Game Day Over: Aly’s “B Team” Back!

No news is good news for Fox & Friends Weekend co-hosts Clayton Morris and Tucker Carlson. Yesterday, FNC’s “A Team” took the field after the capture of the last of the Boston Marathon bomber brothers: From an early edition F&F First to America Live, FNC’s regular programming (save for Happening Now) and their co-hosts returned to the day’s fare. Nevertheless, F&FW co-host Alisyn Camerota maintained her pivotal position on F&F‘s curvy couch as she was joined by FNC’s week-day alpha dogs, Brian Kilmeade (F&F co-anchor) and Jon Scott (Happening Now co-host). Notably, F&FW “B Team” boys, Clayton and Tucker were sent to the sidelines without a mere mention to their F&FW fans.

But, today was a new day. As the news returned to normal, Aly still reigned supreme on her curvy couch. And, joining her again were her courtiers, Clayton and Tucker, comfortably ensconced as her bookends: The alpha males had gone away and the beta boys were back in town.

Today, all was right again–at least, in F&FW‘s world.

Terse Gretch Explains Absence

“I’m glad to be back here today.” Fox & Friends co-anchor Gretchen Carlson seemed rather defensive this morning about her absence yesterday from F&F‘s Boston Marathon tragedy special edition. Appearing eager to explain America Live‘s Megyn Kelly‘s appearance on the curvy couch in her place, Gretchen got straight to the point as soon as the show started.

After the obligatory opening teases for the program, Gretchen solemnly said, “Welcome, everyone. Good to be back.” As her co-hosts Brian Kilmeade and Steve Doocy looked at her with stone faces, a seemingly agitated Gretchen declared, “Unfortunately, I was on an airplane when all of this happened in Boston and could not get from the West Coast. I’m glad to be back here today.” In response, Steve stayed strangely silent and Brian simply said, “Yeah.”

Yeah. Sounds like someone may have heard the scuttlebutt. Or, read Carpe Diem yesterday.

Kelly “Confesses”: I Cohabitated, Lived in Sin

“Before my first marriage and it ended in divorce.” America Live anchor Megyn Kelly revealed to her fans Thursday that she lived with her first hubby Dr. Dan Kendall before they tied the knot but she stressed that she had changed her ways when she later met her second and current husband Doug Brunt.

In a segment subtitled “The New Normal: Study Finds Cohabitation Is on the Rise,” Megyn introduced the story, disclosing, “I cast no judgment by calling it ‘living in sin’ because I have done it.”* After an entertaining discussion with her panel (Kirsten Powers and Monica Crowley) about the merits of not “giving the milk away for free,” Megyn further revealed, “I will say this for the record: I, I cohabitated, lived in sin, before my first marriage and it ended in divorce.”

Summing up her own life’s lesson for the AL audience, Megyn continued, “And, then I married Doug, and we did not live together at, at all until we got married. And, we’re very happily married with two kids and one more on the way.” For any who might be offended with her conclusion, she laughed, “So, you know, for what it’s worth!”

*America Live – 04/04/13 (@ 1:36 p.m. ET)

Megyn & Janice: Brunt Snuggle Bunnies?

FOXes and friends: “You should have seen the two of us this morning with our coffee in our little queen-sized bed.” Fox News gal pals, America Live anchor Megyn Kelly and FNC meteorologist Janice Dean, saucily shared a few details of their earlier night together with their AL audience yesterday. But, don’t try to read too much into it unless Megyn’s hubby, New York Times best-selling author Douglas Brunt (“Ghosts of Manhattan”), includes more about his “GQ Intelligence…Hot” wife and fun, frisky Janice “I Was at a Strip Club” Dean in his second novel.

When Janice concluded her weather report yesterday about Hurricane Sandy’s lingering effect (at the bottom of the first hour), Megyn remarked, “Well, there’s…some silver linings to a big storm like this….This kind of thing [does] have a way of bringing people together–including the two people you see on your screen right now.”*

As a chuckling Janice reddened, Megyn mischievously recounted, “Janice and I doubled up in a hotel room last night ’cause they were scarce and few and far between here in New York.” Giggling, she racily continued, “And, we had a little, you know, sleepover, a girl’s sleepover: The first time in twenty years I had…a sleepover.”

