Hemmer’s Cryptic Condolences to MacCallum

Martha’s secret pain revealed. Yesterday, America’s Newsroom co-host Bill Hemmer offered his heartfelt sympathy to his grateful co-anchor Martha MacCallum without any explanation as the show ended. Similarly, Martha provided her own emotional enigmatic aside four days earlier in a Tweet, simply saying, “Thanks for your kind notes.” For AN viewers and Martha’s other fans who were left in the dark, Carpe Diem discovered the secret source of her pain.

When a CD reader asked the author what tragedy had befallen Martha after AN had aired, the author decided to find out. In his research, he detected the answer from a funeral home obit in Martha’s small hometown of Wyckoff, New Jersey (population of 16,696): It was for a certain Elizabeth Jane Bowes MacCallum who had died on April 14.

In the Wyckoff Vander Plaat Funeral Home encomium, Elizabeth MacCallum is described as the loving wife of her college sweetheart, Douglas C. MacCallum, Jr., of 57 years: But, more pertinently, for the Carpe Diem reader, it reveals that she was the devoted mother of three daughters, including Martha MacCallum Gregory. (Martha is married to Gregory Packaging Director and Vice-President Daniel John Gregory.) Reaffirming the obvious, Martha’s New York Times wedding announcement clearly evinces that the aforementioned Elizabeth B. MacCallum of Wyckoff, N.J. (and wife of Douglas C. MacCallum, Jr.) is the now deceased mother of Martha.

Condolences from this CD author, too, Martha!

Update: On the elder Ms. MacCallum’s online obit, there is a pic of Martha flanked by her two sisters seemingly: A loop of the family photos including Martha can be found at the top of the page on the left-hand side next to a “Click her to light a Memorial CANDLE” chyron.

How Dana Perino Found Love: On the Fly!

“True story!” America’s Newsroom co-host Bill Hemmer revealed how his FNC colleague Five co-anchor Dana Perino found her hubby Peter McMahon. After an AN story on a website that told singles where the best place to find their “soul mates” last week (March 27), Bill remarked, “How many people do you know…[who]…meet a partner on an airplane and they get married? It happens!”* Shaking her head incredulously, his AN guest co-anchor Alisyn Camerota replied, “Zero!”

In riposte, Bill declared, “Zero? I do! I know several people, actually. Dana Perino is one of ‘em!” Her face suddenly brightening, Aly gasped, “That’s right! I did know that.” Smiling triumphantly, Bill responded, “True story! See? I bring you the truth here, kid.”

A mile-high romance: “How Peter met Dana.”

*America’s Newsroom – 03/27/13 (@10:39 a.m. ET)

Aly in Red: Naked Again!

Rocking and ringless anew? Sexy Fox & Friends Weekend co-anchor Alisyn Camerota guest-hosted America’s Newsroom in a state of connubial dishabille yesterday. Filling in for AN co-host Martha MacCallum (who also has had her own “ringless” AM moments), Aly sported a demure fire-red dress with tanned-nude high heels to match sans wedding band.* Sitting beside her co-anchor Bill Hemmer, a lovely Aly appeared unencumbered, embodying DeBurgh’s lovely lady in red.

As long-time F&FW fans may remember, Aly interrupted her five-month abdication of her throne in 2011 to guest-host F&F weekday on July 10, 2011. While doing so, the Bohemian beauty ditched her marital band and rocked out during Loverboy’s live rendition of “Working for the Weekend” in her “‘hep’ headband and a matching wristband” atop the shoulders of an appreciative co-anchor Brian Kilmeade.** Since Carpe Diem chronicled that festive event (Aly’s Back: She’s Rocking–& Ringless), she has dutifully adorned herself in her connubial bond to hubby Tim Lewis.

“Lady in Red”: naked again! Tethered or not, Aly’s never “shine(d) so bright.”

