“CNN’s Stephanie Elam” Returns to A.M.

Rob Marciano: I heard a familiar voice this morning…@Stephanie Elam nice work!” Friday, whilom CNN biz beauty Stephanie Elam returned anew as a CNN correspondent on early morning news programs Early Start and Starting Point much to the delight of her former CNN colleague and Entertainment Tonight co-host Rob Marciano and, assuredly, a myriad of her erstwhile American Morning fans.

For Early Start viewers, Stephanie came back as a friendly, familiar face invigorating the engaging new duo of  Zoraida Sambolin and John Berman: For the Starting Point audience who had not yet abandoned ship a la their star-crossed captain Soledad O’Brien, poor Stephanie was just another warm body trying to keep that sinking ship afloat until a New Day finally dawns.

Welcome back, Stephanie!

[Author's aside: "CNN's Stephanie Elam" refers to the repeated moniker given Stephanie by Zoraida and John when introducing Stephanie before her Camarillo, California, wildfire reports to their CNN early morning audience.]

Kiran Chetry: She’s Finally Back!

“Works at NBC.” Former American Morning co-host Kiran Chetry has finally seized her “very special opportunity” seemingly. After bidding her faithful fans a tearful namaskaar almost two years ago from AM‘s diva divan, Kiran updated her work status today on Facebook, demurely declaring, “Works at NBC News.”

Carpe Diem readers should not be too surprised. Over six months ago, when Kiran announced that she would be a featured keynote address speaker with NBC’s Willie Geist, the author queried, “Kiran’s ‘very special opportunity’ at hand?” More tellingly, perhaps, a month ago to the day, Kiran happily heralded her appearance on NBC news for her Rock Center segment on Tennessee school twins.

Welcome back, Kiran! It’s been far too long!

Soledad’s Fall: CNN’s Spring?

Zucker’s “Morning in America”: O’Brien toast–again. Starting Point anchor Soledad O’Brien has been iced again as the face of CNN’s dawn according to the New York Times. Throwing cold water on Soledad’s vain hopes to finally prevail in the cable news morning ratings wars, CNN’s new chief Jeff Zucker finally cried, “No mas.”

As long-time CNN viewers may know, Soledad and Miles O’Brien co-hosted American Morning from 2003 to 2007 and were replaced by Kiran Chetry and John Roberts to revitalize flagging ratings. Over four years later (July 15, 2011), Soledad ominously returned to the show to substitute for Kiran for her first absence after AM announced Kiran’s own imminent departure from the still ratings-challenged show. Subsequently, when the ill-fated AM folded at the end of the year, Soledad was given a second chance to redeem herself and the CNN brass in the new year with Starting Point in the 7-9 a.m. ET hours. Unfortunately, for Soledad, she failed to seize the opportunity and sunk the show to even lower depths.

Yesterday, the New York Times reported that Zucker was pulling the plug on Soledad and that she would leave Starting Point this spring. According to the old Gray Lady, Zucker had “decided even before he started the job in January that he wanted to replace…[her program]…with a brand new one.” As to Soledad’s future, it added that she would create a new production company and “continue to supply documentaries to CNN on a nonexclusive basis.”

Putting a positive spin on her departure to the Hollywood Reporter, Soledad said, “I will not miss getting up that early, I cannot lie, not for a minute.” Defending her show itself, she declared, “We had a staff  of people–we never were fully staffed–where we were able to in spite of not getting a lot of support really make our show relevant. To do that, that was pretty tremendous.”

Soledad’s fall: CNN’s spring. It will be morning in Zucker’s America again soon.

Kiran’s Christmas Wish: More F&FW Magic?

“I told [Santa] I just want a job. Lol!!” Shine Kiran’s future Santa? Within the span of only six days as Christmas drew imminently near, former FNC/CNN anchor Kiran Chetry clearly indicated that she is more than eager to return to the air. On December 16, she Tweeted a pic of herself, her kids, and St. Nick, saying, “Santa came to LYC! I told him I just want a job. Loll!!” A mere five days later, she Tweeted a fun food-face photo, declaring, “Making lunch for the kids. Moma need a job:).”