Before responding, Janice lauded their respective hubbies for tending the children in their absence: then, she sweetly answered, “I love you, Megyn! You’re the best roommate a girl could ever have.”

Laughing, Megyn replied, “J. D., right back at ya!” As Janice blew her a kiss, Megyn teased, “You should’ve seen the two of us this morning with our coffee in our little queen-sized bed!” Spicing up their tale, Janice exclaimed, “Oh! Snuggling!”

Grinning, Megyn concluded, “Alright, see ya, Hon!”

Another Brunt bestseller in the making?

*America Live – 10/31/12 (@ 10:28 a.m. ET)

F&F’s “Sexy” Nauert: Distant But in Control

Waking up with Heather on the weekend. Leggy Fox & Friends First co-host Heather Nauert seized the F&F Weekend helm for Alisyn Camerota with gusto Sunday. But, instead of flaunting her gorgeous gams a la F&FF, the blond beauty seemed somewhat demure: Dressed in a short black dress and an “M&M” green jacket, Heather hid herself behind her open laptop for the day (as her co-hosts Clayton Morris and Dave Briggs provided her cover as they anomalously kept theirs studiously open as well).

Sexy or not, the girl still ruled the roost almost like a young E.D. Hill. Playing the needed F&FW “alpha bitch,” Heather had her boys going through their paces. Rarely stopping for breath, she was subtly hushing Dave with her hand at one moment and conspicuously instructing Clayton to elaborate at another.

Heather may have performed well today as a substitute with her co-hosts, Clayton and Dave: But, she could learn from Aly, the master, on how to awaken F&FW‘s fans. For FNC weekend viewers who are struggling mightily to escape the embrace of Morpheus, a softer, gentler greeting from a gorgeous gal is preferable to one from a Red-Bull-infused chatty Cathy. To boot, she may want to close the cloaking laptop as a general rule in the future: as Megyn Kelly aptly declared (about her America Live leg-displaying glass desk), “It’s a visual business. People want to see the anchor.”

“Ghosts” of Megyn Kelly: Doug Brunt Blunt?

“That’s all I’ll admit to.” America Live anchor Megyn Kelly welcomed “a very special guest,” hubby Doug Brunt, to her show Friday to promote his first novel, Ghosts of Manhattan.* In the segment, Brunt teased his racy read of a Wall Street bond trader caught up in an all-consuming culture of “high-priced entertainment” involving “lap dances at Scores…[and]…$5000 bottles of champagne.” But, the whilom Internet security CEO assured Megyn’s audience that the bawdy book was entirely fictitious–as to him and Megyn. At least, on AL air.

Introducing the interview, Megyn proudly proclaimed that Brunt’s book has been compared to the works of Charles Dickens and Tom Wolfe (Steve Forbe’s review).** When he began to discuss his wanton work in detail, Megyn playfully remarked, “Now, you write in the book a lot about these…life-style choices, prostitutes, strippers, drugs. How do we know these people?” As Brunt began to chuckle, Megyn queried, “Are these people that we know?…Have they been to our house?”

Laughing, Brunt replied, “Everything is one degree removed from us, uh, Honey.”

Subsequently, after he explained that he had obtained much of the background material from people and friends, Megyn persisted, “Now, there is something else in the book that people need to know about: And, that is a naughty blond reporter.”  Leading her witness, the erstwhile legal eagle exclaimed, “And, we need to get this on the record right now! This person bears no relation to anyone you may know?”

With a twinkle in his eye, Brunt dutifully declared, “No. None.”

Of course, Brunt was not under oath. Perhaps, he was telling the truth about Megyn not being THE “naughty blond reporter” in his book. But, it is almost certain that his sexy GQ pin-up girl with the “killer bees,” who Slate dubbed “a post-feminist news babe,” lies somewhere within waiting to be laid bare.

Off air, Brunt may have been more candid. In a “Q & A” on his Ghosts of Manhattan web site, he revealed, “Had I continued to work in sales and trading as a career, I may have resembled Nick [Wall Street bond trader protagonist] in some way. That’s all I’ll admit to.”

[Author's aside: Ironically, last October, Megyn had her former husband Daniel Kendall on America Live as a guest.]

*America Live – 10/05/12 (@ 1:39 a.m. ET).