*America’s Newsroom – 03/27/13 (vid – 2:47/5:35)

**Fox & Friends – 06/10/11 (vid – 1:59/4:13)

Martha: “My Sweetheart” Birthday Bill

Fanning the flame? America’s Newsroom co-anchor Martha MacCallum seemed to enjoy stoking rumors of romance between herself and co-host Bill Hemmer yesterday. Only two weeks after she and Bill said that they did not want to talk about people thinking that they were married (on Fox News Radio’s Kilmeade & Friends), Martha appeared more than happy to give their fans more grist for the rumor mill with a flirty final segment yesterday.*

As she and Bill returned from ad break for their last block of the day,  Martha cooed, “So, Bill, my dear, we’ve been talking all day about how it’s a kind of special day here in America’s Newsroom: And, that is because it is young Bill Henner’s “Happy Birthday.” Handing a cupcake with a lit single candle to a smiling Bill, she lilted, “Happy birthday to you, my sweetheart.”

Looking at her with an almost childlike astonishment, Bill exclaimed, “And, you know, you got the icing right because it’s blue!”

Smiling, Martha replied, “It is blue, and that’s your favorite. And, we knew that!” Continuing her birthday tribute to the birthday boy, she declared, “But, we want to thank Mr. and Mrs. Hemmer for bringing Billy into the world just a few years ago. No, we don’t have to say how many. But…you look great!” Giggling, Martha asked, “Is that a comfort?”

Chuckling, he jested, “Thank you! And, I still act and I feel twenty-five so I think that’s going to get me a little bit on the line.”

Looking down at his still lit cupcake, Bill more solemnly said, “So, I just want to make a wish here real quick: And, this will be a ‘Fox News Alert.’ But, I’m not going to tell you!”

Lowering his head toward his cupcake, Bill blew on the flame of the candle. Flickering for a moment, it came back to life. Grinning, Bill exclaimed, “What is this! What is it! Magic candles! We did this…when we were in third grade.”

Excitedly, Martha pleaded, “Blow it out! Blow it out! Keep going. You’ve got thirty seconds!”

As Bill obeyed and blew the flame out quickly, a now more platonic Martha said, “So you made a wish, and I hope it comes true, Buddy.” Giving him a high five, she intoned, “This year!”

Bill’s secret birthday desire? Martha seems to know. For fans, Bill’s personal “Fox News Alert” may just happen “this year!” But, for now, he is not talking. Nor, is she.

So, stay tuned.

*America’s Newsroom – 11/14/12 (@ 10:58 a.m. ET)

Relationship? Hemmer and MacCallum Mum

Steve Doocy: A lot of people think they are married. Yesterday, America’s Newsroom co-anchors Martha MacCallum and Bill Hemmer seemed somewhat disquieted when it came to the scuttlebutt about a possible off-camera relationship between the television couple.

On Fox News Radio’s Kilmeade & Friends, guest host Steve Doocy introduced Bill and Martha to his audience, remarking, “A lot of people think that they are married.”* When an uncomfortable silence ensued, Steve said, “I thought you were going to say something.” Succinctly, Martha responded, “We don’t want to talk about that.” Chuckling, Bill added, “Especially here.”

Apparently, many Kilmeade & Friends listeners were disappointed that both Martha and Bill opted not to discuss the status of any potential personal relationship. For the third day in a row, hits were at historic highs for seven-month-old Carpe Diem post, “Martha MacCallum: Mrs. or Ms.?: ‘Miss’ing Her Marital Band.” Rumors of Martha’s marital status have been fueled by December 9, 2011 profile (201) Magazine article, “Holiday Look: Martha MacCallum and her family get dressed up to celebrate” which seemed to feature Martha and her three children but not her husband; her subsequent doffing of her wedding ring for approximately a month and half on AN; and Bill’s jesting reference to Martha and himself in a photo of the two of them together on an Ailes-hosted evening harbor charity cruise as “the bride and groom.”

Bill and Martha: a happy couple? Unfortunately, yesterday, they failed to report. Until they do, the rumors will persist.

[Author's aside (caveat) - The quotes, supra, are to the best of the author's recollection: he recorded them approximately fifteen minutes after hearing them in an auto.]

*Kilmeade & Friends – 10/31/12 (@ 11:48 a.m. ET)

“Mrs.” Martha MacCallum: Ring of Truth?

