looked at their golden goose FNC, too, and watched its most boring morning hour. Approximately two weeks later, reported that Ailes was bringing back the sassy, sexy ebony beauty Arthel Neville (daughter of the founder of the Neville Bros.) back to FNC. Today, as to Jon’s new co-host, mused, “Maybe a non-white anchor?”

Perhaps, Fox News SVP of Programming Bill Shine will use this opportunity to add some much overdue figurative and literal color to FNC’s most boring morning news show. As Carpe Diem readers may remember, the author has long felt that Happening Now needed a major shake-up. E.g., over six months ago, in an article entitled “Jon & Jane: Happening Not,” the author opined, “[T]he show with David Asman’s ‘tv twin’ and Roger Goodell’s gal seems to be an ill-conceived paean to America’s bourgeois best. After an entertaining and edgy Fox & Friends…FNC seems to have plopped the vanilla couple in the middle of the morning when the majority of their more adventurous audience is apt to roam….Bill [Shine], you surely need to do something to make Happening Now actually happen soon.” Even Jane seems to agree that she was not necessarily the most charismatic media figure on FNC: in an interview with (after telling HN viewers good-bye), she stated, “I worked for five bosses before Roger, not one, including all of my professors at journalism school, said, ‘you have a personality, you should use it.’”

Hopefully, Shine will add some real color commentary to Happening Now–from a person of color. Over two years ago, the author similarly bemoaned the incredible lack of diversity on another FNC morning show in a May 4, 2008, post entitled, “Lily White F&F” to no avail. Hopefully, times have changed.

Chris: Childish Aly?

June 11, 2010

Wallace, still chafing at Camerota for her “sleeping on the couch” question? Last Sunday before Fox News Sunday anchor Chris Wallace’s promo for his program on Fox & Friends Weekend, producers played a short clip of Chris “hitting on” country music singer Kellie Pickler and her racy response the previous Friday. Afterwards, F&FW co-host Alisyn Camerota queried, “Let’s bring in Chris Wallace right now to find out if he has been sleeping on the couch since that time. Chris, what did Mrs. Wallace have to say?” Even though Chris seemed to welcome the opportunity to apprise the audience that he was not in trouble with his wife Lorraine, he may not have been amused by Aly’s choice of words.

Today, as Chris did his FNS preview on F&F (with co-anchor, Brian Kilmeade, and guest hosts, Alisyn Camerota and Eric Bolling), Chris seemed to take a snipe at Aly instead of his usual target F&F co-anchor Brian Kilmeade. After Brian had briefly introduced Chris for his FNS preview, Chris acerbically joked, “You know, I have to say, watching the three of  you this morning, the idea that any network would put a show on in which Brian Kilmeade is the grownup is kind of…just asking for trouble right there.”

Surprised, a smiling Eric Bolling, host of the upcoming prime time FBN program, Money Rocks, who appeared to be Chris’ collateral damage, softly uttered, “Wow!” Deftly and adroitly, Aly answered, “Oh, we resemble that remark, Chris.” Happy to have someone else take the brunt of Chris’ barbs, Brian riantly exclaimed, “I actually think it’s the first time someone else has been dissed by Chris Wallace with me on the couch. And, you guys actually took it worse!”

Perhaps, Aly has learned her lesson to be not too impertinent to Mr. Wallace. Or, maybe, next time she will simply display a little more cleavage a la Kellie Pickner last Friday. Or, as Gretchen suggests, don one of those sexy cowboy hats that Chris likes.

Remember, Aly: to paraphrase Hank Williams, Jr., a country girl can survive.

“Certainly, it’s not [BP’s] Fault”

June 10, 2010

Who said it? No, not BP CEO Tony Hayward but Fox & Friends contributor and FBN reporter Ashely Webster! During an F&F segment concerning the danger of BP going bankrupt, co-anchor Brian Kilmeade asked, “Ashley, do we have to be careful now politically and out in public with our statements at the highest level in ripping BP? Should we moderate some of our criticism in order to sustain the company?”*

Beginning quite reasonably, Webster answered, “No, I don’t think so. I mean, obviously, BP didn’t want this to happen. It’s the last thing in the world they wanted to happen but they certainly haven’t helped themselves with the way they responded initially. And, CEO Tony Heyward, of course, saying, ‘This is the worst day of my life’ and, so on, certainly did not come across very well at all.” Unfortunately for Webster, he did not stop there.