Apparently, Kiran does indeed need a job now (after her namaskaar to American Morning almost one year and half ago): And, her former employer FNC’s Programming SVP Bill Shine could certainly use her. Since Shine will lose his popular Fox & Friends Weekend co-anchor Dave Briggs in seven short days (at the end of this year), he needs someone who can seamlessly replace Dave on the curvy couch with co-hosts Alisyn Camerota and Clayton Morris. And, Kiran, certainly could: After all, she teamed with Aly (during her first F&FW stint) as the smart, sassy, and sexy duo that made men literally weak in the knees and made F&FW must-see TV during the early-to-mid 2000′s in the process. (Remember Kiran spanking Kelly Wright?)

Hopefully, 2013 will be a time for new beginnings–for FNC and Kiran. A time for Roger Ailes to forgive Kiran after her sojourn in the desert. And, a time for Bill Shine to give Kiran that “very special opportunity“ to team up with Aly again (and Clayton) to make more F&FW magic.

Kiran: Chetrylicious Still?

K.C.: “Thanks for the honorable mention. i think.” Former FNC and CNN anchor Kiran Chetry may have exited cable news but she is far from forgotten. In “Sports Bank’s 1st Annual Hottest Female News Anchors” Top Ten list, the Nepalese beauty still earned an honorable mention even though she left “the building” almost a year and half ago. In fact, the “judge” indicated that otherwise she “would have easily made…[the]…Top 5.“

Accepting her “hotness” award with good humor, Kiran Tweeted, “Thanks for the honorable mention. i think. lol.” Raising hopes anew for her fervid votaries, Kiran continued, “I’ll be back soon. one year wiser, one year older.”

However, taking issue with Kiran’s list placement, hubby Chris Knowles aptly remarked, “@Kiranchetrytv honorable mention? Clearly blind men took part in this survey.” Following Chris’ cue, one Kiran Twitter follower payed his own homage, succinctly saying, “Namaste rani….” Meanwhile, another acolyte chimed, “You should be #1 on that list. You r the most beautiful and professional reporter I have come across.”

As long-time readers may recall, Carpe Diem coined the term “Chetrylicious” for Kiran over four years ago. Subsequently, American Morning EP Jamie Kraft seemed to embrace the moniker: E.g., during one AM, when the author suggested that he show Kiran dancing on camera, he did so forthwith to the tune of “Fergalicious.” Perhaps, taking that thought to heart a mite too much (about seven months later), “Richard Simmons literally salivated” over Kiran (and her feet) on that very memorable American Morning.

Chetrylicious still? If Kiran’s recent Twit pics are any indication (1,2), she certainly still definitely deserves that description. Nevertheless, Kiran’s fans may need much more proof–or, at least, assuredly want it!

CNN’s Rob Marciano Moves On, Too (to ET)

“[S]ad…but very pumped.” Today, CNN meteorologist Rob Marciano announced that he is leaving Ted Turner’s erstwhile crown jewel for greener pastures. In a Facebook post this afternoon, he said, “Definitely sad to be leaving my CNN family in January, but very pumped for the new gig co-hosting Entertainment Tonight with @NancyOdell. Wow!”

The former ivory Adonis of American Morning follows his fellow colleagues, ebony twin T. J. Holmes (BET), “voice of god” John Roberts (FNC), and AM Aphrodite Kiran Chetry (TBA) into the CNN sunset. For whilom AM fans, who still appreciate a fresh, irreverent perspective, Rob seems to be the last one waving the proverbial flag on the new CNN morning shows, Early Start and Starting Point. And, now he, too, is heading for the exit.

A sad day for Rob. And, his CNN fans. Not to mention, poor Zoraida Sambolin who is losing her “Senor Dreamy.”