Martha “punking” her fervent fans? Looking lovely as ever, FNC anchor Martha MacCallum hit the floor of the Democratic National Convention for Fox News on America’s Election Headquarters in a form-fitting blue dress last night. The blonde beauty commanded rapt attention as she deftly corresponded from the hall before President Obama’s coronation. However, she looked somewhat different than she had earlier in the day on America’s Newsroom other than the wardrobe change: Unless the author’s eyes deceived him (in a ring close-up shot),* Martha was donning a simple ring with a solitary stone on her ring finger instead of her usual one with white rocks across the crest.**

As Carpe Diem readers may remember, Martha was profiled in (201) Magazine December 2011 in an article entitled, “Holiday Look: Martha MacCallum and Her Family Get Dressed Up to Celebrate.” According to the story, Martha, “her husband, Daniel, and their three kids” resided in Ridgewood, New Jersey. In the accompanying photos, Martha (with a ring on her left ring finger) was seen with her family sans her husband Daniel.

Approximately four months later on AN (March 28), the author noticed and noted that Martha was “missing” her wedding band in his Carpe Diem article “Martha MacCallum: Mrs. or Ms.?” Soon thereafter, he further related that America’s Newsroom co-host Bill Hemmer joked on AN (April 26) that Bill and Martha were the “bride and groom” in a pic of them posing together on a fundraiser cruise. Less than a week later, the author reported that on May 2 Bill playfully posited, “So how do we [Bill and Martha] look?” after mentioning “speed dating.”

Adventitiously or not, a week and a day later, Martha was once again sporting seemingly “connubial bling.”  However, almost a month later, Martha did doff her marital band again as reported by the author in Carpe Diem‘s “The Third: Martha’s Independence Day?” Perhaps, not so incidentally, that very next day (the actual Independence Day), Martha had her connubial “shackle” on anew and she seemingly has not been able to escape it since.

But, last night, the appearance of Martha’s “new” ring seemed to suggest that her crested “wedding” ring may have been merely an AN prop that she simply forgot to take last night to AEH. If it were, she should not have feared to eschew any artifice and to lay bare–at least, her left ring finger–before her avid votaries. In fact, she surely would have stoked their ardor all the more with such a naked truth.

Martha: Mrs. or Ms.? An open question.

*Fox & Friends – 09/06/12 (@ 10:59 a.m. ET)

**America’s News Headquarters – 09/06/12 (@ 9:02 p.m.)

Bill Hemmer: RE’s “Notorious PAB”

Patti Ann Browne: “Yeah, you know me.”* But, many of America’s Newsroom viewers probably do not know her, i.e., that their demurely dressed guest co-anchor has deigned to moonlight with the demimonde as an FNC late night vixen. To wit, Red Eye host Greg Gutfeld aptly marveled, “She’s so sweet: And, yet, she’s so dirty! The duality of woman!”**

For those who might think that Patti Ann appears to have been plucked from their local PTA, they may well want to remember the Harper Valley version. Only, this prim and proper mommy by day got her groove on after midnight. As her Red Eye appearances show, she can be tough, bawdy, and, oh, so sexy!

Bravo, Bill, for reminding PAB devotees that their dame is “not that innocent.”

[Author's aside: The title is taken from the exchange between Bill and PAB as the second hour of AN began. Bill queried, "What did they call you, "Notorious PAB" on Red Eye? PAB answered, "They do! Yeah, you know me."]

*America’s Newsroom – 08/07/12 (@ 9:59 a.m. ET)

**Red Eye - 12/31/08 (Vid – 2:14/2:22)

Bill Hemmer: “So How Do We Look?”

Martha MacCallum: Please send in your Tweets and messages. Please vote.” A new Hemmer hint? Today, America’s Newsroom co-anchor Bill Hemmer seemed to fan the flames about any notion that he and his recently “ringless” co-host Martha MacCallum may be a hot new item indeed. And, Martha seemed to add gas to that very fire.