Sounding almost like a BP shill, he continued, “You know, BP is one of many of the major oil companies that do this type of exploration around the world to satisfy our thirst for oil.” Then, he incredibly concluded, “And, certainly, it’s not their fault but the way they’ve handled it hasn’t been great at all.” Shockingly, as the segment ended, F&F’s co-hosts (Brian, Steve Doocy, and Alisyn Camerota) uttered not a word of disagreement.

Perhaps, that Fox & Friends’ segment should have been entitled “Hayward’s Wet Dream.”

*Fox & Friends – 06/10/10 (@7:02 a.m. ET)

Ailes’ Virgin Vixen?

May 10, 2010

Gerri Willis: CNN cloistered cutie to FBN femme fatale? Roger Ailes’ latest CNN snatch made her virgin appearance on Red Eye Saturday night. From the moment host Greg Gutfeld heralded her first appearance on RE, Gerri seemed timid, stiff, and stilted as she warily navigated RE‘s Kafkaesque labyrinth.

Further, the future Willis Report anchor inexplicably botched her chance to shine as to the big biz question of the day. When, during the RE “Halftime Report,” Andy Levy asked, “Gerri, what exactly happened with the stock market today?,” she, stating the obvious, replied, “It went down.”* As Andy motioned for more, Gerri simplistically answered, “It went down big time.” In response, Andy acerbically sniped, “Wow! I really want to demand Fox Business now.” Smiling abashedly, Gerri responded, “Oh, why am I here?” Subsequently, when Andy asked again, a flustered Gerri declared, “I was warned about this and I didn’t listen. I came anyway. And, now I am so mad at myself.”

At that moment, perhaps, Fox News and Fox Biz boss Roger Ailes had his own second thoughts about Gerri. When he announced her hiring, he stated, “Most of the CNN talent have been restrained from showing what they can do — we’re looking forward to providing Gerri with a platform at Fox Business to showcase her financial acumen and television expertise.” Maybe, Gerri is still finding her sea legs. Speaking of which, perhaps, next time Greg will give her the vaunted “leg chair” and Gerri can start to adapt  (a la Patti Ann Brown) to her new station on the U.S.S. Roger Ailes.

The transformation of this former Jon Klein girl-in-chains may take some time.

*Red Eye – 05/09/10 (12:32 a.m. ET).

[Editorial aside: As to Andy’s saying “today” when speaking of the stock market decline, apparently, he was referring to RE‘s production date (Friday) not its airing one (Sunday).”]

Nicole: Exhibitionist Angel?

April 26, 2010

Confessions of Nicole Petallides? Ever since Carpe Diem reported that Nicole heated up the Fox & Friends set by seemingly hiking her skirt twice for her Fox & Friends Weekend fans (October 11, 2009), the Foxy FBN correspondent has appeared to be almost persona non grata on FBN’s big sister network FNC. However, Nicole did make a rare appearance about three months later on Red Eye (January 9, 2010) where she kidded about being an “exhibitionist.”* Also, she returned once to F&FW (March 7, 2010) for a jobs report segment with co-host Dave Briggs: Nevertheless, for almost the entire interview, the producers appeared to studiously keep the chyron up to occlude a view of her legs (a la Elvis on the Ed Sullivan Show).**

What has become of this too-hot-for-FNC correspondent? Last Thursday and Friday, the Greek goddess who graces the New York Stock Exchange floor clad in quite conservative attire for FBN’s Countdown to the Closing Bell (CCB) guest-hosted on FBN’s Happy Hour with regular Rebecca Diamond nee Gomez and fill-in Sandra Smith for a special “Ladies’ Night” edition. Venus was reborn.

On Thursday, all three were such a distaff delight with their obvious smarts, informed analyses, and sexy short skirts that Happy Hour producers introduced the trio after one commercial break as “Foxy’s Angels” to the voice of John Forsythe and the theme song and graphics of Charlie’s Angels.*** A flattered Nicole remarked, “Can we see it again? Can we see it again between now and the end of the show? It went so fast!”

Similarly, Nicole’s F&FW admirers must be asking, “When can we see you again?”