Kiran Chetry Confesses: “Two New Obsessions”

“I’ve been on the beach…not…actually ‘working.’” Former CNN and FNC anchor Kiran Chetry is back and she has a confession to make: she has two, no, three new obsessions. After promising her fervent fans to be back “soon!!!!!” less than three weeks ago, she delivered, at least, a foretaste as a Huffington Post contributor today. In an article entitled “Observations from My Armchair,” Kiran revealed that she has indeed seized her personal “very special opportunity” after her emotional namaskaar to her American Morning audience over a year ago.

In a missive to her Twitter followers, Kiran Tweeted, “Check out my post from Huff Po…. Observations From My Armchair.” In the article, she declared, “I’ve been on the beach. Not sunning myself, but in TV terms, I have not been actually ‘working.’” Elaborating, the Nepalese beauty continued, “I left CNN last summer and quickly discovered two new obsessions: Tennis, and Bikram (hot) yoga.”  [Kiran's doubles champ pic and yoga goddess photo.] Then, in an sweet sop to her votaries who have eagerly anticipated her return to early morning news, she explained, “Oh, three obsessions actually. After 12 years doing some form of morning or night shift, I have become obsessed with eight hours of sleep. Something I haven’t seen since before Y2K shut down our world (errr).

Subsequently, in her HuffPo post, Kiran opines about her aptly cynical perspective on Presidential politics. In the process, she discloses that she is an independent voter and bemoans the fact that the Presidential candidates can not now actually be honest and tell the truth a la Ron Paul in the election process. Paraphrasing Jack Nicholson in a Few Good Men, she wonders, “As a nation could we really handle the truth?”

The nation? Perhaps, not. But, Kiran, your fans surely can–at least, for the moment. But, they still want their “Ray of Light” to brighten their dawn anew.

[Author's aside: Surprised by Kiran's truth? Cf. "Kiran Chetry: A Year Later".]

Kiran Chetry: Way Too Early?

“With (M)NBC’s Willie Geist, a good buddy of mine.” Former CNN and FNC anchor Kiran Chetry announced today that she will give the keynote address on Pace University’s Financial Education Day (Pleasantville, NY) on November 17, 2012. On her Facebook page that asks her friends to “stay tuned for Kiran Chetry’s next move,” she also reveals that she will share the duty with NBC’s Willie Geist. And, perchance, in a Freudian slip, she nonchalantly calls Geist ” a good buddy of mine” in the video to which she links.

Kiran’s “very special opportunity” at hand? As long-time Kiran acolytes know, their Nepalese goddess had a stellar, approximately seven-year run on Fox News (2001-2007) as a reporter and an a.m. anchor on both Fox & Friends Weekend and F&F First. When her contract renewal talks with FNC in 2007 soured, she was summarily selected to be the femme face of  CNN’s American Morning. After more than four years of awakening her AM fans with her inimitable “ray of light,” she bid them an emotional “namaskaar” on July 29, 2011, with the promise to see them again soon. In 2012, Kiran finally reappeared on TV–but as a special E! correspondent in January and February: subsequently, she did return to news, albeit Internet news, as a guest-anchor on GVTV (April 20).

Perhaps, as the year draws to a close, Kiran is once again ready to arouse her fans in the early morn on yet another cable news network, MSNBC. N.B. Kiran’s “very good buddy” Pace keynote speaker Willie Geist will soon leave his MSNBC’s Way Too Early with Willie Geist post for greener pastures as co-host of the Today Show (third hour).

Kiran’s “very special opportunity”: Way Too Early with Kiran Chetry?

H/t, J$P.

Kiran: “Not the Whole Story by Any Means”

Inquisitr snark : It appears Kiran Chetry is still waiting for that “special opportunity.” Foxy former CNN American Morning co-anchor Kiran Chetry seemed more than a mite miffed yesterday at little known Inquisitr.com author Nathan Francis who penned a strangely-timed, snippy piece entitled, “Kiran Chetry Still Waiting for Her Big Return to Television.” In a Tweet to her Twitter followers, Kiran linked to Francis’ story that claimed that she had not left CNN on “exactly amicable” terms and that derided her subsequent work, declaring, “Not the whole story by any means.”

