Shep’s Trampoline Bear: Ole Miss Mascot?

“The Bear Alert to end all Bear Alerts.” Hoddy Toddy! Yesterday Ole Miss alum Shepard Smith gleefully celebrated the fall of his beloved Ole Miss’ new mascot yesterday on his show Studio B. Before doing so in his final segment, Shep announced,  “Now the mother of all ‘Bear Alerts.’ Get used to the bear. It’s the granddaddy of all ‘Bear Alerts.'”* He added, “The ‘Bear Alert’ to end all ‘Bear Alerts.” [Hopefully, it was.]

Proudly, Shep reported, “You see, a certain university in a certain Southern state has now chosen a new mascot [with] 62% of the vote. And, with that we present the Ole Miss Rebel Black Bear.” Subsequently, he showed depictions of the new mascot in a basketball uniform, football jersey, and frat-boy coat and tie. As he devilishly intoned, “As we all know, our bear will be most comfortable,” the Trampoline Bear video began to run. Perhaps, in poetic justice, just before the black bear plunged head-first into the ground and crumpled under its own weight, Shep began, “That’s the Rebel Bear bouncing on the trampoline: then he exclaimed, “Hotty Toddy! Beat Alabama!”

If that is indeed the Rebel Bear, Bama head coach Nick Saban may want to borrow Shep’s Trampoline Bear video. It might do wonders to fire up his players and the fans before the big game Saturday. In fact, all of Ole Miss’ future opponents make want to take note. Bear alert!

*Studio B with Shepard Smith – 10/14/10 (@3:58 p.m.)

Related stories (in chronological order) are as follow:
Shep’s Trampoline Bear: PETA MIA” (June 7, 2010);”
Banderas’ “Teachable Moment’?” (July 25, 2010); ”
Banderas Responds: Bars Bear Vid” (June 27, 2010);
Banderas Recants Apology” (June 27, 2010);
Shep de Sade” (July 28, 2010);
Banderas: ‘Not My Fault’” (August 3, 2010);
Shep de Sade’s Bad Boys” (August 7, 2010);
Shep de Sade: Kubrick’s Clare Quilty” (August 12, 2010);
Shep Defends Trampoline Bear Video” (August 13, 2010);
The Good Shepard?” (August 20, 2010; and
The Good Shepard Hydes” (August 26, 2010).

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7 Responses to “Shep’s Trampoline Bear: Ole Miss Mascot?”

  1. The Original Bear Says:

    Ole Shep needs to bear in mind that after last week’s debacle at Columbia, the mighty Red Elephant is embarrassed, angry and shall take out their wrath by bearing down upon Ole Miss this Saturday in such way that will make the trampoline bear’s injuries seem tame.

    And that’s with or without the new bear mascot.

  2. As a Dog Returns to Its Vomit « Carpe Diem Says:

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  3. Bob Says:

    The black bear sure got upended again today

  4. Hope Springs Eternal « Carpe Diem Says:

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  5. Ole Miss’ Colonel Shep « Carpe Diem Says:

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