Less than a week ago (last Thursday), AN producers aired a pic of Bill and Martha posing together in a rather romantic setting  (i.e., against the backdrop of the New York skyline on an Ailes-hosted evening harbor charity cruise) from the night before: when they did so, Bill laughed, “Oh, my gosh! The bride and the groom!” Today, after a segment referencing putative GOP nominee Mitt Romney’s VP quest, Martha declared, “It’s like speed dating: traveling around the country spending a little time with each one of the contestants. Right?” In a seemingly incongruent response, Bill pointed to Martha, to himself, and then to Martha again, asking, “So, how do we look?”

As they both chuckled heartily, Martha remarked, “Please send in your Tweets and messages. Please vote.”

Please do.

*America’s Newsroom – 05/02/12 (@ 10:32 a.m. ET)

MacCallum & Hemmer: “Bride & Groom”?

America’s Newsroom’s beauty in black and her bad boy in tux. Single America’s Newsroom co-anchor Bill Hemmer and his recently “ringless” co-host Martha MacCallum a hot item? Intentionally or not, Bill may have stoked the rumor fires this morning when he mentioned his “big night” with Megyn last night and gave a “personal shout-out” to his FNC colleague Geraldo Rivera (who was the guest of honor at a NYC Open Gate fundraiser/cruise last night) and his wife Erica as AN concluded.* Subsequently, after producers had aired a photo of Geraldo and Erica together at the New York harbor dinner charity cruise (hosted by FNC head honcho Roger Ailes and his wife Beth for them and other FNC luminaries), they then showed an al fresco pic of Martha in her beautiful black dress and Bill in his black-tie tux posing together with the NY harbor in the background. When Bill saw the photo of the two of them beaming side-by-side, he chuckled and exclaimed, “Oh, my gosh! There’s the bride and groom!”

Perhaps, in an attempt to tamp down any resultant rumors, Martha immediately remarked, “I thought it was James Bond. It’s you, though, in a self-tied bow tie…. You took that great picture of Erica and Geraldo. And, I think you should, maybe, be available for weddings because that’s a beautiful shot of them.”

Martha, be careful for what you wish. Bill might just be available for a wedding. After all, he did once opine to his former AM co-host Megyn Kelly (as a guest on her America Live show in a pertinent discussion) that he did not see anything wrong with office romance if it did not interfere with the lovers’ work.

Bill, see what you have started!

*America’s Newsroom – 04/26/12 (@ 10:59 a.m. ET)

Anna Kooiman, “Welcome to the Fox Family!”

Bill Hemmer: “Nice.” New FNC correspondent hire Anna Kooiman made her apparent debut on America’s Newsroom in fine form today. Dressed in virginal white, the long-tressed blonde beauty reported on strict business news (a new NYC company plan to provide “fee-free ATM’s” to the Big Apple). When she concluded her report, AN co-anchor Martha MacCallum congenially declared, “Anna, thank you. And, welcome to New York, Anna. Good to have you with us!” After a grateful Anna answered, “Thank you. Thank you,” Martha’s equally appreciative, grinning cohost, Bill Hemmer added, “Yeah. Welcome to the Fox Family. Nice.”

Nice indeed. Yes, the former WCCB FOX Charlotte (NC) anchor displayed the on-camera smarts, skills, and allure to keep her viewers tuned in and turned on. However, cloaked in form-obscuring garb today, “Elevate Magazine’s Sexiest News Anchor Summer 2010” beauty offered few clues as to her acclaimed “FOX” quotient. But if her 2010 Team Beachbody six-pack-abs pic is any indication, the AFAA-certified fitness instructor definitely has it.

FNC’s latest fox? Certifiable. Congratulations, Anna!

America’s Newsroom – 01/06/12 (@ 9:24 a.m. ET)

Update: After Carpe Diem‘s account of Anna’s debut on American Newsroom, supra, she broke her almost two-week silence on Twitter. To her followers, she excitedly Tweeted, “My first full FNC story!!! Sick of paying bank fees? Here’s one place you may not have to anymore!… http://fb.me/Z3b9F3Qe.”

[Author's aside: Anna's link includes her AL vid and an accompanying written report.]