**Ibid at @ 1: 43 a.m. ET.

Megyn Kelly: Jon Stewart “Mean and Unfair”

“What? Was that out loud?” Apparently, America Live anchor Megyn Kelly is no big fan of Daily Show host Jon Stewart, who has taken several acidic shots at her (e.g., her maternity leave and contraception coverage positions). In fact, Megyn dubbed the Comedy Central comedian “mean and unfair.”

In an AL panel discussion on the wisdom of President Obama’s appearing on comedy talk shows, Megyn questioned whether Jimmy Fallon would aggressively challenge the President on the issues in his appearance tonight on Fallon’s Late Night show. One of the panelists, humorist  Scott Blakeman responded, “I don’t know, but…Jon Stewart–who took my comedy class actually and he’s…a great guy…and Jon is a liberal like myself–gave…the hardest interview [that] President Obama has ever had….So, comedians can ask even better questions that even journalists sometimes.”*

With a sardonic smile, Megyn stammered, “I think, just FYI, I think, I think Jon Stewart needs to go back to your class and needs a refresher on how to do comedy, on how to do comedy–as opposed to being mean and unfair.”

In response to Megyn’s acerbic remarks, Blakeman insisted, “No, no, he’s great. He’s great. He’s very funny.” Continuing, he maintained, “No, no, he’s very funny. He’s a nice Jewish guy like me.”

Sensing that Blakeman’s adamant defense with unassailable by her distaff suasion, Megyn sweetly smiled and coyly chuckled, “What? Was that out loud? Huh? What? Sour grapes, anyone?”

Grapes or not, Stewart’s disses have seemingly left a sour taste in Megyn’s mouth.

*America Live – 04/24/12 (@ 2:38 p.m. ET)

Huck: McCain, Thompson “Not Smart Enough”?

FNC host Mike Huckabee: “Being called a liar by both John McCain and Fred Thompson…not good.” In his appearance on America Live this afternoon, anchor Megyn Kelly offered the former Arkansas governor and 2008 GOP Presidential candidate the chance to respond to the denials by both his former rivals John McCain and Fred Thompson to his claim that McCain had asked Thompson to stay in the race to help split the conservative vote to boost McCain’s chances.* Before doing so, Huckabee declared, “Being called a liar by both John McCain and Fred Thompson…is not good but, heck, I’ve been called worse by a lot of people, Megyn.”

Then, Huckabee explained, “I heard that news from my campaign chairman Ed Rollins who heard it from three different sources inside the [McCain] camp.” Deftly, he continued, “I thought it was a compliment in that it was a brilliant political move if they did it.” Then, with a sly smile, he snarked, “Now…if they weren’t smart enough to do it, then I apologize for giving them the benefit of being that smart.”

Ouch. Reagan’s 11th Commandment: Forgotten?

America Live – 01/13/12 (@ 1:19 p.m. ET)

[Author's aside: For video of Thompson's denial today on Fox & Friends, link here.]

Kelly’s Kmart Caper: Busted 4 Shoplifting!

Megyn: “Sorry, Kmart: But, thanks for not throwing me in the slammer!” For Halloween, America Live co-host Megyn Kelly pulled a Lindsay Lohan. I.e., she just had to have that special necklace–whether she paid for it or not.

During a shoplifting story today on AL, FNC reporter Trace Gallagher reported on a young couple who had their two-year-old daughter taken from them (after, apparently, forgetting to pay for two sandwiches eaten as they shopped).* When he had concluded his story, a smiling Megyn asked him if he had ever sampled candy that he had not declared at checkout. When he admitted, “Yeah, all the time but I have kids…[and] they pick stuff up and they eat [it]. So, you grab the wrappers and you try to throw them on the counter and sometimes…they don’t always make it on the counter,” With a jaundiced eye, Megyn chuckled, Do you? Do you? Or, do you just slide ‘em in your pocket and say, ‘I’m sorry. They’re like five cents.’”

With a gleam in her eye, Megyn remarked, “I [have] to tell you: when I was twelve-years-old, I, I shoplifted. I got caught shoplifting–at a Kmart!” Feigning outrage, Trace animatedly answered, “What!” Smiling, Megyn explained, “It was really my then best friend who made me do it.” Unconvinced, a grinning Trace retorted, “Sure!”