Indeed. In Francis’ article almost two months after the one year anniversary of Kiran’s tearful namaskaar to CNN for a “very special opportunity,” Francis alleged that she had left on not “exactly amicable terms,” inanely citing her infamous on-air “scolding” by her then co-host John Roberts. Perhaps, the new writer at Inquitr forgot–if he ever knew–that it was Roberts who left AM shortly thereafter, and Kiran stayed on to be an anchor of CNN EVP Ken Jautz’s “right ‘American family.’”

Furthermore, Francis took his bizarre broadsides to Kiran and her work after CNN on E! News as a special correspondent and a GBTV guest anchor. Re Kiran in her red carpet reportage of the New York City premier of Smash, he sniped, ” [A] former Fox News reporter [who] found her way back onto television in January.”As to her engaging GBTV gig, he caviled, “[B]arely warrant[ing] a mention on Media Bistro…leaving fans who wanted to see her return to television disappointed.” Caustically, he concluded, “It appears Kiran Chetry is still waiting for that ‘special opportunity.’”

Actually, as the author noted over two months ago in Carpe Diem‘s “Kiran: A Year Later,” Kiran has seized her “very special opportunity” on a profoundly personal level. And, it is her faithful fans who are “still waiting for that ‘special opportunity’” for her professionally. As to Francis’ froth, as Oscar Wilde once said, “The only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about.”

Kiran Chetry: A Year Later

Kiran’s “very special opportunity” realized? Yesterday marked the first anniversary of Kiran Chetry‘s departure from CNN’s American Morning and from cable news in general. In her emotional namaskaar to her AM fans on July 29, 2011, she tearfully declared, “I’m terrible at goodbyes. I’m not going to say goodbye. I’m going to say, ‘See you soon.’” Approximately six months later (January 26), Kiran finally did return to television as a special E! correspondent: In that capacity, she facilely covered the NY premier of NBC series Smash then and about two weeks later deftly interviewed country music singer Dierks Bentley in an exclusive.* To the author’s knowledge, Kiran has not been back on television since then.

However, Kiran has reemerged for brief stints in other media forms. She guest-anchored GBTV’s Internet show “Real News from the Blaze” on April 20; guest-hosted news talk radio WABC’s “John Batchelor Show” on May 12; and penned a personal piece for Recessionista.com on June 8.

Even though her media appearances have been far too scant for her fans’ taste, Kiran has maintained her presence on Twitter with personal Tweets and photos. E.g., she has shared her experiences as a judge for Miss Nepal USA 2011; a Yoga goddess; a tennis champ; a celeb hobnobber; and, most importantly, the mommy of Maya (6) and Chris (4). In so doing, she has shown that she has seized a “very special opportunity” for herself this past year.

Nevertheless, Kiran’s acolytes are eagerly awaiting another “very special opportunity” for her professionally. Kiran certainly has the “it factor” when it comes to beauty, brains, and charisma on the news screen. Hopefully, she will get that chance very soon.

[Author's aside: For those CD readers who have inquired about her marital status, Kiran and her hubby Chris Knowles may possibly be in transition: Their connubial bands do seem to have disappeared lately in their photos and they reportedly have moved from their Westchester residence. Regardless, best wishes to both of them!]

*E! News (Dierks exclusive) – 02/08/12 (@ 7:35 p.m. ET)

Ali: “Miss You” Still, Kiran

Velshi (August 2011): “Miss @KiranChetryTV every morning.”  Today, CNN anchor Ali Velshi almost echoed those very words that he had shared with his former American Morning co-anchor Kiran Chetry‘s hubby Chris Knowles after Kiran left the show almost a year ago. And, in his sweet missive to Kiran, he said what many CNN morning viewers assuredly have been thinking lately, i.e., “Miss you.”