Red Eye Alert: Ombudsman Levy Off [Updated]

“New Year’s Eve special is Saturday at 12:30 a.m.” NOT! Ironically, on a day that “TV’s Andy Levy” left his usual role as Red Eye ombudsman to fill in for Greg Gutfeld as anchor, he did not catch a manifest mistake in his final segment.

As Levy returned to RE‘s final block this morning, he declared, “Hey, don’t forget our annual New Year’s Eve special airs this Saturday at 12:30 a.m. Eastern and Pacific Time right after Fox News Channel’s ‘All-American New Year’ with Bill Hemmer and Megyn Kelly ringing in 2012 live from Times Square.” Underneath him, compounding the error, an RE chyron blared, “Our New Year’s Eve Special Is Saturday at 12:30 AM ET/PT.” Not quite: if RE follows Bill and Megyn ushering in the New Year, RE will be on Sunday at 12:30 a.m. ET.

Red Eye fans, time to reset your DVR’s.

Update: Early this morning (12/29/11), chronologically-challenged “TV’s Andy Levy” repeated his mistake on RE. Before the “Post-Game Wrap-Up,” Levy said, “Remember, our New Year’s Eve special airs Saturday at 12:30 a.m. Eastern….[i]t’s right after Fox News Channel’s “All-American New Year” with Bill Hemmer and Megyn Kelly ringing in 2012 live from Times Square.” Perhaps, RE‘s addled ombudsman jester can be forgiven for his slackness: today, he Tweeted, “Ugh I’m still writing 2011 on all my checks. (Too soon?)”

Banderas: Half-Naked…Promiscuous Big Bird

Patti Ann Browne: We’d like to see photos, Julie! FNC correspondent Julie Banderas bawdily spiced up her America’s Newsroom Halloween report this morning. After her story on a study showing Americans spending approximately $7 billion this year and more adults using the holiday as an escape, she saucily commented, “Patti Ann…the survey did not cover why it is [that] this is the time of year women decide to go out half-naked.”*

As a smiling AM guest co-host PAB reddened and an animated AM co-anchor Bill Hemmer chortled in the background, Julie added, “I mean, you do realize…if you look at look at women’s costumes online–I was looking at Elmo’s costumes [for daughter Addison Melissa]–I’m dressing up as Big Bird. A promiscuous Big Bird costume is all I could find.”

“Really?” an instantly intrigued PAB asked. “I’m not kidding!” Julie answered. Chuckling, Patti Ann spicily replied, “I didn’t know there was such a thing. But, we’d like to see photos, Julie!” Nodding, a grinning Julie responded, “No, it’s scary. I will show you.”

As PAB beamed and Bill began to randily reply, “That’s the,”, a suddenly demure Julie put up her hands and unconvincingly insisted, “No, I’m covering up: I’m not going to be one of the promiscuous Big Birds.”

Chuckling, Bill responded, “Banderas, that’s the funniest thing you’ve ever said.” As a somewhat chagrined Julie giggled, Bill concluded, “Really! Well played. See you later.” Succinctly, a smiling Juliet concurred, “Yeah!”

Halloween on Sesame Street: Banderas–a better bird.

*America’s Newsroom – 10/31/11 (@ 10:37 a.m. ET)

Update: When a Twitter follower asked if Julie’s hubby Andrew Sansone would go as Mr. Snufolupogus since she had said that she was going as Big Bird and Addison as Elmo, Julie teased, “It’ll b [sic] a surprise. I’ll post pics later!”

Andrea Tantaros On: Heavy-Breathing Beckel Off

Martha MacCallum: “very Darth Vader.” The Five co-host and liberal playboy Bob Beckel seemed to have it bad for his sexy conservative co-anchor Andrea Tantaros this morning. When the two appeared together on America’s Newsroom in their weekly debate segment, the long-tressed Greek lovely opined on Michele Bachmann’s performance in the GOP Presidential debate: As she did so in a solo shot, Bob could be heard breathing belaboredly off-camera.*

When Andrea had finished, AN co-anchor Bill Hemmer chuckled, “I hear Bob breathing heavy [sic]. I don’t know if that’s because of the question or.” Before he could finish, a grinning Andrea giggled, “Probably ’cause of me!” Grinning, Bill continued, “The coming answer. Or is it Tantaros?” Slightly smiling, Bob stammered, “Juh, juh, it’s just being on, it’s just being on here on the show, Bill, [that] does it.”