*Red Eye – 01/09/10 (@3:04 a.m. ET): In a segment on a study that showed a cocaine vaccine made the addicts crave cocaine more, RE host Greg Gutfeld said, “What kind of behavior would you like to stop if there were a vaccine?” Nicole replied, “If I had a vaccine for myself? Um. Exhibitionist? Then, when Greg goatishly asked, “Really?” Nicole “innocently” answered, “No, no. Chocoholic?” Gutfeld sidekick Bill Shulz rakishly remarked, “Let’s get back to the other one!” Trying to tamp down the testosterone just a tad, Nicole riantly responded, “No, no, no, no. But this vaccine’s unbelievable….”I’m all for sex, drugs, and alcohol, and lots of fun but not ones that put you on your deathbed. Right? Or, make you go broke!”

**Fox & Friends – 03/07/10 (@9:06 a.m. ET)

***Happy Hour – 04/22/10 (@5:22 p.m. ET)

Nicole’s Legs: 2 Hot 4 F&FW?

October 11, 2009

FBN anchor Nicole Petallides was definitely in the Fox & Friends Weekend house this morning. With two different hikes of her skirt she let every red-blooded male viewer know that she was not only there but she was burning it down to boot. In fact, she apparently got a little too hot for the chyron, too.

When co-anchor Clayton Morris eagerly introduced Nicole in F&FW’s first business segment, guest co-host Mike Jerrick stood and gushed, “Oh, there’s Nicole! Ooh, great to see you. Great to meet you! Goodness gracious!” Smiling broadly, she responded, “How are you guys? Good morning!” As she sat down, she pulled back her knee-length dress to more flatteringly reveal her long legs. Subsequently, the camera took appreciative shots of her sexy stems throughout the interview. As that segment ended and co-anchor Alisyn Camerota asked Nicole to stay for another one, the Greek goddess raised the ante and her hem higher, teasing her co-hosts and viewers with a very generous view of her gams.

Apparently, too high for F&FW this morning! When the second segment resumed (with a one-on-one with Mike), the camera generally zoomed in on Nicole’s face or the chyron was kept up, overtly obscuring her lovely legs for most of the interview. But not from Mike’s gaze. As he concluded the segment, he grasped her arm and randily remarked, “This is one that I appreciate. Thank you to Clayton and Aly for just letting us spend some time alone on the couch.” Nicole flirted, “I know. This is really fun.” Interjecting, Clayton commented, “Human resources just called,” and Aly deadpanned, “We’re calling security.”

Once again, Nicole, you got the F&F lads all addled.

Megyn Drills Hemmer

December 18, 2008

America’s Newroom co-host Megyn Kelly brooks balderdash from no one. Not from O’Reilly. Not even her co-host Bill Hemmer.

During a Bernie Madoff story with FBN’s Cheryl Casone, FNC ran vid of the Ponzi schemer aggressively walking through a throng of reporters trying to get home: Hemmer intimated that Madoff might be guilty of assault. After the segment ran, Megyn looked at Hemmer and incredulously asked, “Assault? What was he supposed to do?”

Not expecting Megyn’s challenge, Hemmer stammered around and then ranted, “My point is I cannot for the life of me understand this man’s behavior…To walk down a sidewalk the was he was, it blows my mind. This guy has no conscience. He has gone to the edge.” Megyn calmly countered, “That’s irrelevant. If he did this, he’s a dirtbag. But why doesn’t he have the right to walk down the street with the paparazzi in his face, with the reporters not letting him shut the door of his car?” She concluded, “You save your outrage for the people he defrauded, not for that.”

Poor Bill didn’t expect to get his knuckles rapped by Megyn. He should have: in Megyn’s classroom, logic holds sway.

Finally, Directv FNCHD! [Update]

October 26, 2008

Update: What is the deal? This morning Directv’s FNC seems to be back in non-HD. Last night when I began to praise, apparently, prematurely FNC’s debut in HD, I TiVo’d Geraldo Rivera’s show to make sure I wasn’t seeing things. When I deleted it, the percentage available regained on my DVR indicated that it was indeed in HD. Today has been another story altogether.

2B FNCHD, or not 2B FNCHD? That is the question.

Earlier entry:

Today FNC finally went high def on Directv. For forebearing fans of FNC, it is indeed about time: The cable news network has inexplicably long ceded video superiority to CNN on Directv. Even when Rupert Murdoch’s News Corp. controlled the satellite television company, Fox News did not avail itself of an HD channel even though its main competitor CNN did. With the recent debut of its new sister cable business news network FBN in HD, Fox News’ must have been shamed by its inferior visual content. Apparently, a little sibling rivalry did the trick.