Elaborating, Megyn revealed, “We completely got busted by her mother who said, ‘Where, where did you get those huge star earrings and those huge star plastic necklaces–because it was Halloween?’ And, my friend said, ‘Megyn’s mother bought them for us,’ and she said, ‘Alright, I’m going to call Mrs. Kelly, and you two girls better go down to the basement and pray to God that Mrs. Kelly says [that] she had not one but two pairs of huge star plastic earrings and huge star plastic necklaces.’ So we did: we went down in the basement and prayed to God that she would lie for us–which, of course, she did not.”

Continuing her account, Megyn remarked, “So, she came back down into the basement, my friend’s mother, and we said, ‘What’d she say?’ And…she said, ‘Your father will be over to take you back to Kmart so you can confess after he finishes his meatloaf. And we did!”

Animatedly, she exclaimed, “We had to go down to the Kmart and confess out crime to the manager of the Kmart. And he told us that we could have been arrested: It was terrifying! And, I tell you what, [I] never stole another thing again. That was my life of crime!”

When a beaming Trace replied, “Your dad was well justified in doing that: he’s a good dad,” Megyn responded, “I’m reformed now….Unlike Lindsay Lohan, I did my penance–and I learned. That’s it!” As a chuckling Megyn buried her head in her hands, Trace riposted, “You did. Criminal!”

Laughing, Megyn concluded, “See you, Trace! That’s it: now, I want be able to run for President or become a Supreme Court Justice because I confessed…my crime on national television. Sorry, Kmart: But, thanks for not throwing me in the slammer!”

Fear not, Megyn! You can still rule your country: if you follow Lindsay’s latest lead, you could still go from “mere” Maxim model (or, rather GQ pinup) to an American Playboy princess. Doubtlessly, your AL acolytes will not be disappointed.

*America Live – 11/02/11 (@ 2:26 p.m. ET)

Megyn Kelly: Kendall Crazy?

“I confess the judge has a conflict of interest.” Wow! If America Live anchor Megyn Kelly did not convince her fans that she is a free spirit with her racy GQ spread and her subsequent bawdy Howard Stern interview, the sexy married mother of two may have succeeded today. Less than two months after returning from maternity leave to America Live, Megyn invited as a guest to her show her husband–no, not Doug Brunt–but her former hubby, Dr. Daniel R. Kendall.

When her “Kelly’s Court” segment began, Megyn asked her legal panel (former prosecutor Jonna Spilbor and FNC legal analyst Mercedes Colwin) whether prosecutors could prove that Michael Jackson’s doctor caused the death of the King of Pop. Subsequently, Megyn explained to her audience that prosecutors claimed that the doctor was “guilty of gross negligence…because he used propofol to treat insomnia and [that] he administered it outside of the operating room…[and] that no reasonable doctor would do that.” Then, with a slight smile, she continued, “So, joining us now is an expert witness…an anesthesiologist by the name of Dr. Dan Kendall from our D.C. bureau.*

Somewhat surreally, Megyn continued, “[w]ho I confess the judge has a conflict of interest since the judge used to be married to Dr. Kendall.” As her legal guests chuckled uncomfortably, Megyn remarked, “But, Dr. Kendall is now happily married to another person as am I. So, there is no conflict of interest.” Subsequently, after giving her handsome former fellow less than two minutes to explain that the doctor should have continuously monitored Jackson and that his actions were, in short, “pretty nuts,” Megyn moved on.

“Pretty nuts,” indeed. Or, was Megyn Kelly Kendall crazy?

*America Live – 09/28/11 (@ 2:47 p.m. ET)

Aly Back In: Juliet Out?

Camerota: “Let’s make it a surprise.” A “Shine” surprise? After abdicating her Fox & Friends Weekend throne for five months, co-host Alisyn Camerota announced her long-awaited return to F&FW tomorrow. Early this morning as she hosted F&F weekday, Aly Tweeted, “FOX News Alert — I’ll be back on F+F this Saturday! …don’t tell Dave and Clayton. let’s make it a surprise. I may wear a disguise.”