As the segment ended, Bill kidded, “Well, you got seven hours [until FNC's The Five] to catch your breath, Bob. And, we’ll see you both at five o’clock. Alright?” Beaming broadly, a reddening Bob stuttered, “I, you, you, I’ll catch it as best I can.” After Bill had thanked his two guests, his co-anchor Martha MacCallum aptly added, “I mean–very Darth Vader.”

Bad boy Bob Beckel: The Five’s “dark side”?

*America’s Newsroom – 09/13/11 (@ 9:46 a.m. ET)

Apologetic Aly: “I’ll Be Back”

Camerota: “I do feel like I sorta vanished without a trace….I’m sorry for all the questions.” Today, Fox & Friends Weekend co-host Alisyn Camerota called in to her weekend show to reassure her concerned fans that she would indeed return to F&FW. At least, sometime in the future.

Before Aly’s telephonic appearance, F&FW producers ran a comedic collage of clips of her and her co-anchors Dave Briggs and Clayton Morris, at Shea Stadium on FOX fan night yesterday.* In the final snippet, America’s Newsroom co-host Bill Hemmer grabbed a reluctant Aly and led her away from her F&FW boys. As Dave and Clayton protested, Aly threw them a kiss and remarked, “I’ve got to go with Bill. I’m sorry. I’ll be back!”

As the humorous montage ended, Clayton dryly commented, “That’s the story of our lives, Bill Hemmer yanking Alisyn away. And, we…managed to get Alisyn on the phone this morning.” On cue, Aly animatedly exclaimed, “Hey, guys! What’s going on, my estranged TV husbands and their new wife [Molly Line]. Hey, Molly!” As Molly laughed, Clayton commented, “I know, my TV wife: we miss you.”

Shaking his head with a wry smile, Dave interjected, “You left us for Bill Hemmer. It was right there.”

Amused, Aly explained, “Well, it’s not permanent. As you know, I’m very fickle. And, I like the whole sort of square dance of different men. So, I’ll be back.”

Clayton responded, “Oh, good. Yeah, it was great to see you last night.” Then, echoing his excepted explanation of two weeks ago, he remarked, “We’re doing the maternity shuffle right now. Explain this maternity shuffle because you’re in the midst of it. Right?”

Elucidating somewhat, Aly answered, “Yeah, Megyn [Kelly of America Live] is out because she had a pretty baby girl; and Martha MacCallum [of America's Newsroom] is filling in her; and I’m filling in for Martha; and sometimes I’m filling in for Megyn; and Molly is so sweet to fill in for me.” Then, she rightly remarked, “I know it’s been a crazy couple of months.”

After some subsequent impertinent palaver, Clayton commented, “Finally, we’ve been able to answer all of that question [sic] because we get e-mails and Tweets all the time, ‘Where’s Aly?’ So, now everyone knows.”

Apologetically, Aly answered, “I know, and I feel so badly about that. I mean I do feel like I sorta vanished without a trace even though I am hiding in plain sight from 9 to 11 every morning on the East Coast. But, I do really miss you guys, and I really miss all of our loyal viewers.”

Conciliatorialy, Aly concluded, “And, so I’m sorry for all the questions. And, I’m just happy to see you guys last night, and…we’ll be reunited.”

But, when? During Megyn’s maternity leave, Martha has repeatedly gone home to America’s Newsroom while Aly has stayed away from Fox & Friends Weekend. Something afoot, Aly?

[Author's aside: In the intro to the final hour of the show, Molly remarked, "In for Alisyn. Get a chance to hang out with you guys until she returns: "The new girl" appears to intimate that she has secured the center seat on the F&FW curvy couch until Aly comes back--at least, on Saturdays. As for Sundays, it seems that Ainsley may have similarly locked in her sub role for Aly: During Aly's phone-in (7:34 a.m. ET), Dave declared, "We want to say that we really appreciate your, your fill-ins here: Molly and Ainsley have done a great job." N.B. No mention was made of Juliet Huddy or any other Aly sub.]