Now when switching from a CNN program to an FNC one, the viewer will not feel as if his/her contacts got cloudy. For male fans of cable news eye candy, e.g., Alisyn Camerota, Megyn Kelly, and Domenica Davis, it will be sweeter. Yes, girls, you can see your favorite gents better too.

Gretch Not Enough: F&F Newsreader Needed

July 17, 2008

Gretch is not enough! Fox & Friends urgently needs a new newsreader. Without Aly, the trio of Gretchen Carlson, Steve Doocy, Brian Kilmeade are, as Barack Obama might say, watchable “enough.” Without Alisyn Camerota (reportedly moved to F&F Weekend), F&F desparately requires a sexy, savvy lass to reinvigorate the show. Otherwise, there may be more than a few migrations to CNN’s American Morning with the eminently watchable Kiran Chetry.

Suggestion: Bring in FBN’s Greek goddess Nicole Petallides, spicy siren Rebecca Gomez, or someone similar.

Ms. Rodney Dangerfield

July 11, 2008

Poor Gretch! Jack-of-all-trades Ben Stein, author of “How to Ruin the United States of America,” dissed the Fox & Friends co-host today. As she introduced Stein for his segment, he said, “I’m happy to be here: I’m happy to be near Jenna Lee.” Trying to be sporting, Gretch responded, “Hell, yeah!” In an attempt to sidetrack Stein, Steve Doocy said, “He loves this studio because it’s red, white, and blue, and his new book is all about patriotism.” Stein responded, “I love it because it’s near Jenna Lee.” (Jenna Lee is the attractive auburn-haired FBN morning business co-anchor in the nearby studio.)

In the interview, however, Gretch got a measure of revenge. After Stein told Dave Briggs that he agreed to an extent with Phil Gramm’s assertion that America was “a country of whiners” and as he enumerated examples for Steve Doocy how he himself was a whiner on personal matters, the scorned shiksa added, “That you can’t sit next to Jenna Lee.” Stein replied, “Yes, exactly.”

Gretch Dangerfield: She get’s no respect!

Ainsley Who?

June 29, 2008

FBN’s Jenna Lee is today’s mistress of the Fox & Friends Weekend house. As the attractive brunette was introduced by Clayton Morris, no mention was made of Ainsley Earhardt’s absence. Then the graphics guys flashed Jenna’s name several extra times at the bottom of the screen to let the viewer know who today’s girl is: Fox News does not need to tell audience about changes only that they’ve been made. Where is the sweet Southern praline? Hmm. No sugar today: only Splenda Lee.

Jenna Lee or Ainsley?

June 27, 2008

Inside Cable News is reporting that FBN’s Jenna Lee will be co-hosting Fox & Friends Weekend according to FTVLive. However, as Alisyn Camerota promoted F&FW at the end of today’s program, Dave Briggs said that it would be he, Ainsley Earhardt, and Clayton Morris tomorrow. It appears that they may both be right: according to the FNCTV schedule, Ainsley is slated for Saturday and Jenna Lee is listed for Sunday.


FBN: Foxy Biz News

May 28, 2008

Hottie FBN Nicole Petallides made Fox and Friends First’s bad housing price news (largest decline year to year in twenty years) sound good–or, at least, look good. As she opined about the implications thereof, the camera man had a difficult time keeping the camera steady. Understandably, he kept trying to keep the blonde Greek goddess’ gams well within the frame as Steve Doocy interviewed her. Although he was successful, he did so in a rather jerky fashion throughout the segment. However, I can’t blame the poor chap: I was distracted, too.

For the reader who does not know who this sexy siren and morning FBN anchor is, the following links have been provided.

Bratz Spank Barbie

April 21, 2008

According to Fox News today, Mattel’s Barbie is being spanked by the Bratz dolls, her competition made by MGA Entertainment. Jane Skinner, co-host of FNC’s Happening Now, decided to remind the viewer of Barbie’s roots. [According to Salon, Barbie was based on Lilli, an adult doll made in Hamburg, Germany, (a city with a legal yet legendary red-light district) and based on a Deutsche demimondaine in a Bild Zeitung cartoon.] Skinner introduced the segment, saying, “Barbie’s sales are flat unlike her chest…those Bratz dolls…are giving Barbie some…stiff competition: Jenna Lee has been hard at work on this one this morning.” FBN’s Jenna Lee responded, “I have been hard at work at this one” and added, “Barbie sales are flat and…we see some stiff competiton from the Bratz dolls that are a little bit more risque.” No double entendres there.