Earlier, Aly had received a Tweet from a former AM viewer yesterday, fondly reminiscing, “Those were the days I used to watch @cnn in the morning cc/ @AliVelshi @kiranchetrytv pic.twitter.com/6wkzOPSx. Somewhat awkwardly, Ali answered, “Ahh, memories of my old friend!” Not surprisingly, a “piqued” Kiran playfully interjected, “@AliVelshi hey who are you calling old mr??” Aptly apologetic, Ali responded, “Long time! I meant my ‘long time’ friend!’ Miss you.”

Indeed. If the paltry ratings of Early Start and Starting Point are any indication, so do many more of Kiran’s American Morning fans. Without doubt, TV cable news needs its “ray of light” again.

Kiran Chetry: “I’ll Never Forget My 1st Time!”

“I banged it out. Here was my masterpiece.” Yesterday, former FNC and CNN anchor Kiran Chetry reminisced about losing her virginity-sorry, guys and gals–her news virginity. Teasing her article on her friend Nicole Lapin‘s site, Kiran saucily Tweeted, “I’ll never forget my 1st time! [C]heck out my post on recessionista.com brainchild of my great buddy….”

In her piece, Kiran recalled her first news “hit” as an intern at “News 21,” her local cable news channel in Rockville, Maryland. In an era “before the Internet, BBS, iPhone, [and] GPS,” Kiran recounted the challenge of covering the local school board budget fight: doing her interviews, cutting her “stand-up,” and then “racing back to the station” to write her story with a twenty-minute deadline.

In so doing, Kiran remembered thinking to herself, “Do or die time Chetry!” Kiran proudly proclaimed, “I didn’t die. I banged it out. Here was my masterpiece.” Then, self-deprecatingly, she added that  the “local news cliches,” the “generic introduction to a soundbite,” and “nervous standup with awkward gesturing and holding the mic like an ice cream cone” were all there.

Kiran’s “1st time”: she won’t forget it. Nor will her fans. Stay tuned for the video!

CNN A.M. Future: Miles O’Brien? [Updated Anew]

Zoraida: Miles…in these parts, you are a rock star! Yesterday, Early Start co-host Zoraida Sambolin greeted former American Morning anchor Miles O’Brien to the CNN a.m. like a returning hero. During a space segment with the whilom point man for NASA coverage, Zoraida reintroduced the once canned anchor of the low-rated American Morning to CNN’s early morning shrinking audience. Before his report (on the return to earth of the NASA-sponsored Space X Dragon), Zoraida gushed, “Miles, I got to tell you, in these parts, you are a rock star! Everybody absolutely loves you! Very excited to talk to you this morning.”*

The moment seemed surreal: Miles O’Brien, a “rock star”? Almost five years ago, he and his American Morning co-host Soledad O’Brien unceremoniously got the Klein boot because of low-ratings (in favor of John Roberts and Kiran Chetry). When John and Kiran could not right the AM ship nor their interim successors Christine Romans, Carol Costello, and Ali Velshi, CNN replaced AM with their even more ratings-challenged shows Early Start (with anchors Ashleigh Banfield and Zoraida) and Starting Point (solo host Soledad): With ES and SP listing even lower than AM ever had, perhaps, Miles O’Brien “in these parts, is a rock star” and everybody does love him again.

So much so, that CNN brings Miles back to its early mornings?

*Early Start – 05/31/12 (@ 6:04 a.m. ET)

Update 1: Turner Broadcasting CEO Phil Kent may have much more drastic measures planned for CNN’s a.m. than possibly adding Miles to the cast. After defending his prime-time line-up on the very day of Miles ES appearance, Kent admitted that “we have some other shows that probably need to be replaced.” If recent ratings are any indication, Early Start and Starting Point may well be among those very CNN shows.]