*Fox & Friends Weekend – 06/18/11 (7:32 a.m. ET)

Megyn: I Was the Victim of Bullying

Kelly’s catfight recalled? Today, after a segment on school bullying, American Morning anchor Megyn Kelly obliquely remarked, “I was the victim of such bullying [re viral Aussie-big-boy-victim vid] when I was in school.”* Then, as a school counselor might intone, she added, “And, one positive angle I can offer to young girls out there who are victims of it is [that] I do think it makes you a more empathetic person. And, you can take that with you throughout your life and use it  [in] situations like this.”

When Megyn revealed that rather ambagious aside on AL today about her being picked on as a young girl, the author recollected Megyn saucily telling Bill Hemmer (her then America’s Newsroom co-host) about such a high school tormentor. In her account then, Megyn disclosed that when she was a sophomore “in [her] cheerleading uniform,” she was confronted by a senior girl who called her “the ‘b’ word.” In response, Megyn had retorted, “If you call me that one more time, you’re gonna regret it.” When the senior bully did so, Megyn stated that she “let her have it” and that they both” were down on the ground rolling around…in the girl’s locker room” until the gym teacher stopped intervened.

However, Megyn’s bullying moral then was much more direct than it was today. To Bill and her AM audience, she crowed, “She never bothered me again–not that I’m advocating violence.”

*America Live – 03/22/11 (@ 1:50 p.m. ET)

Bill Hemmer: Kiran & T.J.’s Favorite Fox

John Roberts: Their forgotten “dog”? Yesterday, one month to the very day that American Morning co-host John Roberts bid adieu to his AM audience, John’s television wife Kiran Chetry and his substitute T.J. Holmes seemed to have conveniently forgotten all about him. In fact, AM’s quilom alpha male appeared altogether off the CNN radar.

During a Super Bowl segment almost mid-show, Kiran and T.J. interviewed famed New York sportscaster Len Berman about the upcoming game. When they had finished their interview, Berman jested, “You know what I think is really cool [is] that you guys are going to sit with the Fox people and watch the State of the Union address.”

Nodding her head in mock agreement, Kiran deadpanned, “Absolutely! Everyone’s invited.” Looking at Kiran and then to Berman, a smiling T.J. replied, “Yeah. Me and Bill Hemmer, we already worked it out.” Chuckling, Kiran continued, “Me and Bill-o, we’re just gonna be there watching the game.”

Not surprisingly, neither Kiran nor T.J. made mention of John Roberts, AM’s co-host as of a mere month ago, who defected to Fox News. Rather, they both chose to inject America’s Newsroom anchor Bill Hemmer, a 2005 AM alum (who like Roberts was canned during an AM revamping and left for FNC) into their collegial chatter. Perhaps, the wounds are still too raw for them to reach out to their latest “Benedict.”

MacCallum Mocks Napolitano

Martha: “367 Days in a Year” not “364 Days a Year.” Hoisting herself on her own petard, American Morning co-host Martha MacCallum poked fun at DHS Secretary Janet Napolitano today.

This morning, Martha reported that Secretary Napolitano told ABC’s Diane Sawyer in an interview that “we are…working 24/7 364 days a year to keep the American people safe.” Introducing the clip, Martha joked, “Homeland Chief Janet Napolitano may need a new calendar for the new year’s [sic].” Then, after playing the footage, Martha laughed, “[3]64, last time I checked there were 367 days in the year. Right, Bill?”

Not responding to Martha’s patent error, co-anchor Bill Hemmer jested, “We can actually vacation after that?”

Continuing to spoof the Secretary, Martha chuckled, “Which day are they not working is the question.” Then, suddenly, waxing a whit more charitable, Martha added, “I don’t know, you gotta cut her a little slack though in that regard. We’ve all misspoken at times. Right?”

Cutting Martha herself more than a little slack at that ironic moment, Bill ignored Martha’s mistake. Instead, he subtly corrected the Secretary, softly saying, “We’ll add one [day] next time.”