Five months to the very day: Aly’s return just in the nick of time? Last week FNC aired a new F&FW promo for its Labor Day weekend that featured her recent sole sub Juliet Huddy with F&FW co-anchors Clayton Morris and Dave Briggs as “One Morning Team” and “the Friends You Trust.” The message seemed pellucidly clear: FNC had dubbed Juliet queen again of the F&FW curvy couch. After all, Aly had been strangely absent from her F&FW post for almost five months (approximately one month longer than the purported “maternity shuffle” for Megyn Kelly): Furthermore, in the interim, Aly had repeated anchored other FNC shows, including, America’s Newsroom, Happening Now, America Live, and even Fox & Friends weekday without returning to her own F&FW.

Perhaps, Aly realized that she needed to move now if she were to reclaim her F&FW throne from Juliet before it was too late: i.e., before her co-hosts, Clayton and Dave, and her viewers switched their allegiance to Juliet. Even though it may appear less likely, FNC Senior VP of Programming Bill Shine himself may have prompted the move to oust Juliet, at least, for now, after her questionable comments two days ago on the O’Reilly Factor: Juliet called GOP Presidential candidate Ron Paul a “yellow belly” who would not appear on O’Reilly and that O’Reilly should have “just slapped him down” – verbally or literally. Coincidently or not, just yesterday, the author wrote, “Unless Alisyn Camerota returns to her long “abandoned” center seat this weekend, F&FW viewers should not be surprised by a ‘contrite’ apology posthaste from jaunty Juliet to Paul and his Praetorian Guard.” (Apparently, Juliet’s apology will have to wait.)

Welcome back, Aly! Hopefully, you will stay. But, whatever you do, do not banish F&FW‘s beloved Juliet from your F&FW realm for good.

Megyn Kelly Disappears

With her show without a word. Apparently, even America Live anchor Megyn Kelly’s lead-in, Happening Now guest host Greg Jarrett, was caught off guard this afternoon: as Jarrett confidently segued from HN to the next Fox News program at 1:00 pm. ET, Jarrett remarked, “America Live begins right now.” Apparently, getting a quick word from his producer, Jarrett quickly glanced at his computer screen and corrected himself, saying, “America’s News Headquarters.”

Subsequently, the screen switched to ANHQ and Kelly Wright began with a “News Alert”: Then, after finishing it, he remarked, “This is America’s News Headquarters. I’m Kelly Wright.” Thereafter, his comely blonde co-host chimed, “Great to see you, Kelly….I’m Jamie Colby.”

Oddly, neither Kelly nor Jamie mentioned that, at least, for the day, they were replacing Megyn Kelly and America’s News HQ was supplanting America Live. Furthermore, to the author’s knowledge, Megyn did not mention yesterday that she or her program would be absent today (Friday). Moreover, Megyn failed to alert her Twitter followers to any AL changes either. Not to mention, when the author consulted FNC’s on-air schedule at FNC’s foxnews.com/fnctv web site (at 1:55 p.m. ET), the “Now” tab showed no program for the 1:00pm slot but rather started with the 3:00 pm one (Studio B w/ Shepard Smith).

Strange indeed. Wherefore art thou, Megyn? Fox News flub-up or Shine “shakeup”?

[Author's aside: Even at the start of the second hour and at the end of show, both Jamie and Kelly failed to acknowledge the obvious--the absence of Megyn Kelly and her show America Live.]

Update: On Labor Day itself, Megyn answered: She and America Live reappeared. Perhaps, it had been merely a Fox News flub-up. Or, was it Shine’s inadvertent portent?

Megyn: Yardley’s Mom

Back in the saddle again: from GQ pinup to Fox(y) flapper. Yesterday America Live anchor Megyn Kelly returned from maternity leave to her FNC show looking as hot as ever. And, she hopes to stay that way.

Just about nine months ago (December 2010), Megyn graced the pages of GQ Men of the Year (December 2010) in a plucky, provocative pictorial for her fans: Then, around five months later (April 7),  she left for maternity leave. Perhaps, Megyn was merely holding her randy devotees over while she had the “impertinence” to have her second child, Yardley Evans (April 14). After all, they would have quite a wait for her to return, i.e., not, the usual three months but four long ones.

When Megyn finally returned to her AL admirers yesterday, she did not disappoint. After leaving them as a sexy, long-tressed Stacy’s Mom, she returned to them as wanton, short-bobbed flapper ready to rev her boys in a whole new way. Or, rather, in a retro way.

Welcome back, Megyn!