Update 2: According to the New York Daily News, veteran ABC reporter John Berman has now enlisted with CNN and will become an Early Start anchor. If Berman were to join the gals Ashleigh and Zoraida, he would add some much needed male perspective: But, if he teamed up with Miles instead (and the ladies exited), ES would become an all-boy’s club, perhaps, no more attractive than the current all-gal gala. Perhaps, on the bright side, Berman may simply serve as the last captain of CNN’s wee-hour Titanic and Kent will finally get a seaworthy ship.]

Kiran: A Face for Radio?

Not exactly! Nepalese lovely Kiran Chetry “appeared” anew on Mother’s Day Eve: unfortunately, for her acolytes, she decided to”reveal” herself this time–not on the boob tube again but on the radio, on the John Batchelor Show (WABC). Not that her dulcet sounds, wit, and wisdom on audio were unappreciated but they did made her fans long for the premium package, including, obviously, any concomitant video of Kiran in the flesh. Perhaps, to make amends, Kiran did Tweet a lovely photo of herself on the set with Batchelor.

Regardless, the latest avatar of Kiran caused the author to wonder when is this beauty really going to return to her natural home, cable news morning television. Regrettably, she (or her William Morris “super-agent John Ferriter”) may have burned the bridge to the place that most complemented her smart, sassy, and sexy style, i.e., Fox & Friends, where her erstwhile rival Gretchen Carlson strangely rules the early morning roost. Nevertheless, hopefully, CNN chief Ken Jautz will return Kiran to her CNN “A.M.” throne when he decides to pull the plug on his disastrous new morning programs, Early Start and Starting Point.

Kiran: “Ray of light.” Just what CNN needs to rouse it viewers again in the early morn. But, Ken, let her fully shine this time!

Rob Marciano: I’ve Got Butt Implants

“Can, can you tell?” On Hump Day, the boys were back in town in the CNN “A.M.” Yesterday, Early Start guest co-host Ali Velshi and meteorologist Rob Marciano brought in some much needed testosterone, albeit a low dose, to the usually “all girl” show. With co-anchor Ashleigh Banfield gone for the week, Ali sat in her place, perhaps, to test run a change in the dynamic of CNN’s moribund morning program.

In the second hour of Early Start Wednesday, news reader Christine Romans reported the story of a young man who had implanted magnets into his wrist to secure his iPod.* Segueing to Ali, Christine suggestively remarked, “Ali, what do you have implanted and where?” As ES co-host Zoraida Sambolin interjected, “Oh, my!,” Ali nonchalantly revealed, “I have a chip: I have one of those things like you put in a dog….I did it for a story. I’m a real company man.”

After an incredulous Zoraida felt the random canine chip in his right forearm, Ali segued to Rob, remarking, “Rob, no need to comment on my bodily [sic], you know, implants.” As Zoraida chuckled, Rob teased, “The company allowed you to do that story so that they can track you kinda like a dog that gets away.” Subsequently, he jauntily joked, “I’ve got butt implants”: Turning to offer the camera and his viewers a profile perspective, he laughed, “Can, can you tell?”

Happily not, Rob. But Early Start does need some “boy” implants. Or, at least, a few more testosterone shots.

*Early Start – 05/16/12 (@ 6:13 a.m. ET)

CNN’s Early Start: American Morning Again?

Alina Cho MT: WEIWEI”@AliVelshi…good AM.” Freudian slip? As Early Start began this morning guest co-host, a “wired” Ali Velshi, Tweeted, “Nice to be back w/ my buddy, colleague & former office mate @AlinaChoCNN. Between her @ZoraidaCNN & @ChristineRomans, it’s a good morning.” In reply, Alina exclaimed, “WEIWEI” and MT’d Ali’s Tweet with the not so subtle change of “good morning” to “good AM.” Whether she was answering enthusiastically in French phonetically, or, less plausibly, simply could not contain herself, literally, her message was crystal clear: Alina was quite excited to be back again with her former American Morning colleagues, AM co-hosts Ali and Christine Romans.