Update: Subsequently, some of Martha’s Twitter followers took her to task for saying that there were “367 days in a year.” In response, she Tweeted, “357 [sic] was a joke. Sarcasm was lost on some.” However, at least, one follower, @solucky was unimpressed: s/he responded, “@marthamaccallum Nice try, but you said 367 days and YOU misspoke and came up with the sarcasm excuse after the fact.”

*America’s Newsroom – 12/21/10 (@ 9:35 a.m. ET)

AN: Missing Martha’s Gams

Introducing a new America’s Newsroom set with a large table separating his audience from him and fellow co-host Martha MacCallum, Bill Hemmer Tweeted, “Notice anything different today @ America’s Newsroom?” Martha’s male admirers certainly did. Weighing in, Fox & Friends Weekend preeminent sloganeer Chas Edwards, perhaps, only half-jokingly, replied, “@billhemmer Not so sure I like the Desk thing. Harder to see Martha’s legs…lol.”

Other Martha acolytes were not as sanguine as they animatedly responded directly to the lovely herself. One, @guyterrifico wrote, “@marthamaccallum [Y]a my 1rst idea to improve show was to put amazing waist and legs behind a huge oversized desk. [I] must be a genius. :)” Another, @eduardo63 warned, “You want to go to last place? Just keep using the set you used today and it will happen.”

Fear not, fellows: You may get your morning gander at Megyn gorgeous gams again soon. Remember, AN began with leggy alum Megyn Kelly behind a desk: however, producers soon learned that her fans preferred a more personal approach and took the desk way. Later, the producers briefly tried to bring the desk back but again without success. If Martha’s devotees are similarly fortunate, this “new” tack, too, shall pass.

Update: To her fervid followers, Martha responded, “New set just till elections! They are working on our election night set.”

Hemmer: Huddy, “Kiss a Little More Butt”

America’s Newsroom‘s Bill Hemmer added his own special spice to the “barbie” this morning as he and co-host Juliet Huddy confected the Labor Day edition of America’s Newsroom. As the program began, the low-key Bill remarked, “We labor together on this Labor Day. I’m Bill Hemmer….How [are] you doing, Juliet?” Saccharinely unctuous, Juliet responded, “Juliet Huddy, in for Martha MacCallum. I’m good. Sunny and beautiful outside but it’s sunny and beautiful in here with you, too, Bill.” Smiling, Bill answered, “Good to be here with you.” Conspicuously facetious, she responded, “It’s good to be with you.” Looking down and grinning, Bill deftly riposted, “Kiss a little more butt!”

And, to think, that Bill was once a stodgier American Morning co-host on CNN: his transmogrification appears complete.

MacCallum: AN’s Makeshift Host?

Bill Hemmer: “We’ve been on the job hunt for a year!” A Freudian slip by the America’s Newsroom anchor who reportedly recently renewed his multi-million contract with Fox News? As his AN co-host Martha MacCallum took the week off, his former CNN colleague and recent FNC hire Arthel Neville filled in once again seamlessly for her today. Perhaps, a  tad too well for MacCallum’s comfort.

At the bottom of the nine o’clock hour (ET) on America’s Newsroom this morning, Neville announced that Ellen DeGeneres had quit as a judge on American Idol and that Jennifer Lopez was a potential candidate to replace her. When she had finished, a grinning Hemmer puckishly asked, “So there’s a job opening, right?”* As Neville chuckled in the background, Hemmer cryptically continued, “We’ve been on the job hunt for a year.” However, Hemmer failed to elaborate further.

“We’ve been on the job hunt for a year.” Really? For what position? As the author mulled Hemmer’s words over, he remembered that America’s Newsroom then co-host Megyn Kelly took off approximately year ago (September 2009). However, when her son Yates was born, Kelly did not return to AN: rather, she took the reins of her new show, i.e., America Live. And, MacCallum was ostensibly given Kelly’s baton at AN.

For now, the AN graphics read, “America’s Newsroom w/ Bill Hemmer & Martha MacCallum. But, for how long?

*America’s Newsroom – 07/30/10 (@9:34 a.m. ET)