Posts Tagged ‘Barbie’

Megyn & Ken N HD

March 24, 2009

On the second day of America’s Newroom HD, co-host Bill Hemmer asked, “How do we look in HD?” after watching a Politico clip of Family Guy where the Fox News anchor hottie becomes a nottie after the switch to HD. Co-anchor Megyn Kelly interjected, “I don’t know who thought of HD but it definitely was not somebody who was an on-camera person: It was some sadistic person who just wanted to torture us!” Moreover, she modestly remarked, “Must you have the anchors in HD? The soft blur is so much more forgiving.”

For the self-proclaimed Ken and Barbie, the change has been good. Like the boy doll, Bill is handsome and a good accessory. Like America’s Bild Lilli, Megyn is the busty, bronzed blonde with gams galore and perfect hair: HD has tortured neither.

No worries, Megyn: No forgiving needed.

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Talking Barbie

July 5, 2008

Maxim model and Fox & Friends Weekend newsreader Courtney Friel coined a neologism, “uncompopously” today. In a segment on Jesse Helms’ death, she read, “Foes remember him as an uncompar [sic], uncompopously [sic] defiant man.” Whatever. Stupid writers. Apparently, F&FW’s Barbie in yet another midi meant “uncompromisingly.” No more hard words for Courtney: the chastened headline news readers changed the text. Now Jesse Helms was not an uncompromisingly defiant man” to his foes but a “tenacious opponent.” What were you thinking, you F&FW pedantic penners?

Barbie Runs 4 Prez

June 29, 2008

Today Fox & Friends newreader Courtney Friel took a page out of Hillary Clinton’s fashion bible. In her gray pantsuit, Barbie shows her Presidential candidate look. Barbie can be anything that she wants to be: astronaut, doctor, supermodel, and, yes, President. However, the wardrobes are not equally flattering: today, the poor lass looks like she had a late night on the town and threw on her sweats when the doorbell rang. Being eye candy is not easy!

Bratz Spank Barbie

April 21, 2008

According to Fox News today, Mattel’s Barbie is being spanked by the Bratz dolls, her competition made by MGA Entertainment. Jane Skinner, co-host of FNC’s Happening Now, decided to remind the viewer of Barbie’s roots. [According to Salon, Barbie was based on Lilli, an adult doll made in Hamburg, Germany, (a city with a legal yet legendary red-light district) and based on a Deutsche demimondaine in a Bild Zeitung cartoon.] Skinner introduced the segment, saying, “Barbie’s sales are flat unlike her chest…those Bratz dolls…are giving Barbie some…stiff competition: Jenna Lee has been hard at work on this one this morning.” FBN’s Jenna Lee responded, “I have been hard at work at this one” and added, “Barbie sales are flat and…we see some stiff competiton from the Bratz dolls that are a little bit more risque.” No double entendres there.

http://www.salon.com/mwt/feature/1997/11/26harlot.html