As well, Alina–not to mention, CNN suits–should have been. Early Start was a marked improvement over its short and dismal past: E.g., Co-host Zoraida Sambolin simply came alive today and asserted herself charismatically with uncharacteristic aplomb. Perhaps, it was simply because the rather reserved Zoraida was no longer tethered to her regular co-host Ashleigh Banfield, who, according to Inside Cable News, lacks the requisite chemistry with Zoraida as a ”hyper and over-caffeinated [anchor who leaves] no pause unmolested” in contradistinction to the more reserved Zoraida. Furthermore, it was a delight to see the facile, informed exchanges between Ali and Christine in clear contrast to the usual sycophancy of Ashleigh toward her “Mayor of the Morning” Christine.

Yes, American Morning under Ali and Christine and their erstwhile interim co-anchor Carol Costello was assuredly a morning CNN cellar dweller: But, at least, it was watchable (even eminently so, at least, until AM’s last permanent co-host, comely Kiran Chetry, bid her fans a final namaskaar). And, that is more than one can readily say about Early Start as it fatefully charters new ratings depths (even lower than AM ever descended in its ten-year history).

“Early Start”: American Morning again? CNN viewers can only hope.

Shep: Can’t Show Trampoline Bear Vid Anymore

Carpe Diem: Fox News FINALLY does the right thing. Today, FNC anchor Shepard Smith announced that he could no longer run the 2003 Trampoline Bear video on Studio B. After almost two years of Carpe Diem decrying that loathsome footage of a black bear falling from a tree onto a trampoline, being propelled high into the air, falling face first into unforgiving ground, and crumpling underneath its own weight, Fox News appears to have got the message at last–perhaps, after the author’s article, “Roman’s ‘No Ring Circus”, (just four days ago) on Shep’s seemingly sadistic snippet being embraced anew by Early Point guest anchor Christine Romans.

Today, after airing one of his famous bear updates (about an Altadema, California, momma bear and her two cubs in a tree), Shep remarked, “Aw, look at ‘em. You know what they need! They need those bears a trampoline.”* When someone seemed to chuckle softly off-camera, Shep added, “Get ‘em right out of there and put them on a trampoline. They have a nice little ride.” As long-time viewers, doubtlessly, awaited the Trampoline Bear video to run as usual, Shep sadly intoned, “Can’t show that anymore, though! Apologies.”

No apology need, Shep–at least, for not being able to show the odious Trampoline Bear video anymore. Rather, you should apologize for airing that horrid clip–repeatedly over the years.

Kudos, Fox News, for making Shep shape up. Finally.

*Studio B with Shepard Smith – 05/03/12 (@ 3:49 a.m. ET)

Related Carpe Diem stories (Trampoline Bear chronicles): “Shep’s Trampoline Bear: PETA MIA” (06/07/10); “Banderas’ ‘Teachable Moment’?” (07/25/10); “Banderas Responds: Bars Bear Vid” (07/27/10); “Banderas Recants Apology” (07/27/10); “Shep de Sade?” (07/28/10); “Banderas: ‘Not My Fault’” (08/03/10); “Shep de Sade’s Bad Boys” (08/06/10); “Shep de Sade: Kubrick’s Clare Quilty?” (08/12/10); “Shep Defends Trampoline Bear Video” (08/13/10); “The Good Shepard?” (08/20/12); “The Good Shepard Hydes” (08/26/10); “Shep’s Trampoline Bear: Old Miss Mascot?” (10/15/10); “As a Dog Returns to its Vomit” (10/16/10); “Hope Springs Eternal” (10/29/10); “Ole Miss’ Colonel Shep” (11/07/10); “Shep the Schlep” (02/21/11); “AM Adopts F&F’s Couch (But, Shep’s Commode?)” (05/17/11); and “Romans’ ‘No Ring’ Circus” (04/29/12).