Juliet Huddy: “See You Next Weekend”

Where’s Aly: lost in Shine’s “shuffle”? The purported “maternity shuffle” ends Monday with Megyn Kelly’s return to her show America Live. However, if Fox & Friends Weekend guest co-host Juliet Huddy’s adieu today is true, it appears that things may not be quite what F&F‘s official co-anchors Clayton Morris (Aly’s “maternity shuffle”), Dave Briggs (Aly “WILL be back”), and Alisyn Camerota (“I’ll be back”) would have their F&FW fans believe: I.e., Aly will finally return to F&FW when Megyn’s maternity leave ends. At the end of F&FW today, Juliet was thanked by Dave “once again for filling in,” she smiling replied, “My pleasure, my pleasure. See you again next weekend.”

Do tell, Juliet. Megyn will be back on her own show next week but Aly won’t. Aly’s “shuffle”: Bill Shine’s “shakeup”?

Shannon Bream: Megyn Kelly Looks AMAZING!

Former Maxim model Courtney Friel: “She looks awesome.” Last week, Deadline Hollywood reported that Megyn Kelly will return to America Live next Monday exactly four months after taking maternity leave on April 8. Yesterday, the FNC foxes began to herald the return of their alpha vixen: Megyn’s America Live fill-in Shannon Bream trumpeted, “Just saw @MegynKelly and she looks AMAZING! She’s back Monday!!” Today, FNC entertainment correspondent Courtney Friel chimed, “She looks awesome and is sporting a new haircut.”

Apparently, Slate’s “Post-Feminist News Babe” is back in rare form and is raring to go after giving birth to her second child (daughter Yardley Evans) on April 14. Whether or not she has shed those baby pounds and returned to her GQ pinup prime is yet to be seen. Regardless, Megyn’s avid AL acolytes are assuredly more than eager to welcome back their brainy, blond beauty.

Whether Megyn’s return to America Live is short-lived is not yet known. Once The Five has ended its run this summer, FNC Senior VP of Programming may yet promote his “rising star” to that evening hour. Nevertheless, at least, for now, welcome back, Megyn!

Clayton: “The [Aly] Update”

“Where’s Alisyn?…It might be 2014.” This morning Fox & Friends Weekend co-anchor Clayton Morris and his co-hosts Dave Briggs and Molly Line joked anew about Alisyn Camerota’s personally promised return. After welcoming viewers mid show, a grinning Clayton remarked, “Emails, we saw people out here for the concert series [asking], ‘Where’s Aly? Where’s Alisyn?’ We said, ‘Uh, it might be 2014.’”*

As Molly laughed heartily, Dave chuckled, “Maybe, by the time the presidential elections come around.” Perhaps, not quite ready to relinquish her reins anytime soon, Molly exclaimed, “She’s still here [FNC], though. She’s here all the time! She’s everywhere. She’s all over.”

Then, trying to reassure Aly’s fervant F&FW fans, Clayton insisted, “She’ll be back soon. The maternity, the maternity shuffle is still continuing. So, that’s the update.”

At least, “that’s the plan for now.” As an absent Aly stays adrift on FNC weekdays for three months running with appearances on America’s Newsroom, Happening Now, America Live, and even the weekday Fox & Friends, “the maternity shuffle” claim seems less and less credible. Nevertheless, Clayton may be right.

Who knows? Maybe, Aly will return for her third stint at Fox & Friends Weekend in 2014–if the F&FW ship again starts to list with “the new girl.”

*Fox & Friends Weekend – 07/16/11 (@ 8:01 a.m. ET)

“Update” update: Apparently, Aly is still not so sure about her return either. When a Twitter follower of hers asked, “Miss you on weekend with Dave and Clayton….[a]re you ever coming back [to F&FW]?,” Aly evasively answered, “I miss the guys too!”

“King” Jerrick: Clayton Who?

Yet again? Yes, Fox & Friends Weekend guest co-host Mike Jerrick returned to the curvy couch today once more without a single word of acknowledgement of the co-anchor that he had replaced, Clayton Morris. His odd omission was made especially conspicuous in light of the fact that his fellow F&FW “guest” co-host Molly Line began each hour proclaiming that she was “in for Alisyn Camerota.” Stranger yet, co-host Dave Briggs likewise failed to mention the vacationing Clayton when he introduced Mike at the start of the show: He simply said, “Good morning to all of you! Molly and Mike are in this morning….It’s been a while, Mike.”

