Posts Tagged ‘Cialis’

Shep de Sade: Kubrick’s Clare Quilty?

August 12, 2010

The Marquis is back! However, Studio B‘s Shepard Smith de Sade reappeared as the spent, jaded Clare Quilty as he reran his evil tired tripe, i.e., the Trampoline Bear video today. He seemed almost desperate to find anew that thrill that now eluded him and that Viagra could not even bring back. With a stone face and a monotone delivery, he announced, “Bear Alert.”*

Before polluting Fox News’ airwaves again with his favorite animal cruelty cine, he showed an adorable black bear cub chowing down on garbage in a Georgia driveway. After doing so, he cautioned, “While cute, the local sheriff is warning residents ‘do not leave food out for the bears.'” Then, as he aired once again the Trampoline Bear clip (of a black bear falling from a tree onto a trampoline, being propelled high into the air, and then crashing headfirst into the ground), Shep cackled, “And, of course, trampolines are always–ha, ha, ha, ha, ha–trampolines are always a great deterrent.”

Poor Shepard Smith was more of a sad spectacle today than even his Trampoline Bear.

Update: Perhaps, Shep changed his prescription to Cialis or Levitra after Studio B. For his Fox Report, he tried again to find his thrill and prematurely injected his “Bear Alert” at mid-show.** However, this time he seemed to, at least, fake a bit more enthusiasm as the video climaxed, as almost verbatim he repeated, “And, of course, trampolines are always an excellent deterrent.”

*Studio B with Shepard Smith – 08/12/10 (@3:59 p.m. ET)

**Fox Report with Shepard Smith – 08/12/10 (@7:29 p.m. ET)

E.D.? A.M. Viagra

May 7, 2009

With co-anchor John Roberts away, the girls will play! As American Morning opened it’s early erectile-dysfunction-commercial-regulation segment to the thumping beat of AC/DC’s “Hard as a Rock,” the camera lovingly surveyed it’s co-host honeys, Kiran Chetry and Carol Costello, from various angles and then finally zoomed in. Grinning broadly, Carol Costello placed her hand to her mouth and said, “So wrong on so many levels: The choice of songs which you’ll understand in just a minute.” Struggling to keep a straight face, Kiran facetiously replied, “Yeah, but they have nothing to do with the stories: It’s just, you know, it’s a, it’s a real, it’s a random selection.” Rolling her eyes, Carol responded “Yes! Sure!”

Of course, Kiran then segued to Jim Moran’s attempt to ban daytime e.d. ads, e.g., Levitra, Viagra, and Cialis. No nexus indeed! Just AM executive producer Janelle Rodriguez spicing it up!