Romans’ “No Ring” Circus

Trampoline Bear abused anew? Friday Early Start guest co-host Christine Romans reached back into her ignoble American Morning past when she once again reveled in the seeming sadism of Shepard Smith’s “Trampoline Bear” video. As she concluded ES with one final headline news story, Christine cheerfully noted, “Check out this awesome photo taken after police hit a bear in a tree with a tranquilizer dart….Campus police say he landed safely…on some mats [that] they pulled from the rec center.” After showing a pic of the bear suspended in midair above a mattress, Christine gleefully exclaimed, “Reminds us of this classic from Missoula, Montana, back in 2003: It’s the bear [that] fell out of the tree after getting another tranquilizer dart..”

Taking their cue, ES producers ran a snippet of the infamous video of the Trampoline Bear, a Missoula black bear falling onto a trampoline under a tree, being propelled high into the air, barreling headfirst into the unyielding ground, and then crumpling under its own weight. In response, Ashleigh chortled and then “sympathetically” said, “Oooh!” As producers ran the odious footage again in a loop, Christine quickly asserted, “Now come on! That looks like a hard fall! We promise he was fine, he was fine!”

Unconvinced, her ES co-anchor Ashleigh Banfield declared, “It does look like a hard fall. It does look like a hard fall!” Icily, Christine cooed, “They are so relaxed! They are so relaxed.” Ashleigh jested, “Wouldn’t you be with a tranquilizer dart? Uh, yie, yie!”

Belying her earlier assurances with a certain Schadenfreude, Christine deadpanned, “Oh, the headache later, you wouldn’t believe it!”

No worries, Early Start viewers, Trampoline Bear “was fine: He was fine!” At least, so promises CNN’s Christine Romans. Again.

[Author's aside: The "'no ring' circus" reference in the title was a playful allusion to married ES co-hosts Christine and Ashleigh's noticeably bare ring fingers Friday.]

“Don’t Sleep with T. J. Holmes”: BET or Marilee?

BET’s T. J. Holmes is not returning to CNN as he puckishly indicated Wednesday on Twitter: Rather, the former American Morning Adonis is staying with BET and he will finally have his new show. Yesterday, BET announced the advent of T.J.’s provocatively-dubbed program, Don’t Sleep with T. J. Holmes, to its advertisers at a Los Angeles preview for its advertisers yesterday according to Richard Prince’s Journal-isms. In a show promo, BET described Don’t Sleep as a comedic/political program (akin to Comedy Central’s Daily Show with Jon Stewart) and promised viewers that it “is not your mama’s late-night talk show.”

Congratulations, T. J.!

[Author's aside: Re the mention of "Marilee" in the title of this article, Marilee nee Fieburg is the name of T. J.'s beautiful beloved "Mrs. Holmes."]

T. J. Holmes: We’re Negotiating My [CNN] Return

It’s American Morning at CNN again? This morning, former CNN anchor T. J. Holmes indicated that he is leaving BET after a very brief “stint” there and going back to his home at the self-proclaimed “most trusted name in news” network. He Tweeted, “On a flight w/my old CNN boss. We’re negotiating my return.” Later, he wrote, “I expect to announce to you all this week some news about my future.”

Less than four months after bidding his CNN Newsroom weekend viewers adieu (to be a BET “multi-platform” jounalist), is T. J. back to save day for CNN–or, at least, the dawn? CNN honcho Ken Jautz must now be ruing his ill-considered decision to ditch his cellar-dweller morning show American Morning. As the ratings of his 2012 AM replacement shows, Early Start and Starting Point, have tanked (lowest in over a decade), Jautz may be thinking that he probably should have given his original plan more time, i.e., to possibly permanently pair T. J. with former AM anchor Kiran Chetry.

Whether it is “Morning in America,” may depend on one’s political point of view. But the return of the erstwhile trial T. J. and Kiran team would certainly help make it a brighter “American Morning” at CNN. And, AM  fans, T. J.’s return would certainly constitute Kiran’s long-awaited “very special opportunity.”

Update: Apparently, BET’s T. J. Holmes was pulling a practical joke on his CNN fans and Twitter followers. Cf. CarpeDiem’s “BET’s T. J. Holmes: Just a Joke?”