An unceremonious snub to Clayton? Perchance. But, perhaps, the F&FW producers merely deemed it a mite mal a propos to point out that their F&FW golden oldie was subbing for his greener, younger Philly friend. Nevertheless, even F&FW guest Karl Rove seemed to conveniently overlook his chum Clayton’s absence. In fact, when he was introduced for his regular F&FW segment by Mike, Rove fulsomely flattered, “I can’t believe it: We have the king of Philadelphia here in New York today, Mike.”*

Taking his cue, Dave playfully bent over in obiesance twice to Mike as Molly dutifully followed suit, saying, “Now, we have to bow.” Smiling, Rove remarked, “Dave, Molly, I went to Philadelphia and he made me kneel and kiss the ring before he allowed me into the studio. It was really amazing.” As a deadpanning Dave declared “Right,” Molly pointed to Mike’s ring finger, jesting, “Oh! Wow! We had to do that, too, this morning.”

Perhaps, a fitting tribute to the former F&FW royal. But, a tip of the hat to the new kid on the curvy couch who would be king might have been in order, too. Unless, of course, the “King of Philadelphia” is plotting his return to his erstwhile F&FW throne.

*Fox & Friends Weekend – 07/09/11 (8:16 a.m. ET)

Shine’s Line: “That’s the Plan for Now”

“I’m Molly Line in for Alisyn Camerota.” Fox & Friends Weekend co-host Molly Line so welcomed her viewers to the show four times this morning with that insistent line.* Perchance, the current Fox & Friends Saturday co-host who twice laughed seemingly at the prospect of the return of “regular” co-host Alisyn Camerota to F&FW intended to iterate the company line to convince doubtful Alisyn Camerota fans that their favorite host will some day return to her center seat on the curvy couch.

Of course, Molly, “the new girl” of F&F, may well find her task to be Sisyphean at best. After all, Aly has been absent for almost three months from Fox & Friends Weekend and her frequent appearances on other F&F daytime shows, i.e., America’s Newsroom, America Live, Happening Now, and even weekday Fox & Friends in the meantime seem to belie Molly’s now fervent assertions.

At the end of F&FW today, a, perhaps, telling exchange occurred. After F&FW co-anchor Dave Briggs promo’d the program tomorrow, he declared, “Molly Line will be back Saturday, I believe. I assume.” Arching her eyebrows, a smiling Molly shrugged her shoulders and exclaimed, “That’s the plan right now. Yeah!” Chuckling, Dave echoed, “That’s the plan for right now.”

That’s the plan for now: Molly Line in for Alisyn Camerota next Saturday, too. With Aly on vacation all this weekend, Fox News Senior VP of Programming Bill Shine’s “plan for now” for Aly ironically will at least be longer than his plan for his new “shakeup” summertime series The Five (if she returns next weekend). However, unfortunately, for Aly’s acolytes her recently personally promised return seems neither imminent nor foreseeable.

*Fox & Friends Weekend – 07/09/11 (at the top of each hour – 6:00 a.m. ET; 7:00 a.m. ET; 7:59 a.m. ET; and 8:59 a.m. ET)

Apologetic Aly: “I’ll Be Back”

Camerota: “I do feel like I sorta vanished without a trace….I’m sorry for all the questions.” Today, Fox & Friends Weekend co-host Alisyn Camerota called in to her weekend show to reassure her concerned fans that she would indeed return to F&FW. At least, sometime in the future.

Before Aly’s telephonic appearance, F&FW producers ran a comedic collage of clips of her and her co-anchors Dave Briggs and Clayton Morris, at Shea Stadium on FOX fan night yesterday.* In the final snippet, America’s Newsroom co-host Bill Hemmer grabbed a reluctant Aly and led her away from her F&FW boys. As Dave and Clayton protested, Aly threw them a kiss and remarked, “I’ve got to go with Bill. I’m sorry. I’ll be back!”

As the humorous montage ended, Clayton dryly commented, “That’s the story of our lives, Bill Hemmer yanking Alisyn away. And, we…managed to get Alisyn on the phone this morning.” On cue, Aly animatedly exclaimed, “Hey, guys! What’s going on, my estranged TV husbands and their new wife [Molly Line]. Hey, Molly!” As Molly laughed, Clayton commented, “I know, my TV wife: we miss you.”

Shaking his head with a wry smile, Dave interjected, “You left us for Bill Hemmer. It was right there.”

Amused, Aly explained, “Well, it’s not permanent. As you know, I’m very fickle. And, I like the whole sort of square dance of different men. So, I’ll be back.”

Clayton responded, “Oh, good. Yeah, it was great to see you last night.” Then, echoing his excepted explanation of two weeks ago, he remarked, “We’re doing the maternity shuffle right now. Explain this maternity shuffle because you’re in the midst of it. Right?”

Elucidating somewhat, Aly answered, “Yeah, Megyn [Kelly of America Live] is out because she had a pretty baby girl; and Martha MacCallum [of America's Newsroom] is filling in her; and I’m filling in for Martha; and sometimes I’m filling in for Megyn; and Molly is so sweet to fill in for me.” Then, she rightly remarked, “I know it’s been a crazy couple of months.”

After some subsequent impertinent palaver, Clayton commented, “Finally, we’ve been able to answer all of that question [sic] because we get e-mails and Tweets all the time, ‘Where’s Aly?’ So, now everyone knows.”

Apologetically, Aly answered, “I know, and I feel so badly about that. I mean I do feel like I sorta vanished without a trace even though I am hiding in plain sight from 9 to 11 every morning on the East Coast. But, I do really miss you guys, and I really miss all of our loyal viewers.”

Conciliatorialy, Aly concluded, “And, so I’m sorry for all the questions. And, I’m just happy to see you guys last night, and…we’ll be reunited.”

But, when? During Megyn’s maternity leave, Martha has repeatedly gone home to America’s Newsroom while Aly has stayed away from Fox & Friends Weekend. Something afoot, Aly?

[Author's aside: In the intro to the final hour of the show, Molly remarked, "In for Alisyn. Get a chance to hang out with you guys until she returns: "The new girl" appears to intimate that she has secured the center seat on the F&FW curvy couch until Aly comes back--at least, on Saturdays. As for Sundays, it seems that Ainsley may have similarly locked in her sub role for Aly: During Aly's phone-in (7:34 a.m. ET), Dave declared, "We want to say that we really appreciate your, your fill-ins here: Molly and Ainsley have done a great job." N.B. No mention was made of Juliet Huddy or any other Aly sub.]

*Fox & Friends Weekend – 06/18/11 (7:32 a.m. ET)

Clayton: Aly’s “Maternity Shuffle”

Or, Bill Shine’s three-card monte? Just when is Fox & Friends Weekend co-anchor Alisyn Camerota returning to her show?  Three weeks ago, co-host Clayton Morris said, “She might be back next weekend.” Two weeks ago, he said, “We don’t know.” Saturday, he said, “The maternity leave shuffle continues. Uh, Aly still filling in for Martha [MacCallum on America's Newsroom] who’s filling in for Megyn [Kelly on America Live]: So, a few more weeks.”*

As Clayton continued to fecklessly try to allay the fears of Aly’s fans Saturday, guest co-host Molly Line laughed yet again and co-anchor Dave Briggs smiled once more. But, Aly’s acolytes continue to wonder why she still has not returned to her F&FW post in eight weeks. Not unnoticed is that Aly’s “maternity shuffle partner” Martha MacCallum has returned to her own program, America’s Newsroom, for the last two weeks (if but for a day or so): furthermore, Martha said that she will also be on AN this coming Thursday and Friday.**

However, not only has Aly not gone back to F&FW but also she has not answered her Twitter followers (including the author) as to when she will. Perhaps, Aly has simply moved on or FNC Executive VP of Programming Bill Shine has moved her on. Remember, almost two months before Megyn Kelly went on maternity leave, Shine appeared to do an audition for the curvy couch center seat on F&FW (and F&F). (Cf. “5 Straight Days: 5 Hot Hostesses!“)

Shine, no more unexplained F&FW exits, e.g., Kiran Chetry, Page Hopkins, etc. Your FNC viewers and Aly’s fans deserve better. Is Aly still your F&FW starter?

*Fox & Friends Saturday – 06/04/11 (@ 9:01 a.m. ET)

**America’s Newsroom – 06/03/11 (@ 10:59 a.m. ET)